The Blakes on a Mission

Who can estimate the value of a living fountain of water in a barren desert? - Finney

2011-04-22T07:42:00.000-07:00

I haven't been blogging for a while now...between working from home, homeschooling, taking care of my home and my pocket beagle business...I just haven't had the time to remember to blog. But I have to say that I miss it so much. There is definitely something about blogging that encourages me in my spirit.

Blogging for me is about sharing what God is doing in and around me and recently he has really done something beautiful inside of me. About two weeks ago I went to a new church and while I wasn't expecting much from the church itself, I was expecting from God. Let me explain what I mean by "I wasn't expecting much from the church". I try not to expect too much from churches these days because honestly if you walk in trying to measure a church by some standard you've created then more than not, you'll be disappointed and once disappointment sets in, so does distraction and a judgmental attitude. When those things rear their ugly head I am no longer able to really learn and receive.

Just as no one individual is perfect, no church is perfect. So when visiting I expect little from the church but great things from God. As I sat there and worship began, I just started talking to God about the numbness I've been feeling. The "joy of my salvation" wasn't so joyful anymore, it was like a dull "hooray" on an honest day. Peace and hope for MORE change in my flesh tomorrow was hard to come by.

Have you ever felt this way? There is a great Keith Green song that quotes scripture and it says:

Create in me a clean heart, oh God

And renew a right spirit within me...

RESTORE UNTO ME, THE JOY OF MY SALVATION

And renew a right spirit within me

I could write a lot about each line of this but I'll stick with "Restore unto me the joy of my salvation". This comes straight from Psalms 51:12 and has always resonated in my spirit. From the time I was saved I knew that I would never be the same. God saved me from so much but yet it was so much that not many could see.

I was not currently in an abusive home, my mother provided for my needs, I made good grades but on the inside, even at age 10, I was a wreck. I've always been one of those individuals that can not walk away from the question: "Why?". "Why in the world are we here? What happens when we die?". No matter what I did, once I got alone and it was quiet...these are the questions that plagued my mind. I couldn't understand why others weren't bothered by these questions and why it seems as if they sat solely on MY chest each day.

I was depressed, selfish, visionless and of them all...I was hopelessly hopeless. Hopeless is one of the most ugly places to be. Living day in and day out with no hope for tomorrow is no way to live at all. I'm going to try to not make this a really long post and say that God saved me at a camp that I went to as a child. They reenacted Christ's crucifixion on a hill and it was on that hill that I fell in love and was given hope.

I will always remember the nights and mornings that were thereafter totally lacking in hopelessness and how much I didn't miss it! The joy that sprung forth was amazing, I woke with a smile on my face and I dug into the word with giddiness. I was changed forever.

That same love has motivated me for the past 17 years but there are times when I feel as though that love and the reality of that love is a memory more than a reality. If you've walked with God for any number of years you've more likely to have experienced this - either due to allowing the cares of this world to entangle you, getting busy with the WORK of the ministry without keeping the relationship that started it all, allowing your time with Him to slip away or just consistently choosing what you want over what God is speaking to you.

Now back to church - as I sat there and the worship began, I began listening and singing along. As each word came out of my mouth about the blood of Jesus it was like a flood of remembrance washed over me. I remembered the darkness I once lived in and the hopelessness that plagued me as though it was yesterday. Hot tears began to stream down my cheeks uncontrollably and as I sang each word my heart pounded violently. I thought I might bust at the seams...what a gift I had been given, more precious than silver and gold, a gift worth my life.

While the teaching was very good that day, I walked away from the church building realizing that had I just come to him...expecting, this could have happened days ago. He is the reason for living - Yes, I love my husband and my children but HE IS MY REASON FOR LIVING. Without him, I don't know if I'd still be here. Nothing fills me like He does and nothing moves my heart like the love that I have found in Him....AND from THAT realization...the joy is unleashed, HOPE is restored.

I am saddened by the increase in Christians who have let go of the relationship and traded it in for the busyness of the ministry, they can only go so long until they sputter out. Or those who have just grown tired because of wrong teaching and they no longer feel that they can "do" what it takes to be right with God.

If you are one who has allowed ANYTHING to get in the way of the relationship that started it all, I plead with you to remember what you are saved from and the love that saved you from it. MAKE the time to spend in His word, REMEMBER what he saved you from AND even more importantly what He has saved you FOR.

I have hope for change TODAY, I have LOVE that not many know of and BLESSINGS not of this world.

When was the last time?

2010-07-05T15:48:00.000-07:00

When was the last time you blew one of these?

Everytime I blow one of these I think of what the word of God does to us. When we receive it for the truth that it is and let it move us then we are blown away with full capability of reproducing and spreading the good news around with us. Cheesy huh? Well, I'm known for it so...too bad! ;)

Two words

2010-07-02T22:01:00.000-07:00

Tonight I used two words together that I've never used before. They didn't come out naturally and actually I said it wrong one time. I spoke to my long lost half brother tonight on the phone for the first time since finding him a few days ago. I am still in shock. I keep asking myself...when will this feel real? It was a wonderful conversation and didn't wanna get off the phone.

It's so amazing to be talking to a man who knew my father and is in himself a piece of my father. A good man who has walked a tough road and has come out shining on the other end. I can't put the gratefulness and thankfulness I feel into words. I've always felt so thankful for everything. I know Thailand had a lot to do with the level at which I feel thankful but even before then I have always known how precious life is.

I suppose losing my father at 7 and then watching my mother deteriorate from degenerative disc disease I learned early on that life is precious and you can't take anything for granted. I had to make a late night run to Wal-mart tonight to get some dog food and while I was remembering things that we needed at the house I was grabbing them and throwing them into the buggy.

I'm a price checker but with the things that we normally buy I don't check out the price...I just throw it in. Tonight as I was tossing things into the buggy I just stopped...mid toilet paper isle...and said outloud: Thank you...thank you!! It was a precious moment between me and my God but the shear fact that I could just toss things in my buggy and not fret and worry over each penny is such a blessing.

There are so many people who struggle just to feed their children and here I am deciding which "healthy" bread doesn't contain high fructose corn syrup...not concerned with the $.50-$1 that I'll pay more for that "healthy" bread. I grabbed the toilet paper and thought about how thankful I was that I didn't HAVE to purchase the cheapest, most-fallin-apart-toilet-paper-ever-invented!!!!! I was thankful that I walked by the clearance rack and saw that cute shirt for $4 that Joss would love and I didn't have to pass it by.

Thankful that my legs can carry me out the front of Walmart and I was so greatful that I was about to go out to my running car that's tank is full. Thankful that I'm driving home to the love of my life and incredible children. As I looked at the sky driving home I was thankful to have been born in America and SOOO thankful that I was not born to parents that didn't want me and that I was not born into a country in the middle of a war. So many things could have happened differently...but they didn't.

But most of all I was thankful that I have peace - beautiful peace that passes all understanding. Peace in life and peace in death.

Tonight was a wonderful night and the conversation I had tonight will stick with me for the rest of my life. I'm so thankful to have found them both. I look forward to mastering the use of these two words over the next few weeks and months - for they are mine now...."Our Daddy" would be so proud.

Be thankful tonight friends. I'll leave you with my favorite song of all time:

Blessed!

2010-07-01T22:35:00.000-07:00

Today was day number 3 that I have not called my long lost half brother! I know it sounds insane but I've been looking for a moment without the kids so I could just cry my eyes out and talk but I just haven't found it...well, I haven't found it before 10:45pm (which is waaay later in his time zone).

Tonight he wrote me two messages and I just sat there and wept. I can't believe this is really happening. I'll share a few excerpts with you.

"Dad told me of his prostate cancer and I was devastated. The very next sentence out of his mouth was nothing about self-pity, or his tough road ahead. He looked at me and said...." I just want 5 good years so there is a chance Steffie (what he called you, not sure how he spelled it) may remember me. I know you don't remember much before age 10, but the point here is this is an example of his genuine love for you. You were always at the forefront of his thoughts. I get tired chasing my kids and I am healthy. Dad NEVER complained about raising a baby at his advanced age. I think this is why I have such a strong devotion to my kids ... he set the example."

As if that isn't enough to keep me crying all night long there was more....

"Dad was a very active person, generous to a fault, and was chronically late. Do you know how many dates I ticked off my girlfriends because I was so late arriving at the movies, or the skating rink? He could never be on time. I owe him because I am so punctual it is rediculous. I am never late, and my kids always tease me about arriving early to places. My wife and I had a new year's resolution a few years ago to try to actually be late to places we went to like parties and get togethers. Well....we weren't very successful."

And the last one:

"Dad's favorite meal: Steak (sirloin) medium rare, baked potato and boiled shrimp. "

Why did I choose these specific excerpts? Well, the first one is obvious but the last two...not so much.

First: Anyone who knows me knows that I have always dealt with being late to EVERYTHING. I was late so much in high school that they made me do two extra weeks at the end of the school year to make up my time.

Second: my two favorite foods are mexican food (specifically salsa) and steak...medium rare.

It's amazing how these small things mean so much. Andy's heart is so amazing to me...it takes everything I've got within me not to forget my responsibilities and jump on a plane to spend a few days just talking. I wish I could do this so badly but there is just too much going on right now and besides - I'd want John to go with me but then getting someone to keep all three kids for a few day is a huge task.

I am so blessed.

Late Adulthood

2010-06-30T23:43:00.001-07:00

Hello dear friends,

I've been thinking a lot about aging recently - yes, I know...not worth much of my thoughts but nonetheless, that is what I've been contemplating. I'm taking some online courses and my Human Development class is onto the "Late Adulthood" chapters and well it's just simply challenging. I've always been one that has thought about death. Even as a child I always thought about what life was all about and what it would be like to die and finally see Jesus face to face. I've often thought about what kind of legacy I want to leave behind and what will people remember about me. (this is all so me focused really...isn't the real goal to be so full of Jesus that non of you remains to be seen?)

All of these things are deep heavy thoughts but I remember thinking them as early as well, 10 because that's as far back as I can remember. ha! So with all of this talk about aging it got me thinking about things.

What would be on my bucket list?
What kind of legacy do I want to leave?
Am I doing what I should now to ensure that I'll be feeling good later?

So, I'm gonna sit down with my hubby and ponder our bucket list and talk about what kind of God legacy we want to leave for our children. I want to think about changes that we can make to ensure that we'll feel better later such as consistent exercise or a hobby that gets us moving - something we can do together - BESIDES COMPUTERS! (We're such computer geeks) Gardening is definitely out - I seem to have a black finger instead of a green finger...bringing death to all that I plant.

I welcome any hobby ideas and if you have the time to ponder these things then feel free to share what you come up with in a comment below.

Here are a few links to check out that were put up in my class:

High Tech Aging

Successful Aging

What is successful aging?

Bucket List

READY

2010-06-29T20:56:00.000-07:00

This is Stephanie...signing back on. Honestly, I don't know if I'll be able to keep up with writing but I enjoy it so much I figured I should get back on the bandwagon no matter what life brings my way or how busy I get. I'm a communicator and I have stuff to communicate dang it! ;)

I could go into a long update but I figure that that'll just bore you to tears so I'll start back up with the biggest thing happening at this moment in my life. As I write those words I can't stop the tears from welling up in my eyes.

My father died from cancer when I was 7 years old. I don't remember anything before I was 10. So as you can imagine this has been hard for me to deal with over the years. When my son Josiah turned 7 I had a revelation that I was not too young to have remembered anything...I just didn't remember ANYTHING! I pictured myself being 2 or 3 when my father died - not really being cognitively aware or relational on a mature level. But NO! I was 7 years old. When I look at Josiah - who is now 8 - and think about the conversations we must have had and the interaction we had my heart literally aches.

I can't remember a thing. Not his eyes, his smell, his laugh...nothing. Now, because I have a loving relationship with my heavenly father I've never been drastically affected by this. I don't have bouts with depression or horrific father's days but I do miss him and I miss the memories that don't exist. I have always wondered if I'm like my father...I've wondered what his favorite movie was...what his humor was like. So many questions...

Now to bring you to the point of my story. Before my mother and father met, my father was married to a woman named Nancy. From what I've been told they could not have children so they decided to adopt. They adopted two children...Andrew and Lissa. They raised these two children all the way to adulthood. These two people had my father all of their growing years. When Andrew and Lissa were about high school graduate age I was born. My father had apparently divorced Nancy (I have no clue when) and married my mother, who was significantly younger by the way.

Andrew and his family a long time ago

I don't know what happened between the kids and my father and mother but my parents left to live in Haiti to do medical missions work at a mission called the "Christian Mission of Pignon" that my father helped to start with his good friend Dr. Guy Theodore, a native to Haiti. My father died in Haiti.

I don't think I ever saw Andrew or Lissa again. After the death of my father, my mother went a bit crazy and was blown whichever way the wind carried her, or so I'm told. It wasn't until my grandmother broke her hip that we came to Texas to help her re-cooperate in 1989. We never left.

It wasn't until I was around 19 or 20 that I realized that Andrew and Lissa existed and were still out there somewhere. My family was out there some where. My mother pulled out a chest that I had never seen before and that day I beheld treasures more precious to me than any gold or money. I saw pictures of my father that I had never seen before. It blew me away - I looked just like him as a teenager and I had picked a man that resembled him as a teenager without ever having seen my father at this age.

I began doing searches on different search engines and the online yellow pages. I kept coming up empty handed because "Smith" is a very common last name of course! I was so discouraged. I even paid a search company to help me but they only provided me with a list of names and I called each and every one of them and never found them.

I had just recently been reviewed to be on a show called "Troy the Locator" to find them. I had been in the review process for being selected for their upcoming season. This show reunites family members. I had been waiting to hear back from them. Over the years I had randomly searched google, myspace and facebook but never with any success....until two days ago.

About two years ago I found out that Lissa married a man with the last name of "Frank" and I did a search for her on Facebook. There were a few but there was only one with the same hometown as my birthplace. I searched her page over for any assurance that she was the one I was looking for and then I thought to look in her friends for Andrew and there he was: Andy!

I could hardly believe it. I requested to be their friend and waited patiently. I received a message from Andy this morning stating that he was glad that to be in touch with me. He wrote:

"I understand from Lori that you have so many questions about our father and I imagine I can answer most of them. I will never forget the glow in his face when you were born."

"I imagine I can answer most of them"...do you know what those words mean to me? I feel like an emotional wreck. I suppose the realization of something that I've been waiting on for soo long is really surreal and I am filled with so many different emotions that it makes me feel like a typical woman! I've always prided myself in the fact that I'm pretty emotionally stable. Yes, for those of you who know me, I cry at the drop of a hat when watching a movie but in general I'm very stable and proud of it! ;0)

So all these feelings are catching me off guard. I've got so much to ask and I can't wait to meet them but I suppose there is always that possibility of rejection or finding out information that is less than perfect (which I'm ok with). The biggest emotion is excitement. I'm just so thankful to have found them and I am so thankful for the opportunity to get to know them and who they are...and hopefully more of the Smith family.

Pray for me as I put one foot in front of the other, walking through this door. It's not easy for me but I'm so ready.

If a picture says a thousand words then...enough said.

Renters nightmare...

2009-10-05T20:24:00.000-07:00

I woke up this morning at 7am bright eyed and hopeful but as I began calling realtors to find a rental home my cheerfulness was over shadowed by a new gloomy reality. In Denver you must make 3 times the amount of your rent...be able to prove it with paycheck stubs and tax returns have great credit and pass an extensive rental history check...which all takes about 2-5 days!!!

At one point I just sat there staring at all the homes I had marked as favorites on the computer - they were all being rented out by realtor agencies...and all of them said I had to meet those requirements. They basically said..."Best of luck...did you get a Sunday paper because the only hope you have is with a rental by owner..."

Then a light when on and I remembered that John did pick up a Sunday paper! So...I started trying to weed through the non-user friendly paper...with no pictures...and vague descriptions. I prayed for a moment and then went to work. I ran into the same problem with many of them because they were by realtors also but I found 3 that were willing to show us their homes.

We loaded up the fussy kids and we met with Andy...who is from another country...not sure which one. He liked us right off and said we could move in today! No credit check...no rental history verification...no employment verification...nothing! Normally I would say this guy is taking a huge risk but I know we won't do him wrong.

It's not that we have bad rental history - it's that the realtors didn't like the fact that we were in Thailand for 4 years and they couldn't check before this last December...and they didn't like that we didn't have check stubs...nor that our past years tax returns show a missionaries salary...not even a fraction of what would be required to rent these homes...but Andy didn't care...Thank God for Andy!

We're going to be moving in tomorrow...I'll post some pics soon. On an awesome...different note...the bible school started today and it went wonderfully! I'm so excited to get to go tomorrow and meet the students face to face. Keep us all in your prayers please! It's supposed to snow Saturday!?!?!?!! Craziness!

On the road again...

2009-10-04T12:27:00.000-07:00

I really can't finish the ending of the lyrics to that song...lol...I am done with the road for a while...unless, the Lord demands otherwise. Well, we made it - we're here in Colorado. I have all sorts of mixed emotions and I can't pin down and stick with a one of them.

Some of you may or may not know but after John returned home from South Africa, after having been gone for a really rough 3 1/2 weeks...my mother passed away. It was unexpected and shocking...although I believe it was her time. I still haven't wrapped my brain around the fact that she is gone. I know she's in heaven and I'll see her again some day but it just doesn't seem real. Even as I looked at her laying in her casket...it was like it was a dream...a hurtful dream but a dream nontheless.

John arrived home on Monday - my mother passed away on Thursday - family night was Sunday and the funeral was Monday...THEN we buried her on Tuesday...during all this we had to be packing and preparing for moving to Denver, CO. If it hadn't been for the love and support of the body of Christ - specifically Liberty Lighthouse Church...I don't know what would have happened.

They poured out love on us through cookies...food...hugs...calls...watching our children...cleaning...helping us pack...and more. It's amazing to see the body of Christ functioning as God instructed us. I literally felt the love of God through them...and through loosing my mom...that love really helped me keep going strong.

So we're here in Denver!!! Man, it's beautiful...the mountains are so gorgeous and some of them are capped in white *grin*. I wish I could say I am enjoying every second but I have to say this is one of those times when I am having to bear in and hold on. Leaving everyone behind was hard of course...then my mom...and the stress of funeral preparations and tying up of loose ends...our children are in disarray...and I think this is the thing that bothers me the most.

They missed their dad and nothing was normal while he was gone to South Africa and then once he got home it just got more unnormal. Josiah took the news very hard about his grandmother...Jude on the other hand seemed fine until the end of the funeral upon which he proceeded to cry the most gut wrenching cry I've ever heard come out of him...into my chest...with no signs of letting up.

They then had to stay at others homes so we could work through the night and during the day to make up for lost time due to the funeral...once we finally got on the road they just weren't themselves and it's been a struggle to offer something solid for them to stand on. When kids move around a lot it's important to give them things that are consistant and in this transition it just hasn't happened. Don't get me wrong...they are great...still laughing...they're just testing new boundries and trying to figure out what's going on...

Joss isn't feeling well...the boys are having a hard time being stuck in the car house hunting or in the hotel room with 4 dogs...(which are in a crate by the way)...the only rooms they had available were upstairs...and my dogs have never been up or down stairs so I have to literally drag them up and down the stairs 6-7 times a day for potty breaks.

Two of the dogs are sick...sporatically throwing up or having accidents...the tv has a sound gage on it and you can't turn it up past 5 notches and with the air on you can't hear the tv...and OUR BOX FAN BROKE! And to top it all off...we arrived on the weekend and can't get anyone to visit house and we have until the Tuesday morning to have our 26ft truck unloaded and returned!!!!

Ok...sooo I'm complaining...I know...I'm going to go complain where I'm supposed to be complaining and let him fix up my heart and renew my strength. Matter of fact...I'll start walking in reality now:

1. We have a roof over our heads and each other...
2. We have the honor of going where he leads us...
3. Colorado is beautiful and the weather is a nice change...
4. DBI is starting and I get to be apart of it...
5. My boys are fantastic and so loving (Jude literally tells me he loves me every 20-30 minutes)
6. I'M WALKING THROUGH THIS WITH THE LOVE OF MY LIFE!
7. Jesus is KING and no matter what is happening...that doesn't change.
8. I have friends that I count as priceless treasures in Sherman Texas who love us...
9. This is another adventure and while I don't feel up for the challenge right now...I know that his mercy's are new every morning...and it is in Him that I can place my trust.
10. This will make us stronger...with the end result being that we are more equipped for His service...
11. Colorado has new friends to be met and made and work to be done...

We saw some cool stuff on the way...

Link (Josiah's turtle) decided that he likes road trips...although he would prefer not being stuck with the dogs next time...

Pastor Stan - We'll miss you!

Jossalyn found her riding spot!

We love you Liberty Lighthouse...no goodbye's...just see you soon!

Vision of the Lost

2009-08-27T00:05:00.001-07:00

A Vision Of The Lost

By William Booth (1829-1912)

On one of my recent journeys, as I gazed from the coach window, I was led into a train of thought concerning the condition of the multitudes around me. They were living carelessly in the most open and shameless rebellion against God, without a thought for their eternal welfare. As I looked out of the window, I seemed to see them all . . . millions of people all around me given up to their drink and their pleasure, their dancing and their music, their business and their anxieties, their politics and their troubles. Ignorant - willfully ignorant in many cases - and in other instances knowing all about the truth and not caring at all. But all of them, the whole mass of them, sweeping on and up in their blasphemies and devilries to the Throne of God. While my mind was thus engaged, I had a vision.

I saw a dark and stormy ocean. Over it the black clouds hung heavily; through them every now and then vivid lightening flashed and loud thunder rolled, while the winds moaned, and the waves rose and foamed, towered and broke, only to rise and foam, tower and break again.

In that ocean I thought I saw myriads of poor human beings plunging and floating, shouting and shrieking, cursing and struggling and drowning; and as they cursed and screamed they rose and shrieked again, and then some sank to rise no more.

And I saw out of this dark angry ocean, a mighty rock that rose up with it’s summit towering high above the black clouds that overhung the stormy sea. And all around the base of this great rock I saw a vast platform. Onto this platform, I saw with delight a number of the poor struggling, drowning wretches continually climbing out of the angry ocean. And I saw that a few of those who were already safe on the platform were helping the poor creatures still in the angry waters to reach the place of safety.

On looking more closely I found a number of those who had been rescued, industriously working and scheming by ladders, ropes, boats and other means more effective, to deliver the poor strugglers out of the sea. Here and there were some who actually jumped into the water, regardless of the consequences in their passion to "rescue the perishing." And I hardly know which gladdened me the most - the sight of the poor drowning people climbing onto the rocks reaching a place of safety, or the devotion and self-sacrifice of those whose whole being was wrapped up in the effort for their deliverance.

As I looked on, I saw that the occupants of that platform were quite a mixed company. That is, they were divided into different "sets" or classes, and they occupied themselves with different pleasures and employments. But only a very few of them seemed to make it their business to get the people out of the sea.

But what puzzled me most was the fact that though all of them had been rescued at one time or another from the ocean, nearly everyone seemed to have forgotten all about it. Anyway, it seemed the memory of its darkness and danger no longer troubled them at all. And what seemed equally strange and perplexing to me was that these people did not even seem to have any care - that is any agonizing care - about the poor perishing ones who were struggling and drowning right before their very eyes . . . many of whom were their own husbands and wives, brothers and sisters and even their own children.

Now this astonishing unconcern could not have been the result of ignorance or lack of knowledge, because they lived right there in full sight of it all and even talked about it sometimes. Many even went regularly to hear lectures and sermons in which the awful state of these poor drowning creatures was described.

I have always said that the occupants of this platform were engaged in different pursuits and pastimes. Some of them were absorbed day and night in trading and business in order to make gain, storing up their savings in boxes, safes and the like.

Many spent their time in amusing themselves with growing flowers on the side of the rock, others in painting pieces of cloth or in playing music, or in dressing themselves up in different styles and walking about to be admired. Some occupied themselves chiefly in eating and drinking, others were taken up with arguing about the poor drowning creatures that had already been rescued.

But the thing to me that seemed the most amazing was that those on the platform to whom He called, who heard His voice and felt that they ought to obey it - at least they said they did - those who confessed to love Him much were in full sympathy with Him in the task He had undertaken - who worshipped Him or who professed to do so - were so taken up with their trades and professions, their money saving and pleasures, their families and circles, their religions and arguments about it, and their preparation for going to the mainland, that they did not listen to the cry that came to them from this Wonderful Being who had Himself gone down into the sea. Anyway, if they heard it they did not heed it. They did not care. And so the multitude went on right before them struggling and shrieking and drowning in the darkness.

And then I saw something that seemed to me even more strange than anything that had gone on before in this strange vision. I saw that some of these people on the platform whom this Wonderful Being had called to, wanting them to come and help Him in His difficult task of saving these perishing creatures, were always praying and crying out to Him to come to them!

Some wanted Him to come and stay with them, and spend His time and strength in making them happier. Others wanted Him to come and take away various doubts and misgivings they had concerning the truth of some letters He had written them. Some wanted Him to come and make them feel more secure on the rock - so secure that they would be quite sure that they should never slip off again into the ocean. Numbers of others wanted Him to make them feel quite certain that they would really get off the rock and onto the mainland someday: because as a matter of fact, it was well known that some had walked so carelessly as to loose their footing, and had fallen back again into the stormy waters.

So these people used to meet and get up as high on the rock as they could, and looking towards the mainland (where they thought the Great Being was) they would cry out, "Come to us! Come and help us!" And all the while He was down (by His Spirit) among the poor struggling, drowning creatures in the angry deep, with His arms around them trying to drag them out, and looking up - oh! so longingly but all in vain - to those on the rock, crying to them with His voice all hoarse from calling, "Come to Me! Come, and help Me!

And then I understood it all. It was plain enough. The sea was the ocean of life - the sea of real, actual human existence. That lightening was the gleaming of piercing truth coming from Jehovah’s Throne. That thunder was the distant echoing of the wrath of God. Those multitudes of people shrieking, struggling and agonizing in the stormy sea, was the thousands and thousands of poor harlots and harlot-makers, of drunkards and drunkard makers, of thieves, liars, blasphemers and ungodly people of every kindred, tongue and nation.

Oh what a black sea it was! And oh, what multitudes of rich and poor, ignorant and educated were there. They were all so unalike in their outward circumstances and conditions, yet all alike in one thing - all sinners before God - all held by, and holding onto, some iniquity, fascinated by some idol, the slaves of some devilish lust, and ruled by the foul fiend from the bottomless pit!

"All alike in one thing?" No, all alike in two things - not only the same in their wickedness but, unless rescued, the same in their sinking, sinking . . . down, down, down . . . to the same terrible doom. That great sheltering rock represented Calvary, the place where Jesus had died for them. And the people on it were those who had been rescued. The way they used their energies, gifts and time represented the occupations and amusements of those who professed to be saved from sin and hell - followers of the Lord Jesus Christ. The handful of fierce, determined ones, who were risking their own lives in saving the perishing were true soldiers of the cross of Jesus. That Mighty Being who was calling to them from the midst of the angry waters was the Son of God, "the same yesterday, today and forever" who is still struggling and interceding to save the dying multitudes about us from this terrible doom of damnation, and whose voice can be heard above the music, machinery, and noise of life, calling on the rescued to come and help Him save the world.

My friends in Christ, you are rescued from the waters, you are on the rock, He is in the dark sea calling on you to come to Him and help Him. Will you go? Look for yourselves. The surging sea of life, crowded with perishing multitudes rolls up to the very spot on which you stand. Leaving the vision, I now come to speak of the fact - a fact that is as real as the Bible, as real as the Christ who hung upon the cross, as real as the judgment day will be, and as real as the heaven and hell that will follow it.

Look! Don’t be deceived by appearances - men and things are not what they seem. All who are not on the rock are in the sea! Look at them from the standpoint of the great White Throne, and what a sight you have! Jesus Christ, the Son of God is, through His Spirit, in the midst of this dying multitude, struggling to save them. And He is calling on you to jump into the sea - to go right away to His side and help Him in the holy strife. Will you jump? That is, will you go to His feet and place yourself absolutely at His disposal?

A young Christian once came to me, and told me that for some time she had been giving the Lord her profession and prayers and money, but now she wanted to give Him her life. She wanted to go right into the fight. In other words, she wanted to go to His assistance in the sea. As when a man from the shore, seeing another struggling in the water, takes off those outer garments that would hinder his efforts and leaps to the rescue, so will you who still linger on the bank, thinking and singing and praying about the poor perishing souls, lay aside your shame, your pride, your cares about other people’s opinions, your love of ease and all the selfish loves that have kept you back for so long, and rush to the rescue of this multitude of dying men and women.

Does the surging sea look dark and dangerous? Unquestionably it is so. There is no doubt that the leap for you, as for everyone who takes it, means difficulty and scorn and suffering. For you it may mean more than this. It may mean death. He who beckons you from the sea however, knows what it will mean - and knowing, He still calls to you and bids to you to come.

You must do it! You cannot hold back. You have enjoyed yourself in Christianity long enough. You have had pleasant feelings, pleasant songs, pleasant meetings, pleasant prospects. There has been much of human happiness, much clapping of hands and shouting of praises - very much of heaven on earth.

Now then, go to God and tell Him you are prepared as much as necessary to turn your back upon it all, and that you are willing to spend the rest of your days struggling in the midst of these perishing multitudes, whatever it may cost you.

You must do it. With the light that is now broken in upon your mind and the call that is now sounding in your ears, and the beckoning hands that are now before your eyes, you have no alternative. To go down among the perishing crowds is your duty. Your happiness from now on will consist in sharing their misery, your ease in sharing their pain, your crown in helping them to bear their cross, and your heaven in going into the very jaws of hell to rescue them.

Now what will you do?

Religion Saves (and Nine other Misconceptions)

2009-08-07T21:20:00.000-07:00

Religion Saves.

Religion Saves!

Religion Saves...?

No matter which way you say that phrase...this is a great book for every member of the body of Christ. While I have to admit that I skimmed through a few sections of the book (birth control, dating...ect...I'm married and know quite a bit about birth control...although some argue that we don't! ha!)...what was I saying...? Ah yes...although, I didn't read every single page I can definitly say this is a book that should be on everyone's shelf.

Before I start with my review of this book...here is an official review of the book and some helpful links:

Religion Saves:
And Nine Other Misconceptions

After 343,203 online votes on the Mars Hill Church website, nine questions for
Pastor Mark Driscoll emerged as the ones most urgently calling for answers.

Inspired by 1 Corinthians, in which Paul answers a series of questions
posed by the people in the Corinthian church, Pastor Mark Driscoll set out to
determine the most controversial questions among visitors to the Mars Hill
Church website. In the end, 893 questions were asked and 343,203 votes were
cast. The top nine questions are now each answered in a chapter of Religion
Saves.

After an introductory chapter devoted to the misconception that
religion is what saves us, Driscoll tackles nine issues: birth control, humor,
predestination, grace, sexual sin, faith and works, dating, the emerging church,
and the regulative principle. Because the purpose of this book is to address
commonly asked questions, all readers will find relevant, engaging material,
written in Driscoll's distinctively edgy, yet theologically sound style.

In his distinctively edgy, yet theologically sound style, Pastor Mark
Driscoll addresses the nine most controversial questions posed by visitors to
the Mars Hill Church website. This book is part of the Re:Lit series.

Link to buy the book: http://www.amazon.com/Religion-Saves-Nine-Other-Misconceptions/dp/1433506165/ref=sprightly-20

About the author: Meet Pastor Mark!
Mark Driscoll
is the founding pastor of Mars Hill Church in Seattle,
one of the fastest-growing churches in America . He is president of the Acts 29 Church Planting Network and is the author of several
books, including Vintage Jesus.

Pastor Mark preaches on Sunday,
trains pastors, and writes curriculum. Mark is married to his high school
sweetheart, Grace, and they enjoy raising their three sons and two daughters. More about Mark here!

Link to read and/or listen to an excerpt:
http://relit.org/religionsaves

Here are other bloggers who put up a review of this book...please
check out these great bloggers - I found a few new favorites!! http://www.litfusegroup.com/latest/current-blog-tours/86-blog-tour-for-religion-saves-by-mark-driscoll

********************************************

Now for my take...while I didn't find this book to be an easy read, simply because of his style of writing, I did find it hard to put down. Each chapter is broken into highly debated issues in our culture today...and each topic impacts the body of Christ and forces us to seek God for the answer.

The topics are: birth control, humor, predestination, grace, sexual sin, faith and works, dating, the emerging church, and the regulative principle.

While many of us tend to mostly seek answers from God in prayer, we should all hope to find ourselves with our noses in the Bible...seeking out the answers that lay before us. Mark Driscoll is a man who loves his Bible and he sets a great example for us...the answers that he provides are all backed up with research and scripture.

One thing I did NOT expect from this book is for it to be so researched out. At some points I felt it was a little bit too much history...a little bit too much theology...but then I realized that's just my personality. While I know it offers some insights and MANY people love history and explanations such as this...that part just wasn't for me. By looking at the cover you wouldn't think it would serve as such a stronglly founded research material...but it really delivers! This guy did his homework!

While I can not say I agreed with him on every point I will say that I found his chapter on "Humor" to be specifically helpful. I have always known that there is a line to be drawn in regards to humor and joking around in the Christian walk...but where? Mark does a very good job of drawing a line for us and helping us to see what belongs in our lives and what does not.

Of all the questions posed in this book I found the chapter on "The Emerging Church" to be the most interesting. Throughout the whole chapter he is very compassionate where it is due and practices tough love at the same time. I found it very inspiring...but not nearly as inspiring as his chapter on Dating...

Even though I skimmed this chapter...what I did read struck me to my core. My children are not yet old enough to date...they are only 7, 3 and 1...but when he began to speak of the experiences with his little girls and how his family is going to practice courtship...my heart fluttered. This chapter made me want to stand up and throw my fist in the air and let out a huge "YEAH!" for men of God everywhere. It encourages me so much to read when men of God are taking a stand and making a difference...beginning in their own family. The chapter on Dating was very inspiring for me...and gave me a lot to think about...now...if only he would come out with a book that details what Courting is and what it looks like...

When I say the phrase "Regulative Principle" what come to mind? .......if you're like me....absolutly nothing will come to your mind. When I got the end I expected some big shocking topic and I found the "Regulative Principle"...what?!?!? As I began reading I found out that there is a hot topic out there that I knew nothing about but that I had actually discussed in some form with friends at different times. But I had no idea it had a name...and different theories and stances!??!

I'm going to leave you with this teaser: "Regulative Principle" is a topic that really affects my generation. I have sat in church sometimes and wrestled with myself and God about this very topic...I have to say that Mark offered a very good solution...his over all cry on this topic was unity. Oh that we would have unity!!

Click here to buy Religion Saves.

"From Eternity to Here" by Frank Viola

2009-07-21T14:44:00.000-07:00

Have you ever listened to a story being told and as you are listening…it is as though you are no longer in reality but caught away in the world of the words being spoken? I have…and as I read “From Eternity to Here” by Frank Viola I found myself continuously being taken away…but the best part about being taken away in to the world of these words is that it’s real! It’s not stepping away from reality but stepping into reality.

Hey guys…I know it’s been a long time since I’ve posted but I figured what better way than to share with you about a great book that I have the blessing to be able to read and review. I was approached by the publishing company that put out one of my absolute FAVORITE books “Crazy Love” by Francis Chan to read and review a follow up book that they are releasing.

I really didn’t know what to expect but as my dead line to write this review crept closer and closer…I found it harder and harder to find time to read it. Having three kids, homeschooling and helping out at a daycare part time has left me with little to no time. Most of the past week I’ve been thinking – “What have I got myself into…I have to keep my word…what are they going to do if I don’t write the review…come bang on my door and rip the book from my hands??”

I honestly started today out and had only read 1 chapter…but as I read that first chapter I was totally over taken by the goodness of what I was reading. It’s so raw and so real and so sincere that as you read this book it is as though you are reading your own love story…and that’s because you are.

This book is set up in a way that it paints our love story with God from Genesis to Revelation. This book contains three volumes: the Bride of Christ, the House of God, and the Family of God the Body of Christ. When I first read the titles of the sections I was kind of detached and wasn’t really encouraged to read much but as I dove in I realized that what Frank Viola has done…is given the body of Christ a beautiful gift…A gift that opens the eyes of those who can’t quite see the whole picture of what it means to be the Bride of Christ.

He weaves together the story of all stories…in a digestible (if not uncomfortable at times) way. While I did really enjoy the first and middle part of the book the part that struck me the MOST was the end. After reading the end I felt as though I had been standing underneath a waterfall of truth. My heart was encouraged and spurred on with passion for my God…and in awe that someone was saying exactly what my spirit is screaming out but without words to express it effectively.

In the next to last chapter Frank Viola once again pulls out his pen/paintbrush to help us see what it looks like when the body of Christ is walking in truth…

“In this chapter, I would briefly like to explore the practical question of what it looks like when a local assembly fulfills what God is after and His eternal purpose moves from eternity to here. “
He summarizes this chapter toward the end…and I will leave you with that summary because I believe it will cause you to want to know what he has to say about each of these things that are vital for the church to live out “the ageless purpose of God”…

“So how does a local church carry out the ageless purpose of God? Very simply: by loving the Lord Jesus as His bride and learning to live by His indwelling life. By edifying its members through displaying the Lord Jesus as functioning priests in God’s house and as participating members of Christ’s body. By living a shared life as the family of God, visibly demonstrating what the kingdom of God is like to a broken world. And by expressing God’s image and exercising His authority in the earth – the very things that the first Adam was charged to do in the garden.”

Frank Viola’s book “From Eternity to Here” is a true find…and I am very blessed by his book – I know I will be rereading this book throughout the rest of my life to enable myself never to lose sight of the whole masterpiece that is my love story with God…

I will leave you with one more fantastic quote:

“Every love story that the minds of mortal men and women construct, every love story that has made its appearance in the pages of human history – whether fiction or nonfiction – is but a reflection , a pale image, a faint portrait, a scrambled version of the sacred romance of the ages.”

Thank you Frank Viola and David C Cook publishers!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The following bloggers are posting a review or Q & A with Frank Viola on his bestselling book FROM ETERNITY TO HERE today, Tuesday, July 21st. You may order the book at a discount at http://www.frometernitytohere.org/ – it’s also on audio book. Free discussion guide, sample chapters, interviews, and a free audio of the first chapter are available on that site also. Here are the bloggers who are participating:

Jay Becker - http://www.jaybecker.org/

Mark D - http://deadmanstravelog.blogspot.com/

Igniting Hearts - Kimber Britner - http://www.ignitinghearts.blogspot.com/

Karyn - http://tiger-kar.blogspot.com/

Barefoot Preacher - http://thebarefootpreacher.blogspot.com/

Every Day Angels - http://www.weareeverydayangels.com/

FaithEngineer - http://www.faithengineer.com/

Kristen Schiffman - http://dancinginthemargins.typepad.com/

CrossPointe: The Church at Bevo - http://churchatbevo.blogspot.com/

Crazy Love for God - crazyloveforgod.blogspot.com

Amazima Ministries - oatsvallteam.blogspot.com

Down to Write Honest - http://downwritehonest.com/

A Beautiful Mess - http://blnorth1105.blogspot.com/

The Blakes on a Mission - http://www.theblakesthailand.blogspot.com/

Words by Jud Kossum - http://judkossum.blogspot.com/

Eric Jaffe - http://www.ericjaffe.org/

Reconnect with God – http://www.reconnectwithgod.org/

2nd Cup of Coffee - http://www.2nd-cup-of-coffee.blogspot.com/

Nolan Bobbitt Website - http://www.nolanbobbitt.com/

Klappyanne - www.xanga.com/klappyanne

Daveingland - http://www.daveingland.com/

Randi Jo Rooks - http://seedsinmyheart.blogspot.com/

Ephesians Five – http://ephesiansonefive.blogspot.com/

Michael Bayne - http://www.michaelbayne.net/

Encounter Church Helena Blog - encounterhelena.org

Thoughts B4 Conviction N2 Action - tsharrison.blogspot.com

Edevotion - http://www.e-devotion.blogspot.com/

Seeking After - http://seekingafter.blogspot.com/

Eric Powell - http://www.encounterhelena.org/

Borrowed Light - http://fbcnewlondon.blogspot.com/

Anxious for nothing...

2009-07-04T06:44:00.000-07:00

Wow...it's the fourth of July! Today I woke up with tension in my neck...you know when you don't sleep well apparently and your neck feels like you were clenched up all night long? As I sat there feeding Jossalyn this morning I realized that I was still tensed up!! I even was tensing up my feet as I sat there!

I just let out a quiet prayer of helplessness "God...What is it? Why am I so tense? Give me your peace...help me to relax..." As I started working on being conscious of how I was sitting and if each muscle was tensed up...letting them loosen and so on....I realized that I am anxious.

Usually physical symptoms such as these, with me, are a sign of something going on inside. If my mind and heart are busy with something then my physical body reflects it...of course. So while I was trying to loosen up and the thought of getting more sleep and exercising more crossed my mind...those are only surface fixes.

The truth is...I'm anxious! Anxious about what? Well...that's a good question...so as I seek the Lord this morning...as to not be anxious for anything and to trust Him with every situation...I pray that you too are anxious for nothing and trust Him with everything...

Loving where you are!

2009-07-02T04:51:00.000-07:00

Hello all of you who still check back here every once in a while! Bless you! I know I've been a horrible blogger since returning to the states...and at this point...I can't say that that is going to change. Things have been so busy and I've been filling in at a daycare when they need me and I have been unable to make the time.

I love blogging and so my attempts will not cease!!! I am fixing to write two book reviews that I signed up for...hahaha!!! I don't know when I am going to READ those book but I am...so be patient with me as I sort out the demands of our current situation and trust God to continue to move in us and work through us....

Here is what I was blessed with this morning! PEACE THAT PASSES ALL UNDERSTANDING - no matter where you are...do you have it? Get some from the source...it's like the fountain of happiness and youth! :)

________________________________

May God Give Us Success in All We Do
by Rick Warren

"May the favor of the Lord our God rest upon us; establish the work of our hands for us—yes, establish the work of our hands" (Psalm 90:17 NIV).

God establishes the work of our hands by giving us gifts that will make a difference in the lives of others. That's what success is—being what God meant for you to be. Jesus said, "My purpose is to give [you] a rich and satisfying life" (John 10:10 NLT).

You may be thinking, "Well, Rick, what about work that needs to be done but doesn't express my gifts; it just has to be done?" Any homemaker knows exactly what I'm talking about. I would say to you that every job, even the one you are suited for, has mundane parts. Every job has some parts to it that you won't like, but you can still worship God through those parts of the job.

And I would suggest you adopt this attitude: "Maybe this job that I'm in right now is a phase of my life and I'm not going to be here the rest of my life. But this is where I am for now; therefore, I will worship God right now."

The apostle Paul says, "Take your everyday, ordinary life—your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life—and place it before God as an offering" (Romans 12:1 MSG)."Lord our God, may your blessings be with us. Give us success in all we do!" (Psalm 90:17 TEV).

2009-06-29T12:46:00.000-07:00

OK...Let's try this again...

2009-06-07T06:15:00.001-07:00

Off to church we go! I am expectant...and ready...and not gonna allow any preconceived ideas to limit what I received from God this morning! Menorah or no menorah...I'm ready!

OH...hahaha...

2009-05-31T20:35:00.000-07:00

One of the images I used in my post came from this very APPROPRIATE article:

How to get the most out of a sermon...

Bored in church...

2009-05-31T20:06:00.000-07:00

My physical body is sooo tired from today I almost feel as though I'm sleeping while awake? LOL...so excuse me if this post is a bit...uhh...zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz....what? Oh...uh...what was I saying? :)

I had a wonderful day today although it started out a little rough. Have you ever had one of those days when you go to church and you can't sit still and you feel like you would rather be anywhere else than listening to the message you are sitting in? (oh come on...you know you have!!!!!! at least once? Ok...so your a saint...)

Well, while I don't think I can say I would rather have been anywhere but there...I really was totally frustrated with the message. It was about the Minorah and its symbolism and representation of the body of Christ and...ect...ect...and yes my attitude was horrible. And I apologize to those of you who love all that stuff but usually...while I know there is a lot to be learned from it...I have never been into all the different feasts...and all that stuff...or church history. I wish I was...but it is so hard for me to focus in on and really give it my all. I know it probably shouldn't...now start talking to me about revival and missions and church planting and Paul's life...ect...and I'm all EARS!

Even when Beth Moore dishes it up...I usually find myself tuning out. We missed worship because we were so slow moving this morning but I was so ready for church...so ready...and then as we walked in and I started listening I just got so antsy...

I read the bulletin like 5 times...played with my shoe...sat on the floor - yes I actually sat on the floor...we were in the back so I could...tugged on John's foot a few times...all the while listening...and being frustrated....ready to go. (acting like a child in truth) I just kept looking up at John and was thinking...honestly...I wonder what he's thinking if I'm feeling like this...

So when it was all said and done with I was like "Man! That was hard to sit through..." and I expected him to share about how he felt the same way and then go on to discuss what it was exactly that made me feel that way...but...(record scratch)...He enjoyed it! It was a very good solid teaching he said...I said "What?!?"

I thought back on what he had shared...and I was like...what's the deal. I was bored to tears...I was longing for something to stir my spirit...call me to battle...rattle my cage...

I had an epiphany while sitting there after his message was over...I was worshipping and opened my eyes to see many people still sitting down...they had made their chairs their alters and some were hugging each other...some where crying and some were standing with their hands outstretched worshipping God as though no one else was in the room...what did I miss?

I kept thinking...that wasn't a moving message. Or was it? After I walked away from service I felt like I had been cheated...my heart was not in the right place and because I prejudged the message because it was about a Jewish symbol and figured I knew where it was going...I missed a blessing. I went so hungry too...or was I? I felt like I was expectant and so ready to hear from God since I hadn't had my time with him in like 2 days...and then there I was...still hungry for the word of God.

So afterward we had a birthday party to go to and it was so much fun. Some dear friends of mine's little daughter was turning 3...we went and had a great time. We didn't get home until late and so after making dinner...cleaning and putting the boys to bed I sat down...still hungry...although my tummy was full...

I received a message from a dear friend who shared a scripture that God had pointed her to and spoke into her life through and so I went and read that chapter and man...the word of God is like living waters...just as the Bible says. Our God is so incredible and so wonderful...and His Word is so alive and real. I want to leave you with that chapter...be blessed and seek God with all that you are!

Galatians 5
Freedom in Christ
1It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery.

2Mark my words! I, Paul, tell you that if you let yourselves be circumcised, Christ will be of no value to you at all. 3Again I declare to every man who lets himself be circumcised that he is obligated to obey the whole law. 4You who are trying to be justified by law have been alienated from Christ; you have fallen away from grace. 5But by faith we eagerly await through the Spirit the righteousness for which we hope. 6For in Christ Jesus neither circumcision nor uncircumcision has any value. The only thing that counts is faith expressing itself through love.

7You were running a good race. Who cut in on you and kept you from obeying the truth? 8That kind of persuasion does not come from the one who calls you. 9"A little yeast works through the whole batch of dough." 10I am confident in the Lord that you will take no other view. The one who is throwing you into confusion will pay the penalty, whoever he may be. 11Brothers, if I am still preaching circumcision, why am I still being persecuted? In that case the offense of the cross has been abolished. 12As for those agitators, I wish they would go the whole way and emasculate themselves!

13You, my brothers, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the sinful nature[a]; rather, serve one another in love. 14The entire law is summed up in a single command: "Love your neighbor as yourself."[b] 15If you keep on biting and devouring each other, watch out or you will be destroyed by each other.

Life by the Spirit
16So I say, live by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the sinful nature. 17For the sinful nature desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the sinful nature. They are in conflict with each other, so that you do not do what you want. 18But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under law.

19The acts of the sinful nature are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; 20idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions 21and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God.

22But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. 24Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the sinful nature with its passions and desires. 25Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit. 26Let us not become conceited, provoking and envying each other.

hello...

2009-05-30T21:16:00.001-07:00

The reason I haven't been blogging is really kind of fuzzy to me. I've been trying to figure out what has been keeping me from it and it really comes down to a few things. Lack of time is one...but not the biggest factor. I suppose I really do feel like I don't have that much to write that anyone would be interested in. Once I realized that I was quite frustrated with myself because...well...

Blogging for me has never really been about pleasing everyone else...it was about sharing and having a place to share my heart and what God is doing in and through our lives...regardless of if there are many readers or 1 (me). So while I feel insecure that I won't have as great of posts as when we were in Thailand and I feel like, at times, that we don't have as much value (totally a lie from the enemy) I will keep writing just for the pure joy and fun of it.

Life is anything but boring since returning from Thailand...it's fast...it's beautiful...and it's hard at times. There are days were I really do long for Thailand and a missionary's life...no central heat/air and all! And then there are days when I thank God...literally...that I can run down the street to Wal-Mart and witness to someone in ENGLISH! ;)

But I think the biggest thing that God has been really teaching me over the past few months is just to trust in Him. It seems like that is a continual lesson in my life...I just keep getting to deeper levels of trust each time. This time it's trusting Him even now...even now when my friends are a drive away...when there's a church on every corner...when my days are so much easier in some ways...

Even now...I just read a book called Even Now...and while I didn't mean to bring that into what I was saying...there it is. Even Now is a book by Karen Kingsbury and it was an incredible read...so much so that I finished it in 3 days...and kept my house clean, kids homeschooled and didn't lose it! hehehee...good book...

The kids are doing wonderful...Josiah is like a bright shining light...sometimes the light is blinding because he's going a million miles an hour and sometimes he is a steady glow that is absolutly mesmorizing...Jude is such a unique individual...and so sweet. He's so unique infact that I know of about 10 people that mimick his phrases in their everday life...NORMALLY!

And Jossalyn...oh the beauty that is Jossalyn. She's just stunning to me...and so full of joy - but her red headedness is really starting to shine through. Just yesterday I heard her screaming from her brothers room and then she would stop and then start screaming again. I thought her brothers were giving her a hard time and I went in to see what they were doing and I found Jossalyn sitting against the wall with a MagnaDoodle.

You know the little board things with the magnetic pen? Well, she's sitting there drawing on it and then she goes to part of the board where the string that is attached to the pen won't let her reach and she starts screaming and turning red while staring at the string and yanking at it!!!! I couldn't believe it...I watched her for a minute just to see if that was really what was happening and sure enough...she was mad and frustrated with the string!!!

John has been home since the Indonesia/Malaysia trip working very hard everyday at the JGLM headquarters. He will be heading off to Colorado next...I think. I've been thinking a lot about missionaries and praying for the ones I know and my heart is really moved for them. I wish I was wonderful at making videos so I could paint a picture for you to understand missionary life. But the truth is...you may be able to get a little bit of the picture but until you've walked it out then there is no knowing it...

And when you have that understanding it brings about a patriotic feeling. I know that word is used for your country...but it really describes the feelings I feel when I think about the missionaries serving and giving their lives to live their lives before men and be soldiers for the Lord on foreign soil. I want so badly to prepare love boxes to send them...and shower them with the love that they deserve in all aspects...gifts...money...prayer...being there...

I am praying that God allows me to find a way while we are here to bless them greatly. If you know of missionaries that your church supports or that you really appreciate...send them a letter...or an email and tell them. Put together a care package...even if it's small and show them you love them by sending it to them...and best of all...pray for them!!!!

Our God is so great and so wonderful...it is an honor to serve Him...in America or on foreign soil...so until next time...night night...

A real post is coming soon...

2009-05-29T22:01:00.001-07:00

Late Sleeper's Anonymous

2009-05-03T11:39:00.000-07:00

Hello. My name is Stephanie and I am a closet late sleeper and I'm coming out!!!

You know that feeling when it feels like the most comfortable thing in the entire world is your bed???? Well, it felt that way as I rolled out of bed this morning at 7:30 in the morning...as I walked away it felt like the bed was literally drawing me back to it...but little Joss's smiles and laughter won.

Eventhough I was up at 7:30 this morning we did not go to church. Once it was time for her to start getting tired...at around 9:30...I laid down with her and well, the rest was history. I woke up and John had let me sleep and I slept till 1! Wow! I think it's been years since I slept till one.

I have to be honest...I'm one of THOSE people. Most of my life has been a fight to get as much sleep as I can. My body wouldn't wake up by itself unless I aquired 11+ hours a night. I'm not kidding...for me it was normal to sleep until 1 or 2pm...And when it was woken up by some other intruder...an alarm clock...ect...I felt like I was in a commatose state that was only remedied by getting back in bed.

It seriously made me late for many a church service. At one point...no joke...my phone number was posted by the phone at the church so that if someone didn't see me there they could pick up the phone and let it ring to wake me up! Pittiful huh? I am happy to say that those days are now over.

I think it's the miracle of having 3 kids that cured me...or maybe it's the change in my lifestyle habits...eitherway I'm so thankful to no longer be a slave to sleep and my bed. I do have to admit...it felt soooo good to sleep in today.

I really missed out having missed church though...I felt so discouraged yesterday evening. I mean, really discouraged. I just couldn't stop thinking about everything negative and focusing in on things I can't change or help...John just looked at me and was like...what is wrong with you as I wore my puppy dog face.

So this morning...errr...AFTERNOON! hahahaha! After I take my kids to the park to run off some of this pent up steam....I'm going to dive into his word and let my children take a nap and seek God...I desire more of him and I will not let hopelessness or the feeling I felt last night oppress me anymore.

Be blessed!!!!

PS - Anyone else out there a closet late sleeper?

Wow.

2009-05-02T18:18:00.001-07:00

Jumping BACK on the wagon

2009-04-29T07:33:00.000-07:00

It's been a long time since I have written on here and I am really sorry for that. I seem to be unable to find the time during the day although there are tons of things that God is doing and I am thinking...and I'd love to share...just trying to work on managing my time better.

A lot of new things have been happening...one specifically is me making changes in our lifes in some drastic ways. One thing I have been doing personally is that I have been exercising 5 days a week for almot a month now.

I can hardly believe I'm actually doing it...it's been easy for me right now because my sister in law added me to her membership to a gym. So instead of having to pay for a membership I pay a small fee...and I'm in! I LOVE LOVE LOVE going every morning. The first week I was a bit discouraged...even though I know muscle weighs more than fat...I rushed over to the trainer guys and insisted they tell me "just how much DOES muscle weigh...more than fat!?!" I gained 5 pounds the first week and I was workin by behind off...and eating right!

But the next week was a different story! I lost 7 pounds and 4 inches! The weight doesn't matter as much as how wonderful I feel...I have more energy and I make it through the day so much better..not to mention...when I hit the pillow...I'm OUT!

On to other things...JOhn has been back from Indonesia a while now and we are so glad to have him home. He has been hard at work everyday...in about 2 weeks we are very excited because we will be starting a Young Adult Group...well, it's not exclusivly young adults...

I've been reading through Crazy Love by Francis Chan with my sister in law and we will use that book as a basis for beginning our Young Adult Study. I am asking God for great things to happen.

While all this stuff is going on I find myself thinking of Thailand and all the missionaries that are there constantly throughout my day. I have been following a missionary couple that just went over and it is so wonderful to watch and read as they walk through the first year in Thailand...it brings up so many memories and tugs on my heart.

This is the most recent post from their blog...I highly encourage you to check them out and pray for them...they are a wonderful couple...the article he used in this post is amazing and sounds a little bit too much like a story book for most Americans...thank you Jesus for missionaries...willing to go.

"I recently read this article by a well known worker in the Northeast of Thailand named Paul DeNeui and I wanted to share it with you all. It gives a great insight into the Isaan people of Northeast Thailand and the supernatural struggles they face in coming to faith in Jesus. Take a little time to read it and enter their world with me.

Come Join the Dance by Paul DeNeui

She wasn’t someone you would notice Like so many other northeastern Thai women she wore the short haircut and sarong garments of the elderly. Usually she talked with a mouthful of betel nut which made it difficult to understand her speech. But she loved Jesus. She had a beautiful smile. She longed for worship. And she loved to dance.

Grandma Noo Pon was eighty-two when I first met her at a village Christmas celebration. There was nothing that distinguished her from so many other elderly church members. I was still a new missionary not at all sure that I wanted to get up and dance for the Lord yet. But she was up there. And there is an embarrassing custom here when people dance in the circle of seated observers. They will occasionally bow low with hand palms together to someone sitting outside. This is a silent request to come join the dance. And she invited me.

There is no polite way to say no to your elders in Thai, so up I went. I had enough of the movements down to at least do something, but I soon learned that that was not the important part. I knew dancing was not a “pair” thing. Grandma soon wandered off to another part of the circle. Nor was this a display of talent (I knew I didn’t have that). This was simply a cultural invitation to celebrate life in our Lord Jesus. When people dance they have a certain glow, the light of life.

When the dance was over and the celebration was done everyone went back to their homes. I didn’t think much of Grandma again until a couple of years later when our Thai organization received some funds to help people build toilets. Several of our elderly church members did not have a latrine or toilet to use. Grandma was one of them.

Once again, being culturally inept (this time in building toilets) I wasn’t part of the actual construction. Soon after the project was completed the problems began. The owners of the land where Grandma Noo Pon was living were upset about the location of this latrine. It had been dug without their permission. They stated that she would have to leave. After much discussion with church leaders, the land owners agreed to let Grandma stay if we moved the latrine. We re-dug the latrine.

Later we began having weekly worship at our fish farm and Grandma, living close by, was invited to come. Her health wasn’t very good but she always came. When we ate together she nibbled less than a bird. She didn’t sing but she clapped offbeat. She asked for prayer that she would be hired to harvest rice. She said if she wasn’t she wouldn’t eat.

When Grandma was eighty-six the owners of her property sold another piece of property in a busy part of Roi Et which had been their family home for several years. In typical Thai fashion the family’s old wooden house was carefully taken down board-by-board and then rebuilt on the property where Grandma Noo Pon lived. But her old shack was an eyesore. The owners wanted her out of the way. Once again she was going to be evicted.

Some of our Thai staff, with church leaders, again approached the owners and volunteered to move Grandma’s house (such as it was) off to one side. They grudgingly agreed to this. But when it came time to move her house the rotted boards collapsed. Only a few sheets of tin roofing were salvageable. When the church members began to gather boards and panels to replace the building, the owners were finally embarrassed enough to help. They donated nails and some coconut trunks (notoriously soft wood). Finally a new hut was up under a tamarind tree in the corner of the property, near the latrine. Meanwhile the old family house was going up behind all of this. I noted the large verandah that wrapped around the ground floor. There were double doors to let in cool air. The peaked roof was well above the second floor to keep the hot air up and out of the rooms. The house had plumbing and electricity and a fresh new coat of paint. It was then that I learned no one would ever live in it.

It was a life-size spirit house containing small tables for urns holding the ashes of relatives.

Old photographs of these bygone people hung on the walls. Outside the house were three small spirit houses on poles. Usually only one is placed on a property. Each day family members passed Grandma’s hut to make food offerings to the spirits of that place. To say the least Grandma was less than pleased. It was obvious to her that a spiritual battle was going on and she asked for prayer often.

I found out later that Grandma Noo Pon had done a number of things in her life. She had worked as a maid for the owners of the land on which she now lived. She had raised twelve children. She had outlived three husbands. But she had made her living finding spirit herbs, or rather digging up herbs the spirits told her to find. At a young age she began to worship the spirit of the city pillar of Roi Et. This ancient post, now completely covered with gold leaf and tied with colorful scarves, was positioned several hundred years ago when Roi Et was first established as a marker to establish distances. It was also understood to be the location of the city spirit, the powerful one who watched over the whole region. She worshiped this spirit faithfully and was promised that if she would keep up the worship the spirit would tell her where she could find powerful herbs in the forest to sell. She agreed and it worked. She found many different types of herbs, roots, leaves, and twigs to make specific herbal remedies that healed a variety of ailments.

But the price for this advice was dear. She had to be extremely careful to obey the spirit’s every instruction and heed its every whim. Each phase of the moon a new offering had to be made at the city pillar. If she did not keep up her promises she would have terrible headaches and misfortunes. She could eat only certain foods and she wore special amulets that had to be respected always and be worn certain ways. The instructions were tediously long and she felt she could never please the spirit.

Meanwhile her ability to heal increased. Her popularity grew. In addition to the herbs she could interpret dreams and ward off evil curses. She became a medium to help others with their spiritual dilemmas while at the same time losing her own soul.

One day when she was at the peak of her popularity and her misery, she had a vision of a great serpent rising from the east over the trees where she lived. As it drew nearer and loomed larger, a growing fear came over her. Then, just as it was about to devour her, she saw someone dressed in white also coming from the east. He said, “Don’t be afraid. I have come to drive out Satan.” Not knowing who this person was, she waited. But for the first time she knew to whom she was enslaved.

A short time later two of our Thai church workers moved into the house next to her place. One day they came walking toward her from the same direction as the vision she had seen. They explained who they were and what they were doing and presented her with an opportunity to accept Jesus. Immediately she did so with joy and relief.

That night she had horrible dreams. She felt demons pulling on her legs, her arms, and even on her chest. They threatened to kill her. Not knowing what else to do she called out, “Jesus, Help me!” A stream of light shone down on her and the tugging instantly stopped. That incident convinced her of the truth. The scattered spirits never came near her again. She had freedom at last.

Her spirit was now free, but she paid a heavy price for it. The owners of the property where she lived made life miserable for her. They built the spirit house there to spite her. She often asked for spiritual protection in prayer. Even though her children were all well established none would care for her as is expected in Thai society. Only one daughter, a mute, would come and stay with her from time to time. Normally this woman could say nothing or speak only in grunts, but whenever we came to pray, read the word or pick Grandma up to take her to worship this daughter would suddenly curse in fluent Thai and fly into a rage. “Don’t feed it!” she would yell to us about her mother, “Let it die!” We felt it was demonic.

In June of her last year Grandma’s health took a turn for the worse. She ate very little. She wanted to be with Jesus. Her family refused to take her to the doctor since they were eager to get rid of her. Our Thai staff helped with medicine but finally she stopped eating and drinking. She died peacefully on Sunday, September 10,1995.

At that point the family stepped in, extremely concerned that we would want to take her body away. We assured them we did not want it. We were also informed that they would take care of the funeral. None of us were invited but we went anyway. It was held at the largest Buddhist temple in Roi Et and no expenses were spared. As one Thai observed, “Thai people love the dead.”

I sat and listened to her relatives gossip. They condemned the youngest daughter for refusing to take her mother in because of Jesus (true) Another said that Grandma’s husband died when she decided to follow Christ (untrue). The eldest son noticed our group and asked us all to stand in front of the coffin for a picture. I’m sure Grandma was looking down from her dancing posture of worship in heaven and repeating what she had said so often, “The old way is never satisfied. It is greedy, always demanding more. God is not like that. Thank you God for Jesus.”

This article appeared in the Covenant Companion, February, 1998"

Blessed!

2009-04-14T11:14:00.001-07:00

I am so blessed this morning...God is just so incredible and I feel his presence surrounding me. I have been at a loss for words when I sit down to post on the blog although my mind is filled with things I want to share...how does that happen? hehehe...but I wanted to write and just let you know that John has returned from his month long trip overseas and we are SOOO glad to have him home.

The trip went wonderful and I was so encouraged by all the testimonies and the experiences they had. I'm encouraged by the testimonies that are still pouring in. Right now I am just so moved by the fact...no...HONORED and blessed by the fact that I am able to be in service to our King.

I imagine back in the olden days when Kings reigned...wait...what am I saying? They still do reign in some places...but I picture it back in the day when knights, queens and kings were apart of life...and I think about the Thai people and the pride the feel in their hearts about their king.

They do not speak against the king...or of his business. They are reverent even to photoes of the king...the great pride that they have for their king is moving...and today I am walking in the reality that I am a daughter of the King of Kings and He is the most just...the most good...the most righteous...and I am HONORED to be in His service...

Glory to God!!! My life is for you Jesus...may I lay it all down...may I continually forsake the things of this world...and my selfishness...to find more of you...may I seek you in the truth that nothing else is worth seeking when compared to your majesty. All for you King Jesus!

I wish I had been there...

2009-04-12T12:26:00.001-07:00

Sound of Music Train Station @ Yahoo! Video

Easter Song...He's RISEN!!!

2009-04-12T07:05:00.000-07:00

little ol' update

2009-04-03T07:11:00.000-07:00

Wow. So I thought I'd have all this extra time to write while John was gone in Indonesia and Malaysia but it just didn't happen! John has been gone for almost a month! We have never been apart this long and let me tell you...I don't ever want to do it again...unless God says so.

It has been suprisingly easy...and suprisingly hard at different times. I really have grown a strong respect for wifes of service men...they go months without their husbands!!! MONTHS!!! AHH!! I was speaking to one of them a few days ago and she said that I had made it through the rough part. She said that after a month you get into a routine and it's easier but that first month is the hardest...

I have to say this last week was easier...and it's true...we had found a routine...but God help us if anything upset that routine!!! LOL! Poor Joss has been sick the past few days...2 ear infections...a bad cough that the dr. called "croopie"...hehehe...and a rash across her face! Poor baby...

The boys and I thought John was coming home yesterday so I woke them up with "Daddy's coming home today!!!" and they jumped out bed like jumping beans. I wish I could get that response every morning from Josiah. But unfortunately I found out a few hours later that John wouldn't be home until today.

The boys were in the other room drawing pictures for Daddy when I found out. After I told them...Josiah cried! It about broke my heart. They are ready for Daddy to be home!!! I had so many stories to write to you but I'm afraid I have lost all but one. I'll try to post that one tomorrow.

Have you ever tried to explain the trinity to a 6 year old? VERY VERY VERY difficult...lol. Yesterday Josiah was sitting there and he said "If babies keep coming and coming...then how are we all going to end up in heaven or hell Mom? Does it just keep going and going?" I told him that the bible tells us that one day Jesus will come back...and he then asked..."well, then who will be in heaven?" and I said God and he said "But he's gonna come back Mom...how could he be in heaven and come back..." at that point I contemplated teaching him the word omnipresent...lol...but opted to say this instead "well, God is three in one. It's a little hard to understand...many adults don't even get it." He then said "but Jesus is the bestest of the three right? He's like the superhero right Mom?"

Hahaha...Jesus IS the ultimate SUPERHERO! :) I am really missing Thailand this week...I started speaking ONLY Thai to the kids while we were getting ready to go and they LOVED IT! I know this might sound weird but sometimes things are just easier said in Thai...and funner too. But as much as I am missing thailand I am so blessed to be where we are right now.

I'm excited about John's trip to Indonesia/Malaysia with his father...it sounds like it went awesome...and I can't wait to hear more. I am also excited about the opportunities God has given me to be here with my friends and family...encouraging them...as they encourage me.

I am working on a drama with a group of people at church to do this easter sunday and I had totally forgotten how much I love drama....how much of a passion it is of mine. But unfortunately...the drama that I feel like we should do...is not finished. I am horrible at choreography and that's what we need. I need someone to help figure out some sort of hand motions to music and I'm just terrible at it. But I know God will come up with something or show me what to do.

I can't wait....drama is such a powerful tool. Well, I am going to cut this pitiful post short and leave you with a quote from my bible study this morning:

"They had covered their insecurities with a blanket of sameness. The absence of a fresh encounter with God had them clutching to what they had left: the law."

Oh Lord...let me never be found clutching to lies because of the absence of your presence...I will seek you with all that I am...

Me...tonight....

2009-03-31T22:31:00.001-07:00

We moved to COLORADO!!!

2009-03-20T07:22:00.000-07:00

Colorado Street that is...hahaha! Yep...the reason for my very delayed posting is because we...er...I have been moving! John left on the 9th (his birthday) and that is the day we were able to get the electricity on in our new home. We did what we could before John left but unfortunately it wasn't that much.

God is good and I have been able to get us completely moved and the missions house is all cleaned up!!! You would not believe, or maybe you would...what God has done in providing for his children. My house is almost completely furnished and I have not had to purchase one single thing...wait...except for a floor lamp.

Two of my friends are getting married and both couples are combining house holds...and instead of having a garage sale and trying to make money...they gave their extra stuff to us!!! Between 3 friend we have a bed...dressers...a refrigerator...and more!

Then a friend called to tell me about a couch sitting on the side of the road and that they were giving it away...so we went to check it out and they had tons of stuff that they were givign away...including a school desk, an entertainment center, a huge cabinet and a WASHER!!! It works wonderfully!!! Then my other dear friend had a dryer sitting in her garage that she didn't need...

I could go on and on...I was suprised one morning by an awesome woman from our church who brought me kitchen utensils and a griddle...since I didn't have any pans!!! It was so awesome and my boys were sooo happy not to have cereal for breakfast again!! :)

This Sunday the church is throwing us a house warming party and told me to go register...I'm just in awe...I'm in awe of the body of Christ...and of how true and real God's promises are. He's so good...and faithful to provide for those who trust Him.

John is doing great in Indonesia...the first meetings had over 200 people attending and the last day John said that the worship and people were so intense it felt like the building was shaking at times...At the second set of meetings he said it was even more intense and that the church in Indonesia makes the American church look limp wristed...

After looking the pictures...I was jealous...I wish I could be there...Things are going good here. I just take everyday...situation by situation...and pray continuously. God is good and just as he is providing for my physical needs he's meeting my spiritual and emotional needs as well.

I have so much more to write but as for now...the boys have finished their late breakfast...and it's time for homeschool...hopefully I will be able to write again tonight or tomorrow...until then I want to leave you with a few quotes from an awesome book that I'm reading:

"I used to believe that in this world there are two kinds of people: natural worriers and naturally joyful people. I couldn't really help it that I was the worrying kind. I'm a problem solver, so I have to focus on things that need fixing. God can see that my intensity and anxiety are ministry related. I worry because I take His work seriously. Right? But then there's that perplexing command: "Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: REJOICE!" (Phil. 4:4). You'll notice that it doesn't end with "...unless you're doing something extremely important." No, it's a command for all of us and it follows with the charge, "Do not be anxious about anything" (v.6)

Worry implies that we don't quite trust that God is big enough, powerful enough, or loving enough to take care of what's happening in our lives. Stress says that the things we are involved in are important enough to merit our impatience, our lack of grace toward others, or our tight grip on control. Basically, these two behaviors communicate that it's okay to sin and not trust God because the stuff in my life is somehow exceptional. Both worry and stress reek of arrogance."

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I saw the posperity of the wicked...Surely in vain have I kept my heart pure....When I tried to understand all this, it was oppressive to me till I entered the sanctuary of God. (ps. 72:2, 13, 16-17).
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"The point of your life is to point to Him."
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A.W. Tozer "A man by his sin may waste himself, which is to waste that which on earth is most like God. This is man's greatest tragedy and God's heaviest grief."
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I love this book! It's called CRAZY LOVE by Francis Chan...it's a must read! And it's only about 11 dollars! It even refers you to videos online that go along with the book. It's awesome...Well, be blessed today and check back soon for a story about a dead bird.

Made my day...

2009-03-13T19:04:00.000-07:00

Bird Shakes His Tailfeather @ Yahoo! Video

Quickie...

2009-03-06T05:38:00.000-08:00

I have so much to update you one but I have 20 minutes to get my kids ready and out the door...so it's not going to happen this morning - but one of the best things to update you on is: WE FOUND A HOUSE TO RENT AND SIGNED THE LEASE!!! We are staying in Sherman for at least a year!!!

So family and friend...beware...the Blakes are here to stay...for a year. :) Yayee!! I'm sooo excited! I'll leave you with my devotional from purposedrivenlife.com for today... :)
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Serving from the Heart
by Rick Warren

From now on if you listen obediently to the commandments that I am commanding you today, love God, your God, and serve him with everything you have within you, he'll take charge of sending the rain at the right time .... Deuteronomy 11:13-14 (MSG)

*** *** *** ***

Repeatedly, the Bible says to "serve the Lord with all your heart." God wants you to serve him passionately, not dutifully. People rarely excel at tasks they don't enjoy doing or feel passionate about. God wants you to use your natural interests to serve him and others.

How do you know when you're serving God from your heart?

The first telltale sign is enthusiasm. When you're doing what you love to do, no one has to motivate you, or challenge you, or check up on you. You do it for the sheer enjoyment. You don't need rewards, or applause, or to be paid, because you love serving in this way.

The opposite is also true: When you don't have a heart for what you're doing, you're easily discouraged.

One characteristic of serving God from your heart is effectiveness: whenever you do what God wired you to love to do, you get good at it. Passion drives perfection. If you don't care about a task, it is unlikely that you'll excel at it.

On the other hand, the highest achievers in any field are those who do it because of passion, not duty or profit.

We've all heard people say, "I took a job I hate in order to make a lot of money, so someday I can quit and do what I love to do." That's a big mistake. Don't waste your life in a job that doesn't express your heart.

Remember, the greatest things in life are not things. Meaning is far more important than money. The richest man in the world once said, "A simple life in the fear-of-God is better than a rich life with a ton of headaches" (Proverbs 15:16 MSG).

Don't settle for achieving "the good life," because the good life is not good enough. Ultimately, it doesn't satisfy. You can have a lot to live on, and still have nothing to live for. Aim instead for "the better life" - serving God in a way that expresses your heart.

Figure out what you love to do - that which God gave you a heart for - and then do it for his glory!

Who's in the seat?

2009-03-04T21:09:00.001-08:00

Prophecy - Chosen

2009-03-03T12:50:00.000-08:00

Laminin...a MUST SEE!

2009-03-02T09:49:00.000-08:00

Hey everyone...

For the next few days I am going to be posting incredible videos...please...take the time and watch them...and be blessed and drawn closer to Him...

THANK YOU JESUS!

Renewing Your Mind

2009-02-27T06:19:00.000-08:00

You know, I almost feel bad for always posting someone else's stuff this week but I love things that are simple and to the point and right to the heart...and this is the best daily devotional I've ever signed up for. Almost every morning it's THIS GOOD...simple...and pointing you to Jesus. Thank you Rick Warren for these wonderful daily devotionals!

I have been wanting to write...I have a few things I want to share but I have been overcome......totally overcome......by.................ALLERGIES! I've never had allergies in my entire life...I never understood but oh boy do I now. Yesterday I was all but wiped out and unable to function. My poor boys...my eyes were on fire all day long and the kind of red that makes you wonder if I hadn't done some serious drugs...eye drops didn't help...benadryl didn't help.

Yes...that is a picture of someone with conjunctivitis...and no, I didn't have pink eye...but that's how red my eyes were...but worse around the eye...I rubbed my eyes so much because of the itching and burning that the skin around my eyes was bright red too!

I think I used ANOTHER whole box of kleenex yesterday and I counted at least 40+ sneezes....oh the misery....

As I stumbled through my day...I developed compassion for the allergy inclinde....and I realized by the end of the day I owed my boys a big apology. Man...it was a hard day. I kept praying and trying to get in the word any spare moment because besides the physical torment everytime the boys fought AGAIN I felt my blood boil.

I really believe this specific devotional is for me today...in more than just one way. But specifically the auto pilot that I am in with my children...when they act up I almost default to this thinking that they are doing it on purpose...hardly leaving room for them to just be children. I know they aren't doing it on purpose to spite me...at least not yet! I know this!

But when Josiah aggrivates his brother for the 100th time and I hear that high pitched squeel of frustration and anger...I could just hit the roof! I feel like it's such disobedience and my thoughts of training up a child in the way he should go and all of my training in having "the end result" in mind in my discipline...go right out the window....sometimes screaming in fear!

LOL...I'm not THAT bad...but I won't pretend like I don't loose it cause I DO! My boys fight more than I ever thought kids could fight. I don't know if it's their ages...that they are both strong willed....or if it's like most people tell me: they are just boys! Whatever it is...my frustration and reaction is not their problem...IT'S MINE! I have to allow God to have all parts of me and all parts of my day. Without that all hope is lost for a sane mommy all day long.

I'm sorry if this sounds extreme...and I know some women who take care of 4+ children and don't seem to have this problem. But I do...and one day...if God allows me too and when I get through this...I'm going to write a book called "HELP! I want to abuse my children!" or "Motherhood...when your just not cut out!"

Do I abuse my children...? For the record...NO! Of course not...and the minute it ever came to that point I would seek serious help...do I feel not cut out for motherhood...sometimes...but what mother doesn't?

I'm sure there will be many times when I don't feel like I have what it takes but God doesn't put anything on you that you can't handle and I know God gave me my children. I am the mother of Josiah, Jude and Jossalyn and I have been chosen as their mother, with all my gifts and issues considered. AND I KNOW they are very strong...wonderful...unique...little people and I will cling to God and allow him to change my heart so I can be the best Mommy I can be to them. Jesus help me...help me truly repent and raise my children as you would have me to.

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Discipleship: Renewing Your Mind

by Rick Warren

Be careful how you think; your life is shaped by your thoughts. Proverbs 4:23 *** *** *** ***

To change your life, you must change the way you think. Behind everything you do is a thought. Every behavior is motivated by a belief, and every action is prompted by an attitude.
God revealed this thousands of years before psychologists understood it: "Be careful how you think; your life is shaped by your thoughts" (Proverbs 4:23 TEV).

Imagine riding in a speedboat on a lake with an automatic pilot set to go east. If you decide to reverse course and head west, you have two possible ways to change the boat's direction.

One way is to grab the steering wheel and physically force it to head in the opposite direction from where the autopilot is programmed to go. By sheer willpower, you could overcome the autopilot, but you'd feel constant resistance. Your arms would eventually tire of the stress, you'd let go of the steering wheel, and the boat would instantly head back east, the way it was internally programmed.

This is what happens when you try to change you life with willpower; you say, "I'll force myself to eat less ... stop smoking ... quit being disorganized and late."

And, yes, willpower can produce short-term change, but it creates constant internal stress because you haven't dealt with the root cause. The change doesn't feel natural. Eventually you give up and go off the diet.

There is a better and easier way: Change your autopilot; in other words, the way you think. "Let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think" (Romans 12:2 NLT).

Change always starts first in the mind. The way you think determines the way you feel, and the way you feel influences the way you act, which means "there must be a spiritual renewal of your thoughts and attitudes" (Ephesians 4:23 NLT).

To be like Christ you must develop the mind of Christ. The New Testament calls this mental shift "repentance," which in Greek literally means "to change your mind."

To repent means to change the way you think - about God, yourself, sin, other people, life, your future, and everything else, and you adopt Christ's outlook and perspective on life.

Spiritual Growth Is a Collaborative Effort

2009-02-26T09:55:00.000-08:00

Rick Warren did a great job explaining this so I thought I would repost it:

Spiritual Growth Is a Collaborative Effort

by Rick Warren

Continue to work out your salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you to will and to act according to his good purpose. Philippians 2:12-13 (NIV)

*** *** *** ***

Once you decide to get serious about becoming like Christ, you must begin to act in new ways. You'll need to let go of some old routines, develop some new habits, and intentionally change the way you think.

The verse above shows the two parts of spiritual growth: "work out" and "work in."The "work out" is your responsibility and the "work in" is God's role.Spiritual growth is a collaborative effort between you and the Holy Spirit. God's Spirit works with us, not just in us.

This verse, written to believers, is not about how to be saved, but how to grow. It doesn't say "work for" your salvation, because you can't add anything to what Jesus already did!

For example, during a physical workout, you exercise to develop your body, not to get a body. When you work out a puzzle, you already have all the pieces – your task is to put the pieces together. Farmers work the land, not to get land, but to develop what they already have.

God has given you a new life; now you're responsible to develop it "with fear and trembling." That means to take your spiritual growth seriously, because it will determine your role in eternity. When people are casual about their growth in Christlikeness, it shows they don't understand the implications.

For fun...

2009-02-18T09:47:00.001-08:00

Validation, Malaysia, Prayer Requests...

2009-02-16T21:25:00.000-08:00

It's been a while since I've written. While God is still the Lord of my life I found myself struggling with a few of the things I thought I was over. We're here in America...and I can honestly say my heart is here now...it's here...content in what God has planned and as much as I hate to add a "but" to that...I must say...

BUT I struggle with viewing ourselves as missionaries to America. I know that's how we returned...and no we're not through a mission board but we're on God's mission board...and the big man said go back to America...but yet as a dear Pastor friend gave us their support for us as missionaries in America I felt as though we weren't qualified or worth them giving into us. Our dear family church, Liberty Lighthouse gives to us faithfully every month and this last time when I went to deposit the check I felt unworthiness set in and an overwhelming gratitude.

I suppose inside I struggle with feeling like we aren't giving up enough (our families are in the same country!, I can speak my heart and people understand, we have AIR CONDITIONING!!!)...or not doing enough to be qualified...but then reality hits me and we were never QUALIFIED to be missionaries. Matter of fact, many laughed in our faces and guessed how many months it would take before we returned from Thailand. 4 years later, here we are...more different that I could have ever imagined we would be with so many lessons under our belt I can't even count them.

Where do I get this idea that giving up things and being officially branded as a missionary makes you a missionary? Why does this pleague me so? What makes us missionaries? Missionaries are people who, with reckless abandon, leave behind any ambition of creating a life of stability for the assignment of our God to live to reach a people group. Dedicated to giving their lives to a God given mission...

I can stand before man and God and say that we are missionaries. Does that make us special? No...I believe that God would have us all to be missionaries...dedicated to our God given mission. As my blog numbers dwindle I realize how much I depended on knowing that people are reading...even though we're not in Thailand in a dangerous place anymore I still covet the fellowship and prayer that comes with it. I am also scared to admit to myself that maybe a bit of my man pleasing issues rises up because I'm not receiving as many hits...in turn causing me to feel less loved.
(I really loved this picture I found...It says: "Validation - pre-purchased ticket" think about that for a bit...)
Now, don't get me wrong...I love blogging...just for blogging. But at times I suppose I got some kind of validation for what we were doing from it...and as sad and sick as that is...it's true. Now, most of my validation came from the Lord but I see now in myself that a bit came from all the support we were receiving. But our validation does not come from man...but from our Lord. I thank God that I can share how I am feeling on my blog and express what's going on in my own heart and I thank God that my husband doesn't share my validation issues!! HAHA! He's always so strong and sure...like a strong oak tree with roots going down deep into Him.

We are excited about what God is doing!! I am soo happy to report that at this time God has moved Trent and Amy Pruett back to Texas. Yes! The SAME Trent and Amy Pruett that we worked with in Thailand are back in Texas!!! And even more amazing is that Trent and John are working together now at the office (www.jglm.org). We would have never imagined in a million years (ok MAYBE in a million years...that's a long time!) that we would be back in Texas together, much less, WORKING TOGETHER.

Curry, John and Trent (and Josiah) left today for a week long trip to Denver, Colorado! While I'm going to miss John and Josiah horribly I am soo excited for them because I know this trip is going to be a blast for them! They are holding a Divine Healing Technician Training in Denver, Colorado and they are all very excited about what God is going to do!

So while they are gone this week I'm so thankful that God is continuously working on me and allowing me to take him at his word and be more than a conquerer. With one less child I am praying that I am freed to do much more ministry this week.

I am going to have a lot of time to focus in on allowing God to refine me in the month of March! John will be gone for the entire month of March to Malaysia and Indonesia with his father, Curry Blake (www.jglm.org)!! He is leaving on his birthday (March 3) and will be arriving the day after his father's birthday(April 2)!!

Please be praying for them...there could be upwards of 80,000 people at some of these meetings!!! Malaysia is one of the closed countries of Asia...so it is an honor an a priviledge to share the gospel there. Please pray with me for these meetings and protection and boldness for our men and for me too...becuase let me just tell you...one week with out my husband is heart wrenching for me...so a month could be really rough but I'm asking God to help me be prepared and strong.

Another prayer request is that you be praying for our future home - wherever that may be. We still do not have many many things that we need to have a home (ex. beds, appliances...) and we will be moving from the missions house at the end of April.

Thank you for reading...

Nay, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him that loved us.

YOU SHALL LOVE THE LORD YOUR GOD WITH ALL YOUR HEART, AND WITH ALL YOUR SOUL, AND WITH ALL YOUR STRENGTH, AND WITH ALL YOUR MIND; AND YOUR NEIGHBOR AS YOURSELF

Be Blessed!!! In Jesus Name!!!

2009-02-12T20:42:00.001-08:00

Quickie...

2009-02-08T22:03:00.001-08:00

I'm really sorry I have not been consistant with posting...I'm starting a new this week. So 2 thoughts to leave you with for now:

1. FIREPROOF...WOW...haven't seen it?...go...now...

2. I did this 25 random things about me thing and it was fun...despite the fact that I did it twice...and lost sleep redoing it...but it was suprisingly difficult to come up with 25 things and then to have them all gone with a click of a button!?!?!?!?!?!?!? Luckily I could remember about 20 of them...5 are lost forever and replace by new facts. So...it was fun...here's mine...you should try it...

Rules: Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it's because I think you are an interesting person and would like to know more about you.
____________________________________________________________
I just wrote and worked on 25 random things about me for a good 45 minutes and they were gone in the blink of an eye...I was on number 26....:(:(:(:((...I think I'm done...no wait...I think I see it...I think I see an ounce of willingness deep down in there to try again...ok here I go...

1. I have 9 stupid human tricks that I can do...and no, I won't list them. If you know 6 of my stupid human tricks then we are close...if you know all 9...then you are a girl and we are two peas in a pod!

2. I am a parenting/marriage counseling book junkie...

3. I love books like "This Present Darkenss" by Frank Peretti. I love imaginary worlds like Narnia and stories like "The Neverending Story" and wish I could write books like that.

4. I think I got more out of Thailand than Thailand got out of me...and I'm sad about that...but there is always round 2 right?

5. I love to sing although my voice is not that great...I have a huge passion for dramas...writing them, acting in them, directing them...

5 1/2. I do this:.... WAYY TOO MUCH...SERIOUSLY...but I like it...so it STAYS...:)....

6. I am pretty much bilingual although I'm not fluent in Thai and I miss speaking Thai horribly.

7. I don't remember anything before I was 10 years old...only a few little snap shots and that's it!

8. Sometimes I think that John and I are the only people on the entire planet that love each other the way we do...no really...it's THAT good!

8 1/2. I weep at alter calls.

9. Part of me desperately wants to go back to college and get my Bachlors or Masters in Christian Counseling and do marriage counseling for the rest of my life!!! There is nothing like seeing a marriage restored from nothing...and seeing a forgotten love...remembered...it reminds me of the love of my savior...

10. Names of movie stars stick with me. I don't even have to try - I can be standing in line to check out somewhere and see a tabloid on the rack...and BAM - I know who Eva Longoria is and I can recognize her and remember her name F-O-R-E-V-E-R!!! Weird?

11. Parenting is alot harder than I ever imagined it to be...and it's not because of my children...eventhough I think it is sometimes...I'm learning I'm not ask patient, kind and gentle as I always pictured myself to be...I had just yet to be truely be put in a position for my patience to be tested.

12. I love things that sparkle iridescently. I have a fingernail polish called "Fairy Dust" and if I could paint the world I live in with it...I WOULD! (although John wouldn't like that very much)

13. I lost my father to bone cancer when I was 7 and I'm just now realizing how cognitivly developed you are at 7...I always thought I was too young to be affected and remember. Now I realize that I was too protected to be affected...God protected me and brought me through many things...He truely first loved me and because the lamb that was slain is worthy of His reward...I am His eternally.

14. I have a passion about keeping things simple and seeing through peoples words to the matter at heart and how that relates to my King...

15. I twirl my hair obsessivly...at times, twirling with both hands unknowingly. I find it incredibly hard to stop even if I want to...

16. I really enjoy exercising (especially to salsa videos)...although I have to motivate myself enough to get up and do it...I even love that painful burn that happens.

17. I always hold people to standards that they set for themselves...so much so that my friends are careful to admit wanting to go for something - such as staying away from junk food or making commitments.

18. I usually give advice when I should probably just shut up and listen.

19. I love people's idiosyncrasies. LOVE THEM! Like one of my beautiful friends who signs anything she might see while she's thinking...or the way John's hands look when he turns pages...or my friend with the permenant tickle in her nose that causes her to rub her nose in a circle in a cute kinda way...or the way MB seems to speak purposefully with each word pronounced beautifully...or how a dear friend of mine will trail off in mid sentence and then come back to me within a few seconds...oh I could go on forever.

20. I am a MCP (Microsoft Certified Professional) in TCP/IP and a Certified Novel Administrator - I'm also a Network Engineer who has abandoned her career for the journey of a life time and loving every minute of it.

21. I can type 80 words per minutes...that is, unless it's cold - then I'm down to 60 wpm.

22. I like to know the facts and be well informed before talking about a subject and it really frustrates me when people put forth their own assumptions as truth without any knowledge or study about it.

23. I have a SERIOUS weakness for icecream...and an ultimate weakness for snickers ice cream bars.

24. I LOVE how my husband and I are who we are together...and I LOVE that I can trust him with my whole heart...holding nothing back. And I love that the way he looks at me never falters...and his laugh...it's so contagious and joyful. And I...wait...does this still count as 1?

25. I feel priviledged to have been a missionary in Thailand and hope to return soon. I feel a bond with missionaries and a desire to be a support for them that is a bit hard to cultivate...I'm priviledged to have first hand knowledge of what it is like to be on a foreign mission field...unique doesn't describe it.

26.(just because I can) I love this (look at him dance!): http://www.%20youtube.%20com/watch?v=jJ_-CmwHWPo&eurl=http://profile.

This is beautiful and amazing: http://www.%20youtube.%20com/watch?v=25VGdNU3nrU&eurl=http://profile.

And this is one of the best dramas ever done: http://www.msplinks.com/MDFodHRwOi8vd3d3LnRhbmdsZS5jb20vdmlld192aWRlby5waHA/dmlld2tleT1lZGM5YzU5YjJlYjI5Nzc2MDI3YQ==

Count the Cost

2009-01-31T21:27:00.000-08:00

Americans love restaurants. One recent survey estimates that most of us eat out an average of 3.4 times a week, spending $25 each time. That's $340 a month and $4,420 a year!

In 1970, Americans spent $6 billion on burgers and fries. By 2000, our fast-food tab reached $110 billion! (Home Life Magazine, Sept. 2004 pg.9)
___________________________________________________
Wow...had to share those numbers with you...wow...

"Welcome to Fast Foods! How can we destroy your internal organs?"

Dave Ramsey

Snowed Ice! Water heater...and pics...

2009-01-28T14:11:00.000-08:00

It snowed ice today! We woke up and we had a semi-winter wonderland outside! Since breakfast had just begun and I had gasped before thinking...I forwarned my boys that what they were about to see was not what they thought it was...(ice instead of snow)...because I know my sons. Jump-out-of-your-skin squeals were about to follow with choas errupting and heading for the door to play in the "snow".

I said "now...listen...Josiah and Jude...what I'm about to show you is not what you think it is ok? So don't get tooooo excited..." I slung open the blinds (a little too dramatically...part of me was really enjoying there inevitable excitement...just not enjoying the thought that breakfast would be threatened and ear drums might be busted)...and what came...

"SNOW SNOW SNOW...JUDE IT'S SNOW!!! AHHH!!!" (lots of squealing)...then I jumped in when I had the moment...and stated..."No one goes outside without finishing their breakfast pita first...OH AND you have to get suited up!"

It was fun but they came back in about 30 minutes after their little fingers could take no more. Josiah loves icicles and he even found one that looked like a music note...and in the circle part there was a frozen leave...pretty neat if I do say so myself. What do you think? (Oh and by the way, that goofy lookin face is him singing the note he's holding...hehehehe)

Once Josiah and Jude came in...Josiah's fingers were frozen - Jude likes to watch so his weren't popsicles YET...so I brought Josiah over to the sink and turned on the cold water and let him put his fingers under it and slowly let it get warmer and warmer. Then I was reminded that this little boy has spent the past 4 years of his life in Thailand when he said:

"MOMMA! How is this happening??? How are you doing that? HOw does that work?" I had to get clarification because I saw nothing out of the ordinary and then it dawned on me that Josiah has never used a sink that has hot running water coming to it. He's had hot showers and baths but he's never used a sink that had hot water ability (well, that he knew about - because on furlough he was to young to try the other knob to get hot water).

He continued on "So you just inject the hot water through there?" INJECT?!?! I answered "yeah, kind of...you see there is something called a water heater" He starts looking on the wall to see the water heater...because in Thailand the water heater for the shower hangs on the wall...I taught him about water heaters in America and how the hot water runs through pipes and he was amazed...

Ready to go...

Cutie Pie!!!

Sitting pretty...

Thank you God for my wonderful children...

Cozy Campfire Days Are Gone

2009-01-23T21:33:00.000-08:00

I am floored tonight. I watched possibly the best video ever…at least one of them. It’s called “Finger of God” (thanks Barb). As I sat there watching God moving on people I was overwhelmed and could not hold back my tears. I have been going through a battle that I had not even chosen to recognize. I have not spoken my battle out to anyone because I myself didn't even realize it was happening.

For the past week I can not even begin to explain how I have felt and give it justice…but I will try. I have felt like one of the most useless people walking this earth. I felt as if everything I had ever done was nothing but a joke. I felt like my faith in God was weak and empty – I felt like the people I have been trying to love all these years are unreachable and not only that they are laughing in my face right along with the enemy.

I’ve felt like a failure in the body of Christ…l felt like the epitome of 2 Timothy 3:5: “Having a form of godliness, but denying the power thereof” of which the bible says to stay away from these types of people. As I sat there and watch Heidi Baker ministering to the Africans, healing the deaf and the lame…loving like Jesus would I was floored.

All I could think about through the tears was a combination of two things…

1. Oh God you are good…thank you God. Let me do that for you…allow me Lord to serve you like that...use me God to bring people face to face with you.

2. What a failure you were in Thailand…you didn’t bring the fire of God as you came to do…you yourself never even reaped one single soul. What did you do? You stayed in your home and took care of your children and “did what you could, when you could” (my own words) You aren’t worthy of the name missionary…those people are real missionaries. You should never have gone. (this has no baring on what my husband did for the Lord in Thailand...John worked is bottom off and spread the gospel in places it has never been)

As I continued to watch…tears streaming from my eyes…I could not contain the joy and pure in aweness of our God and his goodness. I love everything about Him and His message. The message that changed my life…I was a lost teenager…heavily into witchcraft and desperate for someone to see me…someone to love me.

I had no talents to speak of…I wasn’t beautiful…I wasn’t witty…definitely not funny but what I did have was that when I placed my hands on a Ouija board it moved and I wasn’t the one moving it. When I wanted to contact a spirit…I did and things happened and that was exciting to my “friends”. I was so desperate to be special the devil took advantage.

I still remember the view at camp. They had gathered us on a huge hill after a full day of fun with the counselors and we sat at the top of the hill and in the distance we saw lights approaching. We were instructed that now was not a time to play or talk because we were about to witness something very important. As the torches drew closer I could hear angry shouting and crying at the same time.

Through the flames and smoke I made out the figure of the cross in a shape I’d never seen before. It looked as if it was floating flat and then as it drew closer I saw there was a man below it…beaten and bloody…carrying it as guards whipped him. I watched as people followed behind and wept…and some cheered. I watched as they nailed Jesus to the cross…one nail at a time.

When the pole went into the ground and I heard a huge thud as it settled it was like something hit my heart and I could not stop weeping. When he screamed the words “it is finished” I was in love. It had all come together. At that moment I recognized my need for a savior to cover my sins and what a desperate lonely sinner I was…and this man…this Jesus came to give his life for me. He came to bridge the gap between me and God.

It was never the same again…I’ve been in love with him since and I still remember when I was younger and things were much simpler…waking up in the morning and just laying there smiling…with an unstoppable grin…because I had Jesus in my heart and I could feel his presence and I literally needed nothing more.

I remember just bursting with His love and dancing because I was so filled up and had to release it some way. The Bible was the best book I had ever had my hands on and I devoured it daily…no one could destroy my love for Him – I am my beloved’s and He is mine was my confidence. Even when I lost my world…my best friend, my fiancé, my mom’s confidence in me, my comfortable foundation…I still laid there that night…face up on my bed and just smiled and physically spoke through tears…"but as long as I have you Daddy I am happy".
So how is it that now, I’m 29 years old and a missionary on a short term mission trip…mother of 3 and wife to a wonderful 1 and at times this questions rocks me to my core: (quote from Crazy Love by Francis Chan – GET IT!) "what if heaven was you and all those you loved, healed, no pain, no problems, just parties and fun and joy and love. But no Christ. Would that be ok with you?"

My heart is for the Lord but yet when I ask myself this question I am shocked that I know the right answer and have been there for a long time but in my heart of hearts I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that I live my life at times as if I am ok with JESUS not being apart of my EVERYDAY life. As if I am ok with being some where inbetween average and ON FIRE FOR HIM. When I say above average - please don't think I'm being self righteous or something like that...I just know I don't believe and live like the normal/average Christian lives but yet I'm not allowing myself to be on fire for him either.

I’m not ok with ANYTHING but totally and absolutely, head over heels in love with Jesus and yet I’ve allowed myself to become this above average Christian without allowing Him to consume me as he always has. I feel like the work of the mission field left me a bit jaded because I didn’t trust and lean on Him throughout…allowing the continuous disappointment and the inability to get through to people’s hearts consume me and create some sort of callous because I felt like I couldn’t “keep wanting more”.

I felt spent and it was either…settle for the average…settle and be ok with just doing what you can do – allow the opportunity to come to you instead of MAKING the opportunity. Go to church on Sunday instead of BE THE CHURCH on Sunday…love conservatively instead of love ridiculously…it’s the difference between abiding and watching from afar.

I had allowed myself to give over to the much easier path of conformity because it was too hard to keep giving it my all…it seemed too hard to keep believing for miracles and keep stepping out even when in and of myself…hope for that soul was gone…but in Jesus…there is HOPE.

I focused so much on our affect on Thailand – I am just now realizing its effects on me. Now that we are back and I can’t seem to meet with hardly any of the people I genuinely love and want to fellowship with – I can’t find time to go out on the streets and witness – I feel like a ping pong ball because we’re bouncing around between so many of the churches that have loved us and continue to love us…and I so desperately want to be steady and serve - nothing in life is consistant since John is gone sporatically and we still do not and have not been in a permenant home situation in over a year and a half...and I ask myself “am I willing to go the second mile?”.

Am I willing to allow God to reignite the blue flame…not just the steady flame but the raging fire that burned with love for my savior and set me apart? No matter what the circumstances...Am I willing to continue weeping even when my body says it’s been enough? Am I willing to push the envelope and press in…PRESS IN to God and allow Him to have me completely and wholly as He once did? Am I willing that after I’ve gone that long mile for Him…and my body aches and I willing to go that second mile?

Yes Lord. Yes Lord….Yes Lord….Yes…All for you King Jesus…because the lamb that was slain is WORTHY OF HIS REWARD!

I ask you as you read this to ask yourself if you would be happy if you found yourself in a heaven that consisted of you, your family and friends, all the comforts you need, with everyone healed and happy…but Jesus was not there…would that be enough for you?

Do you truly know Jesus Christ as your personal savior? Have you given your life fully to Him with reckless abandon? Are you walking with Him daily? Have you settled for less in your Christian walk…have you stopped seeking Him as you once did?

Brothers and sisters in Christ – I beseech you to get on your face before God…repent and go after God with all that you are. Believe your beliefs and relinquish your life to God and you will not be disappointed. If your heart has been moved by this post…don’t call your friend…or pastor to help you through this…get on your face before God and let the Pastor of all Pastors shepherd you.

Have a personal experience with God right now…right where you are. (I’m not saying don’t go to church…I’m simply saying…don’t rely on man to give you an experience…experience God for yourself right now…you have direct access through the blood of Jesus and an experience with God is not dependant on anything but your surrendered heart and God…alone in a room…then GO TO CHURCH)

Ask God to move in your life and speak to you. Turn away from the things that you know do not please Him and begin to seek Him with all that you are…don’t settle…for lukewarm or even warm…BURN for Him.

My absolute favorite song by Nichole Nordeman when I was a teenager:

Started rubbing sticks together
I thought a spark would take forever
I never dreamt this fire would appear

When Moses saw the Bush in flames
And heard the branches speak his name
I wonder if he felt this kind of fear

'Cause I'm burnin'
Yeah, I'm burnin'
And I know I'm gonna blister in these flames
So I'll stay here
'Till this smoke clears
And I'll find you in the ashes that remain

Used to be that I could say
My faith was one arm's length away
From any flame that ever felt too warm

Asked for matches, but I received
A gallon full of gasoline
Now my cozy campfire days are gone

'Cause I'm burnin
'Yeah I'm burnin'
And I know I'm gonna blister in these flames
So I'll stay here
'Till this smoke clears
And I'll find you in the ashes that remain

'Knock with caution at the door
'They said, 'Beware of what you're praying for'
So I'll stand here with my whole desire

In the middle of this forest fire
'Till I've nothing left to show
And new life begins to grow...

update

2009-01-16T13:46:00.000-08:00

Hi all!

No...I haven't disappeared off of the face of the earth. I promise...I'm still here...day by day...hour by hour...I'm still here. :) That sounded a little glum...well, I suppose that because today has been rough. But what's crazy is that I've had the best 2 weeks...despite John being gone. I have felt so encouraged in my spirit and excited about what God is doing and had sooo much grace for my children but it seems as though today...my cup is a bit empty.

We did receive some great news though - we WILL be moving to Denver, Colorado in April! I'm excited about this although I had definitly let myself dream a little dream...for a little too long...a dream of staying here with all my family and friends.

John brought back 2 magazines all about Denver for me to pour over. He also bought me the book Captivating by Eldridge and his wife...you know the guy who wrote "Wild At Heart" (the best book ever for christian men). I haven't been able to sit down and read it yet because pretty much as soon as John got back he was gone again.

Unfortunatly, there was a family member that passed away and the funeral was today so Curry and John were off to Nacona yesterday...his dirty clothes weren't even washed yet from the trip! I suppose that might have something to do with my empty cup...I was planning on relaxing and having help after a week of being a single mother. But...it doesn't matter...he'll be back today....and we can all spend time together and enjoy each others company and HELP MOMMY! :) hehehe...

I know I know...there are lots of single mothers out there who do it all the time and I ADMIRE you...SERIOUSLY! I have a new found respect of single mothers...especially those who have two or more children! It is not easy...but it is apart of our new life here in the states and while John was gone...I MISSED HIM TERRIBLY...but there was so much grace for everything that needed to be done. The first day I just determined in myself that...I will rejoice if unloading the car only takes 3 trips...so that way when it takes the normal 2 I won't be frustrated. :)

God is so incredible and the supplier of all that we need...so I know that in March...when John is gone for a whole month that it will be alright. John will be going with his father on a trip to multiple destinations in Malaysia and Thailand. Please keep us in your prayers during that time. It's going to be an incredible trip and we're praying that God moves mightily.

You know...I think one of the hardest things being back is that so many people don't know why we are back...and when I speak to them there is this look of disappointment on their faces. It's hard for me not to justify and try to defend why we are here because I have struggled in the past with what "men" think and needing approval from man more than from God. But I've found so much peace in being here...seeing God move and knowing that we are where we are supposed to be. I suppose it just makes me sad that they just assume the worst...that we gave up and came home.

In the light of eternity all that matters is that we are doing what God has told us to do and that we continue in that. On a really good note, I am going to be here during a very special time...perfect timing because two of my best friends in the world are getting married! I'm the maid of honor in one and a groomsmaid in the other. yeah...groomsmaid. :) Love it!

I'm really excited because I'm working on some ideas I have...I can't wait to show you some pictures once I've done one of them. All I need is one decently warm day - living in Texas that is bound to happen anyday now...the weather seems bi polar here...no joke. One day it's freezing and the next it's warm...

Thank you for stopping in...since returning not many of you are stopping by anymore...22 a day to 10...disappointed?

Does Spiritual Growth Just Happen?

2009-01-08T07:52:00.000-08:00

Does Spiritual Growth Just Happen?
by Rick Warren

You have been believers so long now that you ought to be teaching others. Instead, you need someone to teach you again the basic things about God’s word. You are like babies who need milk and cannot eat solid food. Hebrews 5:12 (NLT)
*** *** *** ***

Millions of Christians have grown older without ever growing up; they act as though spiritual growth is automatic. They may have a plan to save for retirement. They may have a plan for sending their kids to college. But they don’t have a strategy for enriching their souls.

They leave the single most important facet of human existence to chance! But a soul doesn’t automatically grow to maturity any more than a baby automatically grows to physical maturity. You need to have a plan for feeding, exercise, education – and especially potty training – if a child is going to grow up healthy, strong, and mature.

A baby left on its own withers and dies. The same thing is true of your soul. Our world is full of people who have grown older but are still babies when it comes to spiritual maturity. Spiritual growth is not automatic even for people who have opened their hearts to Christ. The writer of Hebrews sadly noted, “You have been believers so long now that you ought to be teaching others. Instead, you need someone to teach you again the basic things about God’s word.”

“You are like babies who need milk and cannot eat solid food. For someone who lives on milk is still an infant and doesn’t know how to do what is right. Solid food is for those who are mature, who through training have the skill to recognize the difference between right and wrong” (Hebrews 5:12-14 NLT).

© 2008 Purpose Driven Life. All rights reserved. Rick Warren is the founding pastor of Saddleback Church in Lake Forest, Calif., one of America's largest and best-known churches. In addition, Rick is author of the New York Times bestseller The Purpose Driven Life and The Purpose Driven Church, which was named one of the 100 Christian books that changed the 20th Century. He is also founder of Pastors.com, a global Internet community for ministers.

If you read nothing...watch the video...

2009-01-07T20:19:00.000-08:00

If you are short on time and read none of what I wrote...at least watch the video and if you ever have time watch Paris Reidhead's sermon "Ten Sheckles and a Shirt" on YouTube or read it online...or listen to it at: www.sermonindex.com
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Here it is 10am and I find myself feeling rather alive instead of feeling like a cat who has been the focus of a dog hunt...ok so that's an exhaugeration but I did stay up until 3 am last night chatting with a future missionary. OH I love I love I love God. Me and this wonderful young woman got to talking and we could have gone on for days. I love fellowship with like minded people. I generally love fellowship period but when you are taking to someone who is on the same page...it's just so awesome.

I had met this young lady before returning to Thailand this last time and was very impressed with her heart for missions. She had applied with a missions group to go to Africa and was waiting to hear back from them at that time. So this last new years eve we were at her church...Pathway and she told me that because of her recent church change...so went from a Baptist Church to a Nondenominational Church that someone had lodged a formal complaint with that missions group because she was no longer attending a baptist church. She was removed from the mission trip...

So as I was talking to her I remembered back to Renee telling me that they had been praying for a young woman to come and serve in their family...as a homeschool helper. And I remembered the things that Renee said were important to her in the person that she had been praying for to come...and I was looking at her. So I told her about Todd and Renee and what they are doing in southern Thailand and what they were looking for and Ashley lit up but said she would pray about it. Long story short...she prayed about it and said she would love to go and last night we talked to the Pruetts and it's a go!

I'm really excited for them...it's very exciting for them and exciting for this young lady too! It really seems to me that God has set this up. When she was told that she couldn't go to Africa she was broken...and little did she know that God had another plan for her. An awesome one at that...anyone who gets to spend time in the home of Todd and Renee Pruett will learn and grow in leaps and bounds from experiencing their wisdom and love.

So things are in action...John is gone with his father for a week. This week they are in Denver, Colorado - so if you live near there...go to: http://www.jglm.org/ and get the directions because these are meetings you will not want to miss...and they are always FREE. I'm excited for John simply because after a month of moving, preparing, going through stuff, traveling and settling in John is finally able to do what God spoke to him and told him to do...travel with his father. So, while I'm sad about him not being here for a week...I'm excited because we're finally here...doing what he's instructed.

The boys took it very hard yesterday when John left...tears and all. I thought I would help them get over it with some candy and JOsiah put me in my place when he said through tears "I don't want candy Momma...I want Daddy!". OH my heart just hurt...but they were ok after about 30 minutes. God is steadily working on my heart - I feel his presence throughout my day and I'm in awe. It's my fault that it isn't always this way...it just feels so good to allow God to be apart of every moment of my day. I keep being drawn back to Paris Reidhead and the story he told of two Moravians...as I continually dwell on what it means to deny yourself...take up your cross daily and follow Jesus...I'll leave you with the story he shared:

And for those of you who can't play that video:
Two young Moravians heard of an island in the west indies where an athiest British owners had 2000-3000 slaves, and the owner had said, “No preacher, no clergyman will ever step foot on this Island. If he’s shipwrecked we’ll keep him in a separate house until he has to leave, but he’s never going to talk to any of us about God. I’m through with all that non-sense.”

3000 slaves from the jungles of Africa brought to an island in the Atlantic and there to live and die without hearing of Christ. Two young Moravians heard about it. They sold themselves to the British planter and used the money to buy passage to the island, for he paid no more than he would pay for any slave and wouldn’t transport them. And as the ship left the pier at the river Hamburg, the Moravians had come to see the two young lads off. Never to return again for this wasn’t a 4 year term.

They’d sold themselves into lifelong slavery, simply that as slaves, they could be as Christians were these others were. The families were there weeping for they knew they’d never see them again. And as the gap widened and the hawsers were being curled up on the pier, and the young boys saw the widening gap.

One lad, his arm linked through the arm of his fellow raised his hand and shouted across the gap the last words that were ever heard from them… They were these:MAY THE LAMB THAT WAS SLAIN, RECEIVE THE REWARD OF HIS SUFFERING.

This became the call of Moravian missions, and this is the only reason for being, that the lamb that was slain, may recieve the reward of His suffering.

From Paris Reidhead’s Ten Shekels and a Shirt

Case of the RED FACE....

2008-12-30T05:24:00.000-08:00

The end of jetlag is finally in sight and I have to say I am so glad because my physical body couldn't have taken much more. Sunday evening we went to visit Pathway Church in
Whitesboro and at the end we were talking to different people and during one of my conversations I went completely blank...

You know that embarrassed feeling when you feel your face burn? And that feeling of complete moronishness (?ok...just give me that word...my brain is just starting to wake up) just sticks with you for a few hours? Making you feel like you need to explain yourself and talk about it but you don't' because it reallly really wasn't that big of a deal!?? Does anyone know that feeling?

Ok...well, I forgot it existed. NOT that I don't do completely embarrassing things at times but it's something that God has taught me since my incredibly self conscious high school years...everyone messes up and it's not that big of a deal...so I am usually spared the red face as I laugh it off and move on...but last night I was not spared...OH NO!

I was just trying to share how a good friend of ours explained what giving up Thailand for this season is like the best. I went on to say...(I have to say I was speaking coherently although my eyes were red and my mind was darting back and forth, along with my eyes trying to figure out where my children were) "A dear friend of ours gave us an example that really does explain what it's like leaving Thailand...In the old testament the story of.........." (insert blank stare here...)

....well, ummm....the story of....I'm trying to think of the story...(trying DESPERATELY to pull Abraham's name from my brain but it was like all the names of the men of God from the old testament were swirling together in one big crock pot and for the life of me I could not remember who almost sacrificed their son to GOD!!!! AHHH!!!)

OK here is my honest flesh...as this point I know I'm in trouble so I try to start to think of the other story that is a good explanation of what we're going through and I can't think of any of that...I continued on in great pain....staring down and then up at her expectant face..."uhhh....well....I'm sorry....I'm trying to think of the other story...my brain just isn't working...when he sacrificed...(and then my flesh started kicking in...I was sinking and I didn't want to ask for help or let on that I was COMPLETELY STUMPED! I mean goodness...I'm a missionary...I KNOW THE STORY OF ABRAHAM....hehehehe...nope...to my demise I continued on stretching and grabbing for Isaac's father's name....oh what is it?!?!?! Someone put me out of my misery....PLEASE!)

And then she did it....I promise it had to have been a full 30 seconds where I'm just looking at her stammering!!! OK...30 seconds doesn't sound like that much but I want you to stop reading and count to 30 seconds slowly and imagine stammering through it.......go on....do it....you've got time...come one....

NOW...wasn't that painful!!!!??? OH where was I....oh yeah, and then she did it...she said "You mean Abraham?" and by that point I was trying so desperately to remember the other story I was just like....uh yeah...but what was the other one....oh man....

She gracefully let me give my excuses for sounding like such a completely incompetent missionary...lol...hehehehe...not that I know the bible inside or out or anything - I'm still working on that...but my goodness...you don't belong on the mission field if you don't know the word of God....much less the name of ABRAHAM and his many stories!

So yeah, I walked away feeling so idiotic...my eyes were burning from sleep deprivation and my head had a dull ache that just would not quit and my physical body had a involuntary slump that I could not correct no matter how I commanded myself to sit up. I should have been able to laugh that one off but I just felt so stupid...it's just pride.

I didn't want that woman, whom I had met once before...think that I was inept...LOL! And so I was embarrassed. God help me die! hehehee...until then...I will NEVER forget ABRAHAM...no matter how tired I am!!!!

Last night was our first night of real sleep and I am feelin good this morning!!!! WAHOO! This missions house is such a blessing...I still am just kind of in awe that we're here again. God is so good...I just keep saying it over and over again...I think some people are like...YES HE IS!!! STOP SAYING IT OVER AND OVER!!

Because I'm the kind of person that usually when I say something about the goodness of God I'm lookin for an AMEN or someone with eyes ready to meet mine in greatfulness....I just love when I'm giving glory to God and there is someone who is right there who is on the same page and they are just relishing in the goodness of God with me...

I got some pants yesterday and I am sooooooooooo RELIEVED to have them! Why am I relieved instead of glad? Glad that I'm not freezing in my capris anymore...?? Because I looked like a big goof ball running around in capris...men's socks and tennis shoes in cold weather. I'm not into fashion ladies...really I'm not...ask any one who knows me...but I have a few things in my head that are just no no's...and capris with socks and tennis shoes are one of them!!!

So since we touched down in America...I have been letting go of my pride as I go out in public like that. Apparently a lot of people were capris with socks and tennis shoes and it's not so weird as I think...because I would say something about it and people would be like "What's wrong with that?" So where did I get this fashion sense? No idea...but it still looks completely silly on me...to me.

Most women...(except every picture I found only wore sandals...which gives me validity to believe that capris and tennis shoes during WINTER just are not OK)...

Me.....

Many women can pull it off...I'm not one that likes it. Please don't get me wrong if capris, socks and tennis shoes are your summer wear...it's just me. :) So...my new pair of pants are going to get lots and lots of wear!!! I'm so glad that things are settling down...sleep wise. It seems like now I can think beyond what's before me at the moment and it is sooo refreshing! I'm so excited about the opportunities to spend time with family and friends and I'm most encouraged that I'll be able to encourage people in Christ in ENGLISH! :)

I am praying that my time with God each day will fill my cup up so much that I can't contain all that He is...and that it flows out of me effortlessly. HA! When I said that I thought of my sons...fighting...now...that will take some effort...handling them with gentleness and love...regardless of their attitudes...ugg...only through Him can I master that feat...So with that I'll leave you and be off for some time with Him while all are still asleep. Oppp...Joss is awake now...that's ok...Joss is a good prayer partner.

On another note...Jossalyn and Jude are both sick...please be praying for them. We are ready for them to be healed...they both have that lovely green snot and Joss has a really bad cough and when she breaths you can hear it in her little chest.

What Missionaries Ought to know about Grief

2008-12-27T06:03:00.000-08:00

Thanks for this awesome article Jacqueline! Wow! Wish I had read this 5 years ago! here is what Jacqueline had to say in regards to the article...

What Missionaries Ought to know about Grief
Ronald L. Koteskey
download this as a pdf file

You may say, "I don't need to know anything about grief. No one in my family has died, and when someone does, I'll fly home to the funeral." If and when that happens, it may be one of your easier encounters with grief because everyone there will understand your grief, and your culture has developed rituals to enable you to resolve your grief. Although we commonly think of grief as related to the death of a loved one, there are many other causes of grief.

The dictionary defines grief as the "intense emotional suffering caused by loss of any kind." Missionaries experience many losses that other people do not, so those people do not understand. There is no funeral or other ritual to assist in grieving over these losses.

Missionaries may offer true, but over-spiritualized, platitudes in denial of the losses they experience. When people are dying and losing everything, we do not question their denial, anger, or depression before they come to accept their loss. Regarding losses other than death, missionaries may carry a load of unexpressed, unresolved grief.

More important than the "objective" severity of the loss is each person's own interpretation of the loss. Leaving a pet may seem like a minor event to most people, but those who have had that pet for years may experience much grief. Here are several losses that may increase grief for missionaries.

Things?
Everyone understands the loss of friends and family, but what about the house, the car, the supermarket, the school, the pets, the newspaper, and the toys? All of these, and more, are lost as you leave your passport country to become missionaries. Any, or all, may cause grief.
You may develop two homes, one in your passport country and one on the field. When you come "home," people there cannot understand that you feel the loss of the smells, the foods, the animals, the friendliness of the people, and the music of the country where you have been serving. Losing these may cause grief when you return to your passport country.

Transfers?

Headquarters calls, and you move to another field. You lose everything you have come to love over the last months or years. Grief comes again. Perhaps this culture has become home to your teens, and when you move to the new field, your older adolescents remain with other missionaries to finish school. They may be old enough to marry a national and stay behind forever-another loss and more grief.

The field committee asks you to take over a project that has not been handled well by another missionary. However, that means leaving what you have been doing so effectively-another loss. Your new project does not take off and the one you left also declines-more grief.

Transitions?

You knew that being a missionary would mean moving even more often than other people do in our mobile culture. Built into long-term missionary life are usually at least two moves every five years, four years on the field and one at home. In addition are the countless moves to different fields, to different places on the same field, to different states on home assignment, etc. The list of transitions seems endless.

People sometimes say IBM means "I've Been Moved." In the same way, MAF may seem to mean "Move Again, Friend," or WGM may seem to mean "We've Gotta Move." Missionaries are always saying good-bye, multiple good-byes to people, places, possessions and pets-grieving for all.

The hardest transitions seem to be premature departures. How do you say good-bye when you don't want to leave? What if there has been a moral lapse? What if you have not been able to stand up under the emotional strain? What if headquarters just said to leave your assignment or to leave the mission? What if you are leaving in an evacuation? More grief.

Travel?

Travel is exciting to many people, but to missionaries on deputation, it can be dreary. You have been away from home for several years on the field, and now you are away even more. When overseas you could not get home for the funeral of a friend (no money, no flight available, no time free), but now that you are at home, you cannot get back to the field for a funeral there-unresolved grief in both cases.

Before airplanes, travel time was a time to work through the loss, through grief. It took at least days, if not weeks, to get from country to country whether traveling by ship, train, or horse-drawn vehicle. Today missionaries finish packing, step onto the plane, and in a few hours are at their destination. They have had no time to work through the loss.

Time?

That brings us to the time it takes to grieve. Grieving rituals are different in different cultures, so grief is expected to take different times in each. Grieving always takes time, sometimes much time. It may take a few days for leaving things, weeks for leaving friends, and months for the death of a loved one. Some people say that such bereavement should be over in a couple months, but it often takes much longer. Those who try to short-circuit the grieving process may experience problems years later.

Triggers?

Long after your time of grieving seems to be over, you may suddenly feel the loss intensely again. "Triggers" (stimuli that bring back memories of the lost person, place, or thing) surprise you by suddenly reactivating the grief. You may not even realize that you saw, heard, or smelled something that brought back memories of the loss. Smell is especially likely to do this, and you will not even know why you thought of that person, place, possession or pet.

Anniversaries are particularly difficult, especially wedding anniversaries. Birthday anniversaries are another difficult time. "First's" are also difficult, such as the first Christmas or first family reunion. Related events in others' lives may be difficult, such as the birth of a friend's child bringing back the loss of your own-years later, when you thought the grief was gone.

Trauma?

Missionaries may be more likely to experience traumatic situations. Other cultures may be more likely to have assault, political unrest, evacuations, bombings, killings, kidnappings, and so forth. When this happens to a missionary, others also become involved, and rightly so. Even though they did not experience the trauma firsthand, those helping also often grieve over the loss caused by the trauma.

Theology?

When a people in business get moved, they blame the company. When people in the military get moved, they blame the government. When missionaries get moved, they may blame not only administrators at headquarters, but also God himself. After all people have prayed about the move and have determined that it is God's will. God called us, he made us move, and it is his fault. Naomi's statements about God in Ruth 1:20-21 are excellent examples. Returning missionaries may feel just as she did.

What can we do about it?

Be honest. The loss and grief you experience is real. Do not deny it; it really hurts. Do not over spiritualize it and say what a privilege it is to suffer for Jesus, if it is not. Be honest and open about your feelings of loss.

Be informed. Reading this brochure and other material about grief helps you become informed. Realize that all of these "Ts" are especially relevant to missionaries.

Be Christian. Too often Christians deny their feelings of grief. They may quote 1 Thessalonians 4:13 as saying that we are not "to grieve like the rest of men." Do not stop there because the rest of the verse is "who have no hope." We grieve, but like people who have hope. Look at what the Bible says:

Abraham grieved. Genesis 23:2
Jacob grieved. Genesis 37:35
David grieved. 2 Samuel 18:33
Jesus grieved. John 11:35.

"Jesus wept" is one of the shortest but most important verses in the Bible. If he wept at the funeral of a friend, we certainly can grieve about our losses.

Be missionaries. We have an excellent example of people saying good-bye to missionaries in Acts 20:17-21:1. Paul talked extensively about his leaving them, and then beginning in verse 36, note what they did:

They said their good-byes.
They knelt.
They prayed.
They wept.
They embraced.
They kissed.
They went to the ship.
They tore themselves away.

This is a good example of the grief expressed at the parting of a missionary. Paul had ministered to them two years, and such grief is normal and expected. If you do not express the grief over your losses, it may remain unresolved and return to hinder your work. Be honest informed Christian missionaries relative to your loss and grief.

We're BAAACCK!!!

2008-12-23T22:33:00.000-08:00

We arrived EARLY this morning at DFW and were ready to drop! Whew...the last plane...plane 3 of 3...was about 13 hours long...it felt like the flight that would never end!!! But it did and we survived...the kids did wonderful really. They were real champs about it all.

Although, it was very tough on Josiah the day we left - he cried more than I did. He just kept saying "I don't wanna leave Thailand". It broke my heart!!! The Hat Yai Team gave us a wonderful goodbye and I didn't weep profusely as I thought I would...I was able to control my crying and prevent a snot fest.

Our Thailand Family

Curry and Dawn (John's parents) picked us up from the airport - it was so wonderful to see them. It's a strange feeling to just be back. We've come back 2 times over the past 4 years and each time it was with the expectancy that we're going straight back in 3 months or a bit more...but this time we have no idea when we'll go back. We're just here.

We're not JUST here...I don't mean that negatively at all. So...what food did we have first? Welp, since we were in the states 6 months ago it wasn't that big of a deal to eat American food again. Although, John was extremely glad to be able to eat his meal without having to pick through it first and bite cautiously. Something happened during this last time of being back with me...I didn't crave American foods...I wanted Thai food. It wasn't that big of a deal to find a bag of doritos or macaroni and cheese at one of the nice import stores like it used to be...it used to be like finding treasure.

And a really funny thing I noticed tonight...I was walking around Wal-Mart at 2:30AM - UH HUH...A.M.!!! The boys slept all day by accident - I layed down at 2:30ish and they were already asleep expecting that John would wake us up at 4...but we didn't get woken up until 6:40pm and the boys wouldn't wake up! I've never seen them that way before. Normally jetlag isn't a big deal for my boys. So...when everyone else was crashing - the boys were WIDE AWAKe and ready to romp.

So at about 1am I was about to go out of my mind trying to keep them quiet and in one room and OFF THE FURNITURE!! So I loaded them all up into Dawn's car and off to wal-mart we went. We walked that whole place and it was so fun. Everything in America is so well made - it's so nice because everywhere I looked there was good quality stuff. Everything was so clean and I could speak to the night workers in English. It feels so good just to smile at someone and say hi and have small talk in english right now.

About what I was saying - the POINT of this little tale...is that while I was looking over a baby item (neat little bottle contraption that you can feed your baby...baby food out of) and considering it...I had to convert in my head how much it would cost into Thai baht to see if I would be willing to spend that much money on it. My worth calculator has been reset to Thai baht!!! After I did it and discovered that it was worth buying and not too expensive - I just laughed to myself...realizing that more parts of me had changed and adjusted to living in Thailand that I had known.

It's 7:32am and the boys and Joss are just now falling asleep. I plan to let them sleep a few more hours and then keep them awake with promises of ChuckECheese as long as I can hold out and then when my last card is drawn...We'll pray for lots of patience and take our exhausted boys to ChuckECheese and let them go WILD...bring them home and let them crash at 7:30pm and I think we will be good.

Ah...it's a good plan...but we'll see how well it works in practice. I'm off to spend some time with Jesus and then catch a few hours myself...here are some pictures...enjoy!

Church Plant - Baan Phrut

Dear Mee Khiaw

Some of the kids playing

Pii Thak and I

CheAnn saying "Thank you for bringing me a tract!"

Praying for Pii Thak and CheAnn

Joss having fun at church...

Clinton preaching his heart out...

Me listening in my "reserved" church spot

My beautiful sister in Christ - Candy...I'm going to miss her so much!

Focused?

2008-12-21T07:47:00.000-08:00

We're leaving tomorrow...it seems like this night has been forever in coming!! Tomorrow we will rise early and go through my last "to do's" as fast as possible and then be off to the airport by 12 for our flight that leaves at 2pm to Bangkok. Once in Bangkok we have to wait around until 1am for our next flight that goes from Bangkok to Soel, Korea. From Korea we go straight into DFW.

Tonight John and I were able to leave together on the bike to get somethings from downtown...and as I sat on the back of the bike I was lost in all the memories from the past 4 years here in Thailand. As we drove toward downtown and then through downtown I kept taking it in. Trying my hardest to burn pictures into my memory. I want Thailand to stay fresh in my heart. All that it is and all that believe God will do here.

I kept taking intentional deep breaths...taking in all the smells that once drove me crazy as we walked the streets...and savoring them. I still remember a distinct smell from Haiti when I was only a child...I later found out that it was from Rum factories near by...but the smells in Thailand...wow...as you drive...it's like someone playing a mean trick on you. One moment you smell delicious food...then weird food...then sewage...then more weird food...and then incense...then sewage again...then delicious food.

I looked at the sky line and took in the palm trees and the structure of the buildings...I watched as the Thai people sat together infront of their shops as they do every night...I love the way the steam rises from the noodle shops. I love the way the Thai people are always outside. At one point I just closed my eyes and listened to the sounds...and tried to burn in my memory of John and I on a bike together in Thailand.

Despite all the things that make living in Thailand hard for us...I find myself holding back what feels to be a waterfall of emotion...and tears...Oh the tears that will fall...I am so glad and I really really am excited about going on to America and walking into what God has for us but I will miss Thailand like a dear friend. It's quirks...it's characteristics...it's smell...I've come to love Thailand like I love my family and friends...deeply and unconditionally...quirks and all.

I believe we will come back but I don't know how long it will be...hopefully just a year or two...but God has not shown us that yet. Tomorrow is the day! We've almost got everything in order...we're going to have to pay overage fees but God knows and has provided.

You wanna hear something funny? Today I was packing our suitcases and I was weighing each one and I was just astounded and floored that each bag weighed 60kg!! Thats about 130 something pounds! We are allowed 15kg per person. That makes 60kg for our whole family and ONE SUITCASE weighed 60kg!!! I could not believe it...I was almost in tears...because I have thrown away...and given away sooo much stuff that I would have loved to have kept close. I had worked so hard and been so cut throat only to find that we were still way over and it was going to cost close to $1,000 dollars to pay for this much overage.

After packing and mulling this through for about 2 hours...Christina said..."Steph are you sure you aren't reading the pounds?" Then it dawned on me!!! I was....I so was! It was like a huge burden was lifted instantly!!! I screamed and thanked Jesus! LOL! So instead of having to leave more stuff behind...we'll be back to our expected $250 overage fee. It's a lot but much better than $1,000 don't you think? Especially when you don't have it!

I felt sooooo...uhhh...how do you say....ummmm....STUPID! Actually I prefer to call it stress induced lack of awarness...hehehehe...So be praying for us during this journey. We are excited and very very tired and our journey hasn't started yet! I'm so excited to see my family and friends!! I can't wait to hug my mom, see my wonderful in-laws and squeeze my bestest friends!!

I'll update you as soon as I can after we arrive. Thanks for reading! I want to encourage you to think about Jesus...my heart has been heavy laden for the ones who have been decieved and have put their focus on other things...good things...like taking care of their family...going to church...ministry...or going through their check list...and their focus has shifted from the most important thing in life. Our Savior...and time with Him.

I love Christmas time...remember the Prince of Peace, wonderful counselor, the lamb that was slain...the light of the world...the one that changed your life...refocus brothers and sisters...reFOCUS!

Only Love Remains - JJ Heller
Scenes of you come rushing through
You are breaking me down
So break me into pieces
That will grow in the ground
I know that I deserve to die
For the murder in my heart
So be gentle with me Jesus
As you tear me apart

Please kill the liar
Kill the thief in me
You know that I am tired of their cruelty
Breathe into my spirit
Breathe into my veins
Until only love remains

You burn away the ropes that bind
And hold me to the earth
The fire only leaves behind whatever is of worth
I begin to see reality
For the first time in my life
I know that I’m a shadow
But I’m dancing in your light

Teach me to be humble
Call me from the grave
Show me how to walk with you upon the waves
Breathe into my spirit
Breathe into my veins
Until only love remains

READY!

2008-12-18T00:08:00.001-08:00

Josiah: Momma, I just want to give Joss some chicken ok?

Momma: No...babies like Joss don't have teeth...at least not yet...

Josiah: Ok...I'll just let her lick the chicken then...k?

Momma: No...that's not ok.

Josiah: Cause babies like Joss don't have tongues?

HA!

****************************************************
Our time here in Hat Yai has been God's timing...when we weren't able to get the tickets for the day we wanted and were delayed a whole extra week we were disappointed but now we see that God is truely in control of our lives.

We have been getting things done and going through our stuff and I'm shocked that I'm finding so much stuff that I just can not part with. I found a folder of Josiah's art since he was old enough to hold a crayon...and there are some serious master pieces in there! I found a book of notes that John and I had written to each other while we were dating...I found an old sketch book of John's that he's kept since he was 14...and so many other things.

I could go on and on. The insane thing is that our luggage is already over weight!!! The airline...AIR ASIA....are quite simply crooks...ok so maybe that's a little too strong. But that sure is how it feels. They only allow 15kg per person which is 33 pounds. It's known as a trap...because usually if you pack LIGHT...ONE suitcase weighs 33 pounds. And you are allowed 2 suitcases....so you almost always end up paying for a whole bag per kg. Imagine moving...all that you have...and having to choose only 33 pounds worth of stuff...

It's INSANE! Yesterday I was sifting through stuff and I just had to keep saying out loud..."all for you Jesus"...and at times I would say "it's just stuff...it's all gonna burn eventually anyway...right?"....ugg....I believe we're just going to have to pack up some boxes and leave them here in Thailand and when we have the money...send for them.

That's our best bet right now...It's a good thing to experience...I think. It would be great for everyone to have to let go of STUFF...all of it...except for what you can fit in a suitcase...it's HARD but freeing.

Enough about that...aye? hehehe...We're counting down the days...our journey begins in 3 days!!! As my excitement about returning and seeing family and friends grows so does the hurt in the pit of my stomach about leaving Thailand. It's hard to describe but...we, as a family, are ready. God has been moving and really ministering to us and preparing us. We're ready...Ready for what God has planned and ready to step into it.

Church last Sunday was wonderful - Clinton Garsee shared and encouraged the body and at the end some of the Thai people who have been saved came up and with tears streaming down their faces they said "Thank you for bringing me a tract!!!". It was sooo awesome...and moving!

Ooop...time is out...have to cut this blog entry short. Thank you for reading and praying for us! Please keep us in your prayers! Here is some pictures from the last few weeks...there are quite out of order...sorry... :)

Waiting to check our luggage onto the train...

Is the train here yet Momma??

Josiah saying goodbye to Khruu Ruchada

Jude having fun on the train...

The view outside our window...

While we were very cramped...I think Jude's sleeping buddy...Puppy...had it the worst...

Jude in a cute costume Grandmaw sent him...

Jude and Nawng Awe playing the day before we left...

The one picture of the yard sale I got...man it was crazy! :)

Quick...quick...update

2008-12-09T09:29:00.000-08:00

We made it to Hat Yai/Baan Phrut...We got our tickets! The Blakes are coming to America on the 23rd of December! Pray for us!! Things are tough but our eyes are set on Him!

PS - The Blakes on the Move.....??? What do you think...new title for our blog?

From my heart...

2008-12-02T16:24:00.001-08:00

You know, for the past two weeks...while we have not been studying Thai anymore and have not had any duties except for to continue to pray, shine our light and prepare to move what we have to Hat Yai before returning to America - I feel as though I have been busier than ever.

I do believe we are making the transition from having two children to three. Jossalyn is no longer his adorable itsy bitsy baby just laying there...content to be able to see us. She is a full blown...beyond adorable 7 month old that has to be in the action too! Jude has developed into such an incredible 3 year old...it's like on his birthday he made a concious decision to grow up a whole years worth in one day!

Josiah has matured so much over this past week it's amazing! As I sit here...Jossalyn is wheeling around in her walker grabbing things out of suitcases. (Intermission: 10 minute diaper change) Jude is getting his daily dose of 101 Dalmations...that boy LOVES that movie! Josiah and Daddy are still asleep...it's 7:37.

The past week we've have another breakthrough...but one I don't write about too often. Have you ever just felt like the worst mother EVERRR?? Well, I have...I was speaking to another homeschool mom last night and she was like...excuse me that's MY TITLE...I think we've all felt like that at someone point or another...and then there's the other half of us that feel like that EVERYDAY! LOL!

Naw...it's not that bad but during this time...during this season...it's been rough. All the changes and Josiah learning that he must obey no matter what house or country we're in...and Jude learning how to deal express himself and his frustrations with his brother...and learning that sneaking around is not safe and NOT ACCEPTABLE!

Well, this week it just seems like we've finally broken through!!! The house has a different feel because peace and love reigns in stead of frustration and attitude. Am I saying I think the battle is over? NOPE...it's just over for this season...and I'm oh so happy about it.

During all the things that have been going on in Bangkok and in other parts in Thailand it's like God has been protecting me from focusing on that stuff. I imagine it something like a father who knows that bad things are going on either side of his baby girl and he just keeps snapping his fingers...whistling and calling the focus of his child to be on him and him alone. In his gaze there is peace and comfort, TRUST and PURPOSE.

Many of the missionary moms last night kept asking if I was doing ok...they seemed to think that the hard part was all the train rides, the moving, the selling, the unknown of if when we can get tickets, the airplane rides...and then settling back down just to pick up and move again in 2 months once in America to somewhere we're not familiar with...they were all concerned about my sanity...and to be completely honest...for the first time I didn't need to say..."Just pray for me..." in that way that lets people know that I don't feel up for the challenge but that's what's going down...so I'm gonna bit my lip...take a deep breath and press in.

Instead I just looked at them and said "yes! I'm fine!" It felt so good to just say...I'm fine. While it's two words it means so much more...it means "It's ok. I'm not stressed...I don't feel like this is hard...We're ready...I have peace...I have joy...I have happiness....I am full of faith...We trust God..."

The only sorrow or sadness I feel is in leaving Thailand itself. I love this country and I LOVE the missionaries that are serving in it. It hurts my heart that I won't be here during these turbulant times...but at the same time I am excited to go home to my America...my family...my friends who are pretty much like family...

I am encouraged and full of excitement about ideas God has given me about helping missionaries. I'm asking God to enable me to ignite a fire in the church back home to take on missionaries in a new way. The churches who have supported us back home have loved on us and cared for us so deeply...and it meant, at times, LITERALLY the world to us. That love, shown through emails and calls, at times a box...kept us strong...knowing that we're not alone in this battle.

I have so many ideas...some that are so small...such as getting kids magazine subscriptions coming and sending them to the missionary kids that I know...that would be such a humongous treat for any missionary kid I know...and mean the world to the parents. Have a missionary prayer website so that missionaries can come and submit specific prayer requests...and even bigger ideas such as a gift box system - guaranteeing that missionary families at least get 2 boxes a year. I wish I could express how much boxes mean to most missionary families...it's not the stuff...well, sometimes it is...especially if it's velveeta cheese...but it's the love that is put into the box...

Make a way so that any missionary mom who has trouble getting curriculum for her children can...and maybe a missionary support group online that helps with culture shock...raising children on the mission field...taking care of a family on the mission field...knowing what you're up against and recognizing it before it bites you on the b-HIND.

I don't know how or when...but my heart burns to be an advocate for missionaries in America. To draw attention to the need for support - financially, spiritually and emotionally. If people would take on one missionary family personally (as many have with us) and think of their children...send a toy...special candy from America...a bi -weekly email that is not generic...send 20-30 a month...WOW...if every Christian family would adopt a missionary...how incredible. What a support for some of those who are fighting so far away from home...

So...back to TODAY...we're all packed and we'll be leeeavving on a jet train...wait? I mean...leaving on a train at about 2 today - which is an accident by me. We're on an overnight train on purpose! I was supposed to buy tickets for the latest leaving train there was...but alas...I bought the earliest leaving over night train. What does that mean for us? 6 hours of entertaining a 6, 3 and 7 month old instead of 2 hours! But...it's ok...it's an adventure!!!! RIGHT?!?!?! hehehee...yeah it is and it's going to be fun...

We will arrive in Bangkok tomorrow morning sometime and wait at the train station for about 6 hours to catch our next overnight train which will take us to Hat Yai. But please be praying because last we heard Hat Yai was flooding and the trains might not be able to get through. We are pretty sure that the waters should have gone down by the time our train needs to pass through...but this flood is worse than the one we had the second year here...and THAT was bad. At one point our team was out on an inflatable boat delivering water, rice and formula to homes.

Once we arrive...we will settle into the church down there and start going through our home and selling what we have. We want to get tickets for the week of the 15th but after everything has happened I have been told that some people are being told there is a wait from 3 weeks to 2 months. I don't know which is right...I'm praying that we can get tickets as soon as we get there and leave during that week.

I'm sooo excited about getting to see our team...it's been over a year!! Josiah squeels everytime I tell him that he gets to see Asia and Mercy. Jude is just excited about the train right now although he is having a hard time with all the change. Yesterday he would walk around the house going "TOYS??...TOYSS?!??!?! We're we goin Mom? House all gone?!?! Goin on a train?? I wanna go on the train....wheh my TOYS Mom??" All of that said with quite a 3 year old strained voice. Poor baby...but we love on him and explain for the 20th time and Josiah helps a lot.

Josiah is gonna be the most flexible man when he grows up...man! Welp, it's now 8:13...Josiah is awake...Joss is back to sleep...Jude is still taking his Dalmation dose and I have a husband to waken and many things to prepare...so thank you for coming by and for thinking of us and praying for us throught his transition.

Please forgive me if I have not replied to your email. Sometimes I only have time to check my emails and then by the next day I forget to write back. Sometimes I remember emails that I haven't replied to (and they've been pushed down pass my view by junk emails or whatever) as I'm laying in bed trying to get to sleep and i try to make a mental note to reply tomorrow but recently...my mental notes don't work so good.

I'll write as soon as I can after our 2 day journey and share all the train pictures with you! Oh and the PAD protesting group won! The current political party has been resolved and the prime minister has been forced to step down - no one in that party can be involved in politics for 5 years. An interim prime minister has been installed and there are discussions of an election that will elect a new prime minister within 30 days!

Amazing! They plan on releasing the airports and resume flights by Friday which will be a huge task because the airport was a free for all while the protestors were there...there is no telling what has to be done to make the airport operational. The director of the airport made a plan to have the airport cleared and open by Friday...He called the plan a birthday gift for King Bhumibol, who turns 81 on Dec. 5.

I could write a whole other post about all that but...alas....time is UP! Again, thank you for coming and reading and for praying....thank you.

Check this out just for fun. Josiah went out and did this himself...it's bad quality because I had to resize it to upload it. We edited it...don't miss the ending song:

News from here...

2008-11-29T22:50:00.000-08:00

Hi everyone...I'm going to give a real post from me today...instead of these quickies...but for now here is the lastest news about what is going on here in Thailand. Please pray for Thailand, our family and most of all for Renee and her family.

Todd is out of the country on a trip to the underground churches in many surrounding countries and he is unable to fly back into BKK as of right now. He's due to return on Monday...but the airport will be closed until Monday night at least...that is if the governments plans go as planned but so far their police efforts to oust this group from the airport have been smashed.

here's a good article on the whole situation:
Thai Business Leaders Tell Premier to Step Down Amid Protests
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By Suttinee Yuvejwattana and Daniel Ten Kate

Nov. 30 (Bloomberg) -- Thailand’s business leaders said Prime Minister Somchai Wongsawat should step down to end a siege at the nation’s main international airport, which has paralyzed travel and threatens a million jobs in the tourism industry.

Bangkok’s Suvarnabhumi airport remained shut for a sixth day as negotiations failed to clear thousands of protesters who are demanding Somchai’s resignation. Violence escalated in the past 24 hours, as demonstrators attacked police with steel bars near the airport and a blast at a government compound in the capital wounded 34 people.

“We’ve asked the government to resign or dissolve the parliament because we think this is the best way out,” Pramon Sutivong, chairman of the Thai Chamber of Commerce, said today.
The call from the Chamber of Commerce increases the pressure on Somchai, who has been holed up in the northern city of Chiang Mai because of concern that growing protests in the capital may lead to a coup. A pro-government group plans to hold a rally in Bangkok today, increasing the likelihood of a bloody clash that may force the army to intervene.

“This situation can’t go on for long” Pramon said. “It will soon lead to violence, forcing the military to come out to stage a coup again. We all want to avoid that.”

An emergency order imposed on Bangkok’s airports and Government House has empowered police to clear the areas, though Somchai has said the government won’t use violence against the protesters. About 750 flights a day can’t get in or out of Suvarnabhumi, Asia’s fourth-busiest airport with as many as 100,000 passengers a day, the airport operator’s data shows.

Police Attacked

Negotiations to clear demonstrators failed yesterday, and violence broke out when 500 protesters armed with steel bars stormed a 150-strong police checkpoint. Police officers jumped into vans and sped away after demonstrators attacked the vehicles and threw firecrackers.
Somchai said yesterday he was willing to negotiate with protesters, if they lifted demands for his resignation and the dissolution of the government. Police efforts last month to clear demonstrators killed one person and injured hundreds.

Early today, an explosion wounded 48 people at the compound, said Winner Dachpian, a spokesman for the protesters. Nine people were sent to hospital, with three in critical condition, he said. A bomb was thrown into the site, the TNN television news network reported. Similar blasts have occurred in recent weeks.

Thai Army Chief Anupong Paojinda last week called for early elections to end six months of deadly protests.

Fresh Elections

The People’s Alliance for Democracy, composed mostly of the Bangkok middle class, royalists and civil servants, accuses Somchai of being the proxy of former premier Thaksin Shinawatra, who was ousted in a 2006 coup by Anupong and other generals. The group has rejected calls for fresh elections and said it wouldn’t leave the airport until the government steps down.

“If you can’t manage the country you have to resign,” Phongsak Assakul, vice chairman of the Thai Chamber of Commerce, said by phone during a 14-hour bus ride to Bangkok from Hat Yai in southern Thailand. “Let the elected parliamentarians form a new government. If that government can’t govern, then let’s go have another election.”

An election may return the ruling party to power. Parties linked to Thaksin have won four elections since 2001 on strong rural support for its platform of cheap health care and village loans. The protesters want a new political system that prevents the return of Thaksin’s allies by diluting rural votes.

“One possible way out is to find a neutral person who’s universally acceptable to be the new prime minister,” said Ajva Taulananda, the Thai Chamber of Commerce’s honorary chairman and vice chairman of Charoen Pokphand Group. “This way, we will see a break from the political squabbling,” he said in a phone interview.

Travelers Stranded

Suvarnabhumi’s closure has stranded thousands of travelers in the Thai capital. Repatriating them, and returning the 50,000 Thais stranded overseas, may cost 1 billion baht ($28 million) and take as long as a month, Deputy Prime Minister Olarn Chaiprawat said, Agence France-Presse reported yesterday.

“People are losing trust in the Thai people,” the Chamber of Commerce’s Phongsak said. “It really damages the tourist industry, not only hotels and airlines, but also restaurants, guided tours, lots of people.”

Thailand is allowing airlines to use a naval base in the east of the country to repatriate stranded travelers.

Cathay Pacific Airways Ltd. warned of “chaotic” conditions and long lines at the military airfield.
The carrier, Hong Kong’s biggest, is one of about a dozen airlines using U-Tapao Airport, east of Bangkok near Pattaya. Japan Airlines Corp. and Singapore Airlines Ltd. were also using the facility, more than two hours away from Bangkok.

Airport Congestion

“There has been congestion because this airport wasn’t built to serve such a huge number of passengers,” Chaisak Ungsuwan, director general of the Air Transportation Department, said today. The airfield handled more than 100 flights yesterday, he said. Suvarnabhumi handles 600 daily flights.

The international airport in Bangkok will remain closed until Dec. 1, Airports of Thailand Pcl said yesterday.

Finance Minister Suchart Thadathamrongvej said the protests and airport closures may cause damage amounting to about 100 billion baht this quarter.

“The prolonged political gridlock will drag on our economy and create unemployment,” said Pramon, the Chamber of Commerce chairman. “We just hope that we can grow 3 percent next year, even though the hope is quite dim now.”

It's Yard Sale time!

2008-11-28T18:07:00.000-08:00

Today is our yard sale for the little bit of stuff we have here in Chiang Mai...Josiah is sooo excited because I told him that he could sell his books...(after I have picked through the ones we need to take back for homeschool). He can not wait to have his own section. Things still aren't resolved in BKK...I haven't heard anything more about the protestors downtown here in Chiang Mai.

Come back for some pics and more updates...Sorry so short...

The unrest has hit Chiang Mai

2008-11-26T22:20:00.000-08:00

Previous events were elsewhere but they have now reached Chiang Mai. The current Prime Minister landed in Chiang Mai and all of the PAD protesters were here to "demonstrate". They have occupied the airport in Bangkok causing it to shut down and here in Chiang Mai they are "demonatrating" downtown.

Their demonstration included killing a 60 year old man by dragging him out of his car and killing him. He was active in politics...under the guy they are fighting against. This group has tried not to be violent...I'm confused as to why this man was killed. Even at the Bangkok airport...the toursits that are literally stranded in the airport are being helped by the protestors. They are giving the stranded tourists food because the airport shut down all restaurants and currency exchange vendors.

We are not in any danger at this time. We are located away from downtown and won't be going there. Please pray for Thailand. These are such turbulant times for Thailand...We will be taking a train to Hat Yai on Dec. 3rd but we must go through Bangkok and be there for 6 hours before our next train leaves to take us to Hat Yai...

Please be praying that this is cleared up by that time. They seem to want to mess with transportation services because it hurts the country the most because it's such a touristy place. We are planning on returning the week of Dec. 15th.

We pray that things are better by that time...for the sake of Thailand and for our travels.

Here are some links about what's going on:
http://edition.cnn.com/2008/WORLD/asiapcf/11/26/thailand.protests.airport/?imw=Y&iref=mpstoryemail

http://www.bangkokpost.com/

http://www.nationmultimedia.com/

Congo's crisis worsens - wow...please look...

2008-11-25T03:42:00.001-08:00

I was so overwhelmed by these photos. Especially the one of Furah. A woman with her 18 month old baby strapped to her chest while carrying a huge bundle of wood that she travels 16kms to sell...through extremely dangerous areas.

Wow...I don't know hardships...please look...be informed...take action...pray.

Congo's crisis worsens - The Big Picture - Boston.com

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REVERSE CULTURE SHOCK!

2008-11-22T18:28:00.000-08:00

This post was copied from John Lamberts blog. John and his family are in training to come to Thailand as missionaries. They will be here in about 3-4 months. I have been following their training in a jealous sort of way...haha...since we had none...and am in awe at the things that they have been learning...and the oh SO TRUE truths that John and Jaqueline both have managed to write out. Please pray for them as they are returning to America from Mexico (their training grounds) to prepare to leave for Thailand in a few months...it's no small feat....while there is joy...it's hard in many ways...

Like I said they are able to write out what I could only think...This is not easy to do!! This is an example...I would never have been able to describe it better (there is also this article that is indespensible and describes many times what we've been through and felt over the past 4 years: HOW TO PRAY FOR A MISSIONARY):
********************************
Mission Blues: Beware of Re-Entry Stress!

Short Term Missions Re-Entry Stress
This is the process that you may experience upon returning home. Re-entry stress or reverse culture shock, generally is experienced to a greater degree the longer one has been in another country. Disillusionment with America and American Christianity play a part in any re-entry stress that is experienced.

Initial ReactionsIf this is your first trip outside your home country you will be exposed to things you have never experienced first hand before, such as the plight and poverty of many in developing countries. It is not uncommon upon returning home to become disturbed and even bitter toward America’s opulence and waste.When you return you will be excited to eat the “Big Mac and large fries” you have been craving. Your family and friends will be proud and excited to see you an you will experience a “high”.

You have just conquered the unknown, been used greatly by God and you will be the center of attention. Soon, however, this “high” drops and re-entry shock may begin.Following are a few examples of possible reactions you may experience. Be prepared to deal with life back home inlight of your new experience. All short-term ministry/missions workers will experience some degree of re-entry stress.

1. Self-concept – Any life-changing experience can cause you to re-evaluate who you are in light of the experience. Questions about the meaning of life and its direction may be a part of the re-entry process. You may decide never to go outside the United States again or you may discover that there is a call on your life to ministry outside the United States. Questioning life can be good, but the uncertainty of the answers may cause some stress.

2. Value Change and Choice – Clashes between you and those to whom you return may occur in several different area, such as material possessions, family life, racial prejudice, national priorities in ecology and politics, and Christian community conflicts. Some workers develop a “holier than Thou” attitude towards those who did not go.

This can lead to you becoming disillusioned with Christians at home and cause you to consider them more tolerant of sin and not as committed as the Christians you met while outside the United States.One missionary worker returning home, from the Far East, shared:

“Everybody looks rich. We stayed with good friends in a Western state who complained about the high cost of living. Yet, they are overweight and live like royalty. Many of them were talking about inflation and how they were having to cut corners…but most were wasteful and kept on buying. Why is air-conditioning kept so low? We freeze everywhere we go.”

You may face the problem of integrating what you have just seen with what you see around you at home. Your eyes may be opened to the shallowness of Western Materialism and you may want to react by telling others they are wrong to own so many “things”, eat so much food and waste so much.

3. Expectations – You will have had many expectations for your trip about the culture and language differences, the new and exotic country and God’s purpose for you making the trip. However, you may not have expected the reactions you may encounter when you return home. You may find that you feel like a stranger now in your own country.

You may have expected your family and friends to be as excited as you are about your experience and become hurt if they show little or no real interest about something that has made a tremendous impact on your life. Realize that many will just not be able to understand what you have been through. This seemingly lack of interest can reinforce in you an opinion that American Christians are just not interested in the rest of the world and are simply lovers and pleasers of self. You must guard yourself from becoming resentful toward family, friends and American Christians.

4. Sense of Loss – You may experience a sense of loss over newfound friends and places or from being disconnected from the rest of the team. Your recent experience is not the nitty-gritty reality of everyday life. Being in a strange country, away from all familiar cues and the security of familiar faces and places can facilitate a tendency to become extremely close to fellow team members an when you return home you may experience a sense of void. It may take sometime to readjust to your life as it was before your trip.

You may also feel a loss of purpose and self-importance. God has just used you greatly to minister to the needs of others in a different country and when you return this purpose may seem somewhat lessened.

STAGES OF RE-ENTRY

1. Initial Euphoria -- You are pleased to be home and everyone is glad to see you.

2. Irritability and Hostility – After the initial euphoria you may become irritated and hostile towards others for any number of reasons.

3. Gradual Adjustment – It may take time for you to readjust to the way your life was before your trip.

4. Adaptation – You have been changed. Life went on when you were gone and it may take time for you to catch up.

RESPONSES TO REVERSE CULTURE SHOCK

To minimize the effects of re-entry stress find methods of “closure”. One example is to stay in touch with other team members after returning home. Be sure you should share things about the present with them and not just the memories of your trip. See your experience realistically and allow God to show you how to use this use it. Have a right perspective of God’s total plan.

POINTS FOR YOU TO CONSIDER:

1. Be aware that you may experience some depression, loneliness, fatigue and illness as re-entry symptoms of stress. You can be stressed by either happy or sad events. You may go through a grief process.

2. Be alert to your own expectations and the expectations of others. Value conflicts may occur.

3. Allow for rest, reflection and rejoicing in what you have seen God do. Go over your experiences and ask the Lord to show you the various aspects of your trip and grow from them Evaluate what you have been through.

4. Take your time to readjust. Be patient with others who do not understand what you have experienced. Adapted from: http://www.globalawakening.com/Brazil2001/cultureshock.html

Last, but not least, don't make any life altering decisions when you are going through this normal re-entry process.This is a great time to keep your devotional life with God strong and pray for wisdom on how to process your experiences the right way.

WATCH THIS PLEASE!

2008-11-21T06:03:00.000-08:00

Thanks Angie Miller! Love your blog!

Kate and John Mark...

2008-11-21T05:25:00.000-08:00

Kate has done it yet again...check out her blog: http://katemcdonald.wordpress.com/. I highly recommend her blog...I love it!

You know when you find a new cd you tend to leave your most favorites a side for a bit...well, that's what I did when I found JJ Hellers music...but Kate's post made me miss my everyday favorite that has been not so everyday for a while now.

But John Mark McMillan is back in my playlist and I am just loving it. He sings with such passion and his lyrics are so deep and real. He reminds me of a modern day Keith Green in some ways...not all...but some. So if you don't know who John Mark McMillan is then check him out here: The John Mark

Or on MySpace: John Mark McMillan

Or you can sit here a bit and listen to my favorite song Ashes and Flames.

White Christmas?

2008-11-18T18:25:00.000-08:00

Well, I have some wonderful news! We have a place to lay our head thanks to an awesome ministry in Whitesboro, Texas of a wonderful church First Baptist Church Whitesboro. The missions house that we stayed in when we were in America to have Joss had a cancellation and the house is now available for us to use until we move to Denver, Colorado in February! Wow!

I have such a fond feeling for this house and it will be such a pleasure to be able to stay there again...I would never have expected this but God knows all and is once again taking care of our needs. I am excited about being Whitesboro again....even though it is a small town it really has some great qualities. It's very homey and best of all it is home to one of my best friends and another awesome church called Pathway.

Our plans as of now is that we will be packed up and on a train by next week. We will be taking two over night trains...One from Chiang Mai to Bangkok and another one from Bangkok to HatYai. We will leave at about 4:30pm and be on the train until about 6am...then be in Bangkok until 3:10pm...when we will then get on another train until 7 or so the next morning. I'm going into it with three kids and 9 pieces of luggage thinking...THIS WILL BE AN ADVENTURE! I'm kicking all negative thoughts about this trip out of my head or I might run away screaming! hehehe...

Once in Hat Yai we will hopefully stay in the church there and begin going through and selling everything. This is going to be rough because it will be close to the same as when we left America the first time. Not the same though. Getting rid of everything you've worked on and had for most of your life is a lot different from getting rid of everything that you've had for the past 4 years. Except for what will fit into 9 suitcases that is...

But I look forward to it and it looks like we'll be HOME FOR CHRISTMAS! :)

Yesterday my Thai teacher came over to teach me 3 more Thai dishes and we had so much fun together. My teacher, Pii Khamm and I sat at the table and as we were eating our magnificantly made food I just about cried. I am going to miss them so much...I'm going to miss the way Thai people love to sit down...on the floor or at a table and share their food together.

I love how fun loving they are and I love how my teacher and Pii Khaam love Jesus. I'll miss the way it feels to "open up my house" in the morning and hear all the Thai men in the neighborhood clearing their throat in the morning...or the sound of someone using their pestle and morter to make their breakfast...and OH the smells of Thai breakfast...

LOL...I will miss all the insane looking bugs we find and going to the market...I love the market. Although...I won't miss the butcher handing me my money with nasty meaty hands. How nice it will be to not to have to worry about cross contamination and if my meat might be spoiled because it's been sitting out with flies all over it for a few hours....

You wanna know something kind of crazy? Yesterday we discovered that a lanturn is lodged in our electricity pole...gosh what is that called in English? You know where all the wires come together. Anyway, it's crazy dangerous...going to call someone about it today. The Thai guy who first noticed it said "just grab a really dry stick and get it down...". John and I just looked at each other and snickered at the thought. There is NO WAY we are getting anything and sticking it up in these horribly unstable electricity posts (oh someone help me out here...what are they called?). Usually when it rains we have a power outage because of the shear instability of the electrical design here.

Now how would a lantern get way up there...well the Thais just recently celebrated Loy Krathong. While it fills the sky with beautiful lanterns and creates a moving starry sky like many will never see in their lifetime...it is horrible at it's roots. They also send off floating lanterns in the river.

Apart from venerating the Buddha with light (the candle on the raft), the act of floating away the candle lantern is symbolic of letting go of all one's grudges, anger and defilements, so that one can start life afresh on a better foot. People will also cut their fingernails and hair and add them to the raft as a symbol of letting go of the bad parts of oneself. Many Thai believe that floating a krathong will create good luck, and they do it to honor and thank the Goddess of Water, Phra Mae Khongkha. (taken from Wikipedia)

Here's the one stuck in our post:

So...you tell me...would you grab a stick and try to fish that thing off of there?

My first Thom Yum...and boy was it YUM!

Yes...it looks like ramen noodles because it is! It's Thai ramen noodles mixed with all sorts of yummy stuff. This is such a delicious dish...some of the stuff in it is ground pork, tomatoes, carrots, onions, phak chi, spring onions a bit of a veggie called phak chi farang (no clue what it is). This dish is called Yaam Maamaa

This is Yaam Woonsein...it's made with glass noodles, carrots, tomatoes, onions and lots of different veggies, lime juice a tad bit of fish sauce...it's made very similar to the previous dish. The best part about these two dishes is that the only thing that is cooked is the noodles and the pork. The rest of it is completely raw and loaded with all the good stuff.

On a lighter note...LOVE THIS!

2008-11-17T07:17:00.000-08:00

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NOTE: This was posted by Stephanie Blake...and you can trust this link. Thanks Dawn!

My heart...

2008-11-15T10:03:00.000-08:00

Now that the cat is officially out of the bag I feel as though I can breathe again. Whether I should or not, I want to once again share my heart with you in complete transparency...I feel as though I can open my heart and blog again. For the past few weeks things have been so confusing at times and it felt like my heart would suffer a wound that would not be recovered from easily.

I went from complete trust to sorrow...then on to wonder and then to hope...and back to sorrow again but that time with despair lingering near. So much to think about and so little time...isn't that just terrible? Not the time part...but the "so much to think about" part.

It's a great thing to be able to think about stuff and try to figure it out in your brain...don't get me wrong but oh how we females love to plan and figure things out and OH how we let go of the guiding hand of our father when we prefer to think things out on our own rather than lock onto His eyes and trust that He will lead us safely down the path.

The TRUTH is that it is in Him that I place my trust. Not in the responses of others or the plans of man but in my faithful God. I have gotten so many loving emails from you and I can't tell you how much I appreciate them. I am still taking it all in breath by beautiful breath...but I am really excited about seeing you again and being able to have a more active part in your life.

Even though I know we will return someday...I feel as though I am grieving at times. Some precious awesome people that God brought our way while we were on furlough this last time said something that really stuck with John and I and I think it helps describe what I'm going through to a T.

They talked about how Abraham finally had been given his son...which was a promise that he had been waiting on...and waiting on...and he finally was able to grasp his promise in his hands and his promise was reaching maturity...and then what did God ask him to do with it? Sacrifice it...lay it down on the alter to God....

Did Abraham say "BUT GOD! This is MY PROMISE! I waited so long and here it is and you want me to give it up?" I feel the same way sometimes about leaving Thailand at this time. I feel like we've been working so hard and there have been many wonderful things that have happened and God has done some awesome things but we were and are ready to see even greater things. Because of our break throughs in language and excitement about Thailand we felt as if we were really more equipped vessels to be able to see revival fires sweep across Thailand...
It seemed as if we were stepping into our promise and now we are to give it up until God sees fit to send us back. What I've struggled with...in my lameness...has been...will I trust God's perspective. I know it's the ultimate perspective...he sees the big picture...while I'm zoomed in on Thailand...he's zoomed in on the world. Will I allow my dreams and my wants and my hopes to be subject to His plans and wishes? For they are far better than my own.

The answer is yes...of course it is yes! I love Thailand...I really do...like a friend that I've come to know and love for her weaknesses and beauty...but as great as this friend is and as deep as the love for her is in my heart...I fully trust His plans.

Above all else, I'm excited because this is what God has planned. I pray that we will stay focused and in Him enough to be dead to ourselves so that he can use us to the maximum in whatever he sees fit. There are so many unknowns and I'm glad about it. I'm glad that I can't make plans right now. I'm glad that I don't know where we will stay or how we will make it...I'm ever so glad that I don't know what Denver holds...I don't want to underestimate what God is going to do by my assumptions or plans.

I've been thinking a lot about what we've done in Thailand over the past four years and I'm amazed at what we've accomplished and been a part of...but even more than that I am amazed at the work that God has done in our lives. While we were on a mission for God...he was also on a mission masterfully working on us.

I realize now that we were in the prime position for God to move and mold our lives in order to change our stubborn flesh and etch himself upon our hearts. I yearn to maintain that position upon returning to the states. I yearn to continue to allow Him to be the reason I wake in the morning and that my day is about furthering the kingdom...

Don't get me wrong...a lot of my days are "off days" but because we set our hearts on being missionaries for Him and giving our lives for Him...we gave him liberties that at times when we are living our lives in America we just don't give. Upon returning to America...I will continue to put my trust, my hopes, my desires, my children, my husband...in summary...my life in His hands to do with as he pleases. I want to encourage you today in your life...as you are walking with Him.

What is it that you need to surrender to Him? Are you trying to figure everything out in your own strength? My husband said something tonight on the phone with a dear friend that I heard in passing..."It's not about you and how good you are and how well you live...if you've done enough...it's about Jesus and His grace. It's about the power that lives in you that enables you to do great things beyond yourself."

Trust God with your life...you won't be disappointed.
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And now for a few pics from the past week or so....

Yeah...I made this! Wahoo! Well, if my memory serves me correctly then many of you will be like...that looks like NASTYNESS...WHY would you be proud of that!?! It's DELICIOUS that's why! It's called Laap Moo...and maybe if you invite me to your house I'll make you some!

This is Josiah on our field trip to a silk factory...

Me and my big boy...

I believe his exact words were: "Oh yeah, I made this..."

This is hilarious to me. We decided to look up some games to play as a family in the evening times and we found this one called "Doggie Doggie where's your bone". So someone sits in a chair with a "bone" under their seat (can be any object that you can hide on your persons fairly easily) and that person is facing away from everyone else.

Everyone sits quietly...well, I barked for fun when I was it...but that's besides the point. Someone comes up and steals the bone...and once someone has it you say "doggie, doggie, where's your bone...some one took it from your home. Who could it be...maybe me..."

Then the "doggie" turns around and tries to figure out who has the "bone"(a tennis ball in this cae). In the picture above I caught a moment that I will cherish for many years to come...this is Josiah saying...I don't know who has it mommy...all the while thinking the ball is well hidden on his head! LOL!

We later played "honey, if you love me...you'll smile". By the way, don't play me in this game...you will LOSE! muahhahahaha...(just thought of you Barb...your family practicing your sinister laughs together...ha! Oh and I have not forgotten that I am tagged... :)

Beautiful Jossalyn...her nose is a little banged up...she tried to follow her brothers out the back door in her walker...
She looks sooo chubby in this pic! She's sitting up all by herself now!

This is Josiah totally FREAKING OUT about the bandaids that were sent from America in a box from our family at Liberty Lighthouse...I had NO CLUE this would be as huge of a deal as it was. Now every time I turn around someone "needs" a bandaid...even Jude goes around saying "owie...mommy...bandaid please"

Another huge hit...ring pops!

The Pruetts volunteered to take the kids to the Night Safari tonight...they had a blast...I'm so glad because I don't know how well I'd do with all 9 of those kids....

Me and my baby girl...oh she's sooo precious!

Jude staring down the lepord...he's so brave...

Little Jude is 3 years old TOMORROW! Happy Birthday my little brick! We love you sooo much and I'm in awe as I watch you grow into the unique and strong little boy that you are! MUAH!

Man makes his plans but God directs his steps...

2008-11-14T06:06:00.000-08:00

Dear blogging friends,

I've got butterflies as I publish this post tonight. We have some shocking news for you today…maybe not so shocking to the ones who have been asking God for clear direction for us. God has answered our prayers about what we are to do very clearly and very directly. We have been given an answer and there is no doubt about what we are supposed to be doing. I pray that as you read the next few paragraphs you hear our heart and most of all recognize that God has the full perspective.

We sent out a newsletter about 2 weeks ago regarding our current financial situation and to this moment the situation has not changed. There wasn’t much of a response to our newsletter and I was really surprised. No real communications regarding the situation was received nor were any donations made. We began to really seek God even more so.

A dear friend of ours, Micheal, was on the phone with John and it went like this:

Micheal: “So John…if you had the money what would you do?”
John: “Go down south as planned…”
Micheal: “So you wouldn’t do anything else?”
John: “No…the plan is to go down south to Narathiwat”
Micheal: “Ok…so is it possible that God could be not providing the money
because he knows that you are set on doing that and only that?”
John: “Hmmm…yeah, that’s possible…”

The following day John was riding home from Thai class and was praying about what to do and what action to take. His Thai teacher had encouraged him to remember and utilize all contacts that he has made in the past and he remembered that there was a guy from a church that we knew of that said if we ever needed anything big to contact him and he’d do what he could. We don’t have a direct way to contact him so John thought to himself…as soon as I get home I’ll message his daughter so I can get in touch with him.

As John was thinking about what he would say to the man about seeing if he could help us get moved and get a car, John thought “but if he gives us money…when we go back to America then we won’t be buying a car so we’d need to send the money back…” He was shocked that he even thought that. Going back to America has not been an option or a thought in the 4 years that we’ve been missionaries in Thailand. And yet this thought came to him as if it were natural and normal.

So he started really praying and putting everything before God… John said to God that he knew that he could choose to go anywhere and God would use him there…we could stay and work in Chiang Mai, or we could go work with in villages up north or we could go to a different country and God would use us there…my husband then prayed "but I don’t want that…I want what you want for me right now"

We want God’s will above our own and while our hearts are here in Thailand…our hearts are ultimately with God. God then reminded John of many things and then, as clear as day God directly told him that he was supposed to return to America and that it was time to work with his father…Curry Blake.

So yes, we are returning to America. We are not returning to America because we don’t have enough money. If we were supposed to move to Narathiwat or remain here in Chiang Mai then the finances would allow us to do so…but as of now we don’t even have enough financial support to sustain us month to month. Over the past 4 years we have seen God provide in miraculous ways and this time is no different that any other…God is completely able to provide but he closed that door. Man makes his plans but God directs his steps.

I know some of you have heard us talk before we returned to Thailand this time about our heart for Thai Muslims and that we knew we were supposed to return to Thailand and I believe we were. Our hearts are still the same toward the Thai Muslims and Thailand but ultimately our hearts are for God.

While some might not quite understand…we were supposed to return. These past 4 months have been like boot camp spiritually. It has been as if we have been in the blue flame of God’s refining fire. We know we have been being prepared for what is coming. We have had time to learn and glean off of our teammates…go through some really rough times…teaching us some lessons that can only be learned through the experiences we have had. We have also had significant breakthroughs in Thai language.

You ask…why is a breakthrough in Thai language significant if you are returning to America? It is significant because we believe and hope that one day we will return to Thailand. We have had major breakthroughs in our Thai language abilities and many breakthroughs in relating to Thai people and understanding culture that we didn’t even know we needed.

We believe we have had these experiences so that we are not leaving Thailand feeling like we aren’t able to make it here successfully but instead that God would send us off with feelings of victory so that our hearts would be prepared to return again someday…maybe in a few years…but that is up to God.

We have shared what God has shown us with our team and some other senior missionaries that we just happened to be able to spend time with when this happened and they prayed with us and agreed that this is indeed God…whether any of us like the idea of us leaving Thailand or not…it is what we are to do.

He knows we are willing vessels and even at this moment if He were to say stay…we would. But He has spoken clearly and we are confident and joyful about what God has planned and how he plans on using us. John is very excited about being able to work with his father.

About a month ago John and I were sitting down talking about the future as we do sometimes…thinking about 5-10 years ahead…where God could have us…ect. We were talking about if God sent us back to America and I asked John “What would you do in America John? There are no villages in America…” I said challengingly. He answered me quickly and confidently “I’d work with Native American Indians.”

I was shocked by his answer and said “What!?!”. He has never mentioned Native American Indians before. The next day while on Skype with John’s mother she told us about Curry’s most recent trip and about a prophecy that was spoken over him and in that prophecy it was said that Curry is going to do a great work among the Native American Indians amongst many other awesome words! My jaw hit the floor...I pointed my finger at John…like…did you already know that and he threw up his hands saying he had no clue! We both kept our mouths closed and gave it to God and assumed it was for the far in the future.

Over the past week we have been calling people to tell them this news the best we can with the time differences and we got an awesome confirmation after telling John’s sister about the news. She works for Curry also…she sends out all of his partner letters and she had just put the most recent partner letter in the mail the day before. She went on to tell us that toward the end of the letter Curry stated that he knew from the Lord that it was time for his son to come and travel with him and he asked his partners to pray with him that John would hear directly from the Lord regarding the matter.

John G. Lake Ministries is going to be moving to Denver, Colorado in February 2009 and we will also be moving there. We will be staying in Thailand until the end of December 2008. At the first of December we will move down to Hat Yai with the Pruetts to help in any way we can with their transition and stay in the church there…tying up any loose ends…until we leave at the end of December.

I know this hit some of you over the head like a huge brick…and we pray that you will love us through this time and continue to pray for us. We will not be returning back to Texas permanently as I always thought we would if we ever returned at all…and this will be a tough transition for us. Especially me, Stephanie.

My heart still hurts at the thought of leaving Thailand and not knowing when I will return. I will miss sooo many things I can’ t even begin…but just as there was pain in leaving family and friends behind on that first plane ride…there will be pain in my heart leaving this place that I have called home for the past four years…we will also be starting all over.

We will not have a bed on which to lay our head when we return. We will be trusting God to take care of us with the same amount of faith that we have had to trust him here with. While all of this seems a bit overwhelming…we want you to know that we are excited and confident in this new direction. John will be working with His father all over the US and in many other countries as well as working with His father in reaching out to the Native American Indians.

We ask that you lift us up in prayer whenever you think on us and that those who support us…we ask that you to continue to support us through this transition and then as God leads. We still have need of support in returning to America.

We believe we will return to Thailand someday and our lives are still in His hands. We will go where he leads as missionaries to wherever He sends us…even if it is nonconventional…we will go as missionaries to America and then onto wherever it is that He sends us. We still feel like missionaries but we’re just changing location. We will live our lives as missionaries in America...continuing to speak Thai to our children and raise them up to be mission minded.

Upon our return we understand that many Americans don’t understand or support the concept of missionaries to America but in truth that is what we will be…giving our lives to reaching the lost and equipping the body of Christ.

Thank you for loving us, supporting us and praying for us. Please do not stop praying for Thailand or for us. I would personally love to hear from you after reading this post. I will continue to post as things unfold and keep you informed...

With much love,
The Blakes
John, Stephanie, Josiah, Jude and Jossalyn

UMO visitation...that's short for HUGE ELEPHANT

2008-11-07T20:39:00.000-08:00

We saw a UMO (Unidentified MASSIVE Object) heading our way out the window...at second glance I saw that it was an ELEPHANT in our neighborhood. This is a first. So I get to report that this morning we were visited by an elephant! The thing would have come into my house if it were possible. It was sooo beautiful...and 6 months pregnant.

Here are some photos and I'll put up a video later.

The elephant at our gate.

We hadn't decided to open the gate yet...we were concerned about the temperment of the elephant. I was once almost seriously injured by a young spunky one downtown one time.

We opened the gate and in he came...he would have kept coming if that guy would have let him. Good thing he didn't go too much farther...would have knocked that guy right off.

This lady was so sweet and was practicing her english with us. She's holding sugar cane that you can purchase for 20 baht (about .58 cents) to feed the elephant.

As the elephant went on to wow some other people the guy stood up on his back. Josiah and Jude thought that was the coolest...

Urgent Prayer Request...

2008-11-03T06:29:00.001-08:00

Our family has an urgent prayer request for you and we ask that you click on this link to see our November Newsletter.

November Newsletter 2008

***Renee is fully recovered from Typhoid Fever and
is doing wonderful! Thanks for your prayers!***

2008-10-29T18:12:00.001-07:00

WOW! Thanks again Casey!

New Creation from Pace Hartfield on Vimeo.

2008-10-29T17:39:00.000-07:00

Thanks for posting this KATE and Casey!!

Rice farm/Buffalo Training Camp Fun!

2008-10-27T17:41:00.000-07:00

A few weeks ago a lady at the Co-op scheduled a field trip to visit a rice farm (Buffalo Training Camp). It was to have hands on experience on how to plow, plant and harvest rice and to learn about Thai culture. To say the least it was a blast...Here's the guy showing off his buffalo mounting skillz...

They are now doing a demonstration on how they grind sugar cane to get it's juices. As the buffalo goes round and round it grinds and presses the sugar cane.

After the rice is harvested it is then pound to remove the kernal.

Here is my Josiah. I can't tell you how shocked and proud I was of him. This is my boy that runs screaming from the table when his hands get dirty to hurry and wash them. I was prepared to coax and trick him into it but while I was away...changing my clothes to get in myself that boy jumped in! I didn't even get to see him do it! He was getting out when I walked up!!! I'm so thankful that one of the other mothers caught a few pics for me.

I love this and call me crazy but here is my little man learning to "put his hands to the plow".

This buffalo looked disgusting when we were done with it...ugk...

While we were there Josiah was hardly ever with the group. He was always off chasing the animals...wanting to pet them. Or checking something else out. Making his own way. Right before we left he said with great conviction "Momma...I've GOT to come back here." When asked why he responded: "Because I have to be here to help them when it's time to get the rice because I can help them do it faster! I'm good on a farm and the animals like me."

Yes I got in and let me tell you...it was suprisingly hard to smile. It felt DISGUSTING! Undescribably disgusting...Every step was what I imagine it would feel like to go wadding in a pond of poo...but who could pass up the opportunity to plow a rice field? Not me!?

They gave everyone an opportunity to get up on the buffalo. The kids loved it! It was an awesome experience for them...now for me...it was just embarrassing. Would I do it again if I had the chance...probably...but it was still embarrassing. All of my horse riding experience (which isn't much...and was a long time ago) went out the window when I attempted to mount that thing! I was laughing so hard I thought I was not going to be able to get up on that buffalo but despite the roaring laughter of everyone around me I persisted and up I went.

It wouldn't have been so hard if I had thought it through before attempting it but I just kind of layed over it for the longest time laughing. Or it felt like a long time. A handful of the other moms made a running jump from the back of the bull and jumped right on...I am NOT THAT kind of woman...I'd love to say I could jump up on the back of the horse or buffalo but uh...my present state of body is not capable of such a feat. I passed.
It was such a blast and an experience that neither Josiah nor I will forget. FYI - they no longer use buffalos to plow the rice fields - it is a forgotten pasttime that many Thai's are sad to see go. Almost all of the current generation of Thai's have never seen or plowed a rice field using a buffalo. They have machines for that now. List #208 of things to accomplish in life: Get knee deep in muck and God knows what else and plow a rice field....CHECK!

Warfare....Heart mover...

2008-10-26T07:55:00.000-07:00

I everyone! Ok...sooo...whew. It's been a rough 2 days! But it's better. I have spent most of the last 48 hours sleeping. Yeah...I said "sleeping". It was so rough I just felt like sleeping to escape thinking about anything. Is that the right way to handle things my friends? NO! (I am shocked that I was able to do so...in reality...it is not possible but my husband, sensing my mood seemed to move mountains to allow me to sleep) I would love to report to you that at the first onset of feelings of despair I hit my knees straight away and told that devil where he could go with his ugly thoughts...but...uhh...I didn't...

I thought it was just hormones trying to balance themselves out since I've cut WAY back on breast feeding. And then I thought it was just because it seemed extra hot that day and THEN it was because my boys were fighting more than usual that day...THEN it was because I just missed my friends in America...and then and then and then!

BAH! So this evening...way too late in the game if you ask me...I realized what was happening. I was standing there doing dishes...oh how I had to make myself do every single dish! I kept thinking about how nice it would be to wash dishes with hot water and how dare that shop stop selling the good dish soap...that actually cleans the dishes...instead of having to scrub each dish a gratillion times to get the grime off...uh...where was I? Oh yeah, there I was washing the dishes...HAPPILY! LOL...ok...that would be a lie...I was TOTALLY grumbling and complaining.

While all of these "pleasant" thoughts are rumbling through my head I just all the sudden thought of one of my favorite books of all time. "This Present Darkness" by Frank Perretti. I thought of the images that I had created in my head while reading that book...one in particular of this humble pastor fighting for his congregation...for his city...down on his knees, alone in his this small town sanctuary. Frank Peretti brings you into that small town sanctuary as if you were one of it's members and you can feel the heart of this pastor seeking heaven for his sheep.

The thing that really got me was the extreme warfare going on over someone praying. I won't give you any more than that...it's too awesome of a story but as I sat there...my dishes and I...and as I grumbled and shifted fighting my flesh...I realized - yet again I had let my eyes be turned to the side. For had I not, I would have seen everything as clearly as the sun on a cloudless day. I would have recognized the enemies first dart and stood firm against the coming onslaught. I thought about the yesterday evening and how I just laid in the boys bed until I made myself go to sleep...in the middle of the day. I was just desperate not to think about anything anymore.

Things have not been that BAD people! I just felt hopeless and just the day before I was talking to John about what a relief I had felt in the spirit and how I knew people have been praying...like a night and day difference...and then this. Now...I know it sounds like hormones and yeah, I'll give you 5% on that. But the other 95% was an attack. I won't go into detail about what all was causing all of this turmoil only to say that it is all lies. You can choose to look at your circumstances through the eyes of the world or through the eyes of our Father...one leads to hopelessness and the other to clarity, trust, happiness and joy.

I stood there at my little sink and started praying in my head until it flowed out of my lips with passion and fire as it should have when this began. I told the enemy I would not hear another word and I reminded him that we are the victorious ones and those who trust in the Lord will NOT BE MOVED! Commanded him and all of his to leave me and my family alone. He might have dominion over the neighbors but as long as we dwell in this house it is God's property and I nor any member of my family will be toyed with any longer.

I felt instantaneous relief. I finished the dishes and put the boys to bed then prayed over them. I know if I feel the effects of everything then they must feel it too - especially Josiah. Josiah has really been testing me lately...more than normal. They have been pushing limits of brotherhood and I just don't know what to think about it sometimes. I have a half brother but we're 10 years apart and I don't ever remember fighting except for one time when he hurt my feelings over something silly and I put a sign up that said "No brothers allowed" (remember that Bubba?). That was the extent of it.

John describes how him and his sisters used to fight all the time and sometimes he tells me that it's normal and I just take a breath and say...ok...and I remind myself that they are not perfect and I don't expect them to be and I can't expect them to act like adults...they are going to be selfish and self serving at times. If it's not Josiah it's Jude and vice versa. For the first time I am seeing them purposefully trying to get on each others nerves and doing spiteful things to each other and honestly it just eats away at me.

During these past few months I have realized more than ever that parenting is something that you have to approach with fear and trembling...knowing that you have to have God's help...you have to have wise council and you have to love beyond yourself. But what it comes down to is that it's our job as their parents to teach them what is right and wrong and to teach them the Word of God and allow God to do the real work/change on their hearts.

I've never been good at that. It seems like my whole life I've been trying to do God's job at changing hearts. I felt for sooo long that if I could just say the right words...give them the right tape...be there at the right moment THEN they would wake up and come back to Him...but it's never been about what I could do. It's been about what God can do and what that person wants to allow God to do. Yes you can be instruments used by God but He is the heart mover. Now with my little guys hearts...I know they are good...they are GOOD sweet boys...just not to each other recently. It's been really hard staying patient, kind and gentle...let me TELL YOU! But if at anytime I should be those things to my children...it should be now.

John returned home shortly afterward and I was so glad to see his face. He is my most cherished gift from the Lord...my children are so incredible but my John...I find comfort in His eyes and the creases on his face when he smiles. His laughter is contagious and in his arms I find rest. I find my ultimate comfort and rest in my Savior and I see the love of my Savior mirrored in my husband through security and all encompassing, unwavering love.

OK...too gooshy for ya? Sorry...So anyway, soon after all that I was able to speak to my good friend Shawna back in the states for a very short bit and it's always good to hear her voice and what God is doing in her life. She encouraged me even more just letting me know that people are praying and reading. When I started blogging I never thought it would be what it is today...

I would have never dreamed that it would be something so important to me. I THOUGHT it was just for family and friends back home to keep up with us but now I find it a tool to share my heart and to hopefully get into your mind and heart so that you would pray for us too! So thank you my blogging friends...all of you who read and comment and pray...it means the world to me. Thank you...

Come back soon to see me on a BUFFALO...! ha! Yeah, I said BUFFALO! AND please continue to keep Renee in your prayers (or Carrie as some of you know her). While she is not having fever like she was having she is now having some issues with her abdomin...I'll keep you updated.

With love,
Steph

Thai food!!

2008-10-25T01:49:00.000-07:00

A few days ago my teacher...Khruu Ruchada got the great idea to make some food for the Pruetts so I invited over to my house to make the food as to not make the Pruetts house busy with people and all that goes on with the amount of food we would be making. I had been wanting to have a Thai food cooking class with her anyway so off we went to the market after class.

That was sooo much fun...I wish I had had my camera. Next time I'll be prapared...we had so many vegetables and things that I thought that there was NO WAY we could carry it on our bikes but the Thai people can carry ANYTHING on their bikes. Khruu Ruchada spent about 5 minutes and had it all packed on to her bike just right! It was amazing...so she met me at my house...another teacher...Khruu Bhen came too to be the "luuk muu" which means or is the equivalent to the "helping hands"...the one who chops everything up and prepares everything...basically a prep cook. hehehe...

So...I took tons of pictures and learned how to make a few of my absolute FAVORITE Thai dishes. Are any of you interested in knowing the recipes? I can post them with the pictures of each of the vegetables that you have to have to make it...? Ok...so here we go:

Khruu Ruchada chopping up the veggies...

Khruu Bhen washing some veggies...

My first Khaow Phat ever! It was delicious...I know it looks like fried rice but it's not the same. Lots of yummy Thai tastes in there...and if I look hot...it's because I AM!!!

Our kitchen table was literally full of vegetables and stuff...

The extremely yummy fruit of our labor!!! The dish on the Left is called Penang Moo, Middle: Laap Moo and on the right is Grapow Moo. Moo is pork. The top dish is Khaow Phat Gai (chicken). It was all terribly delicious!

A few days ago we had the pleasure of having the Garsee boys over. These kids are soo cute...they are the adoptive kids of The Garsees that we used to work with in HatYai. The Garsees are in America on furlough and were unable to secure visas for their adoptive children to go also...so they have been staying with the Pruetts. This is Jude and Joseph.

Josiah and Bang...

The boys being silly...ha!

Aren't they all so handsome?

Josiah painting yesterday...

Renee...

2008-10-25T01:40:00.000-07:00

Renee is doing much better. She is recovering from Typhoid Fever. She still has fever but not nearly as high as it was before. Thank you for praying for her and check back here for a new post very soon!

Urgent Prayer Request...

2008-10-21T22:04:00.000-07:00

Renee...the wife of the other man that John works with (Todd) has Typhoid Fever. She has been to the hospital and has medicine and is resting now. This is a hard time for them right now as you can imagine...they are also taking care of 3 extra children on top of their 4 to help some dear friends while they are away in America on furlough. If you have been keeping up with my blog you have seen them already...Judah, Joseph and Bang.

Please keep the Pruetts in your prayers and us as well as we will be attempting to lighten their load and help as much as possible. Thank you!

First Green? Smoothie! October in Thailand...

2008-10-21T19:47:00.000-07:00

**********New Video*************

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I woke up and decided today would be the day to do it..make my first green smoothie... I've been feeling some anxiety about making my first green smoothie simply because if it really tastes bad I know that I won't make another one. ha! I'm just being honest....

So yesterday I stopped by the market to pick up some fresh greens just in case the ones I had bought had gone bad because I waited so long to tackle this endever. And I was right - I pulled out the greens I had bought and they were all turning yellow and limp...NO GOOD!

You wanna know something funny? I didn't know what kind of greens I had so I had to go online and find out what spinach and kale look like. I'm telling you guys I am not a health freak...I don't know about this stuff! But yeah...all of these greens were wasted, good thing all of those veggies cost only a $1:

I also bought some bananas at the market yesterday and after I got them home I noticed that the bananas were covered in ants so I sat them outside over night...and when I got it this morning...it had this huge chunk taken out of it. Kinda scary...wonder what made that hole?

So I got everything together and this is what went into my green smoothie...minus a little bit of the "kale". That's blueberries, raspberries and two chunks of fresh pineapple...three little bananas and about a cup of kale. I also put about 1/2 a cup of water to help it blend.

I started with all the fruit first...and I have to admit...I was liking what I was seeing:

And then........it turned out BROWN! AHHH! My green smoothie turned out to be a brown smoothie! Uh...so, after staring it down a while...I pushed all thoughts out of my mind and took a sip. I opened my eyes and said out loud "OK! I can do this!". Did I jump up and down and rejoice in the deliciousness of my creation? NO! But I believe it's only because I don't like lukewarm thick stuff. I don't eat ice cream if it's melted AT ALL...and this to me was thick, not cold enough and well, delicious! Didn't taste like green stuff at all!

I thought it was kind of funny that the only glass cup I had was a cocacola cup and it looks like a cocacola smoothie...anyway...so, it was good! I'm going to add ice next time to help it be more paletable...but yeah, WE CAN DO THIS! WAHOO! So, I drank lots of water and that's all I've had so far today and it's 10:33am and I'm not hungry.

If I do get seriously hungry I'm gonna eat an apple or an orange. I found this neat thing online and for health reasons I want to do this...don't think I'm going to do the whole colon cleansing thing...don't even know where to start with that...but as far as the exercising, eating and drinking...THAT I can do.

So pray for me...it won't be easy but I have to do this for my own health and for the future health of my family.

On another note - thank you soo much for those who are praying for us...today we can really feel the effects of your prayers...SERIOUSLY! John and I both woke up this morning feeling renewed and refreshed...trusting our God in everything. Thank you...thank you...thank you for praying.

This is also the most wicked month of all here in Thailand. Read what was going on last October here. There are so many things that go on during October...one of which is the vegetarian festival...which begins by signaling their 9 gods to come down to earth...you can read about it here.

You can also read about the parades that take place all over the country here: Parades This is a quote from the guy wrote the article that that link goes to:

"What did I see?
~ I saw guys cutting their tongues with straight edge razors.
~ I saw guys cutting their stomachs with hatches, razors, and swords
~ i saw guys running a sword up and down on their tongues
~ I saw a guy with a deer skull with antlers… an antler was through his cheeck.
~ I saw a guy with a modified bicycle frame with part of it going through his cheek.
~ I saw a few girls with metal rods through their cheeks.
~ I saw a guy with two hatchets (small axes) that was hammering the blade into his forehead
with the back of the other hatchet.
~ I saw a guy that was pierced with about 6 metal rods that went through his lips, neck and skin
near the shoulders.
~ I saw guys with spears piercing through both cheeks.
~ I saw groups of guys sit on the street in a circle and have a tongue cutting ceremony.
~ I saw grown men and women act like monkeys (they were supposedly possessed).
~ I saw girls act like infants.
~ I saw guys swinging swords, spears, Molly Hatchet blades, and everything else - wildly in the
air as if they were fighting off demons.
~ I saw approximately 500 people that were truly out of their minds.
~ I saw little kids of 2 and 3 yrs old watching the men cut themselves from as close as 2 meters
away.
~ I saw a little boy of about 4 years old run after his mother crying and trying to offer her some
water to cool her down as she walked in a trance like a Buddha - and then she pushed him
away from her when he got close.
~ I saw men and women dancing beneath thousands of falling firecrackers that were going off
over their heads, and under their feet, all around them.
~ I saw guys grunting, squealing, and making wretched sounds that I’d call animal-like or
demon-like."

What does that sound like to you? And this is what is going on all over Thailand this month. Please be praying. Thank you and I'll leave you with some funny pics and videos...

While the other pictures speak for themselves...I have to explain this one...ha! Uhh...this is what happens when I blow dry my hair...uh huh...crazy huh? I did NOT puff this out at all...and no I did not blow dry my hair with my head upside down. This is me attempting to straighten my hair by blow drying...every time I sit in a hair stylists chair they are amazed at how much hair I have...God gave me enough hair to spare for some reason. ha! So yeah, I put it up in a pony tail after this...and it looked like I had a lions mane stuck on the back of my head.

Jude...you have to see the video of this...he asked the funniest question...

God of this City - Pattaya

2008-10-18T18:03:00.000-07:00

I recently found out about a Thai Christian living in America. She, Sukalaya, wrote me through email and showed me her blog. Let me just tell you that it is such a blessing to see what God is doing in her life...I want you all that are reading to realized what happens when Thai people get truly saved...

Some of the most loyal, true followers I have ever met in my life. They know what it means to have a King...they know what it means to respect...and every true Thai believer that I've ever met lives for him passionately and with no compromise.

While I was reading her blog. I came across a post about a Christian band called Bluetree that was invited to Pattaya to sing in a club. Pattaya is much like HatYai in that it is filled with prostitutes and is run over by drugs, alcohol, western ways and sex. From what I read the band had no idea what they were heading into...and while they were there...amongst it all....in the middle of this club they began to sing this song: God of this City...declaring the truth over these people and this city.

This video really moved me...check it out and check out Bluetree. PLEASE BE WARNED THAT THIS VIDEO IS NOT APPROPRIATE FOR KIDS...AND SHOWS THE EPITOME OF A CITY DRENCHED IN SIN...

Please keep us in your prayers during this time....

Short Border Run video

2008-10-17T20:30:00.001-07:00

Stuck between two countries and how to sneak through borders undetected...ha!

2008-10-17T08:46:00.001-07:00

Yes...we were officially not in ANY country for about 2 hours yesterday! But before I explain here's a definition of what a border run is for those of you who don't know:

Border Run: the process of going out of Thailand and into another surrounding country and then turning around to go back out of that country and back into Thailand in order to get a stamp in your passport to validate and follow your visa and it's rules.

Our visa requires that we leave the country every 3 months and get a stamp in our passport to kind of keep tabs on us...I guess. The last day we were allowed in this country before having to do a "border run" was October 15th!

So on Oct. 15th as I was leaving for Thai class I saw that I had a txt message. I check it and it was Renee asking if I had to do a border run soon. My heart leaped out of my chest. I hadn't been using the calendar that I made the note in to remind myself. I ran in and check our passports and sure enough Oct. 15th was the day we were supposed to go to the border.

There was no possible way to find a ride and get to the border before it closed that day so we had to plan for the next day. This was our first border run to Myanmar...down south we go to Malaysia for our border run. If there had been any possible way for us to go that day..we would have because we had to pay a late fee. The fee is 500 baht a day per adult. So we had to pay 1,000 baht ($30) fee.

Us taking a break after 2 hours in the car...no I'm not annoyed...I just look that way...

I started really looking around and trying to find a van that does the run everyday like in HatYai (where we used to live) but I couldn't find one! The only way we were able to go was by paying a taxi friend of ours to take us (3,000 baht = $90). We had 1,000 in the bank and that was it! No more! So we had 3,000 for the taxi and 1,000 for the fee and 1,000 in the bank.

After 3 1/2 non eventful, song filled, and car sick (for me..first time in my life) hours...going over mountains...we were there. We got out...took a potty break that went something like this:

and on we went. We went through the Thai border very easily...but we noticed a sign that said that there was a 500 baht fee at the Burmese border so John went to an ATM before we were done at the window and got our last 1,000 baht to pay at the Burmese border.

I assumed (to my detriment) that that was only for adults. Seeing as the Thai side only charges fees for adults. So...John and I came into the office after following the "foreigner signs" and the guy took our passports and I gave him the 1,000 baht and he said that he needed 1,500 more. My mouth just dropped open. I explained to him that we didn't know and didn't think they charged for children and he just looked at me and said...go to the ATM.

I looked at John...and was just like a deer in the head lights. I went on to explain to them that we are not tourists and that we did not have the money in the bank. They just looked at me right back and said go get the money from the bank. I told them we did not have it...and he said..."Then you can't come into Mayanmar(Burma)"

In a moment of shear stupidity I went onto say "We are not toursists...we're missionaries...we don't have lots of money...there is no money in the bank..." Why is that so stupid??? Because Myanmar is a closed country and they could have decided not to allow us to enter period because I said that or they could have thought up some crazy reason to arrest us on the spot because they want to...All 4 sitting at that table looked like the epitome of crooked police if I had ever seen them.

The main police guy had been chewing this root that turns your teeth redish color...it was really gross...anyway, we walked out of the office...trying to figure out what to do. We walked back over to the Thai said and asked them if we could come in...because we had already received our departing stamp but they guy said no - he said that you had to have a stamp from another country to enter.

I asked them if there was someone that could help us in this situation and they said no. I was just flabbergasted. My children are all over the place...Joss was getting heavy...Thai people are jopping (pinching their cheeks or arms) my children left and right and Jude is getting sick of it. So we realized that if we could get a hold of our taxi driver we could ask for the money that we gave him back. So I picked up the phone and called him and guess what happened?

My phone died. So...now John had to get through the border to find our taxi guy and get the money from him then slip back through the border and go with us to the Myanmar border!!! God must have seriously had his hand on John because regardless of the fact that there were tons of guards everywhere - John walked right through the border un noticed.

I waited there for a good 30 minutes for John to return. During that 30 minutes our friend the taxi driver had seen me through the border and called me and the kids over to the border line to give me the money. He hadn't seen John. My heart fluttered a bit...could he have gotten arrested because of no passport?...was he way away from the border still looking for our friend...but about 35 minutes later John came across the border yet again!

So we made our way to the Myanmar office again and paid them the money and they gave us our beloved stamp. Then we were off to the Thailand border again. We were through pretty easy although we made some tourists pretty frustrated while they waited behind us in line for the Thai officials to process all 5 of our passports ha!

Our trip back home was rough...but we made it. When we got back home Renee and Todd let us borrow the money to pay the taxi driver. I'll leave it at that and tell you about something that broke my heart while we were stuck between countries.

A 4 year old girl came up to me with a 2 week old baby strapped to her begging for money. There were many children begging for money and their faces were pittiful. I wish I had had my camera to show you. I tried to speak with one of the boys but he only spoke Burmese. They were so dirty and so disconnected.

It hurt so badly not being able to give them any money...we literally had nothing to give them. Josiah was so moved by it he wanted to go back to the taxi...go back through the border to give them his empty wallet because "they would really like a superman wallet". What an awesome ministry it would be to live on the border and just reach out to these children daily.

Love on them and speak into their lives...give them food so they don't have to go hungry. No telling where their parents were. I watched as some of them hid from the guards as they passed. I can not get that little 4 year old girl out of my mind. I can not fathom my little Josiah having to go and beg for money and OH were they good at it. Even the boy who couldn't speak Thai had learned how to begg for money in Thai.

My heart physically hurts to think about it. Please pray for these children. Even here in the city where we live on the busy highways...at the stop lights there are children that walk out to the cars during red lights to begg for money and to try to sell little flower decorations for your rearview mirror. Some of them Josiah's age and younger.

While I was filling out our paper work a tourist couple came by and was talking about the children and she said something that really hit home...because it's so easy to judge the parents for making their children go out and beg for money...soooooo easy. But to be completely honest with you...what this woman said is so true. When you can't feed your family - you use every resource available to you to get food...and no one wants to give to adults but they will to children.

When we were walking back from the Myanmar border after being told we could not get our stamp...I SERIOUSLY thought about setting out a burp rag on the ground and have Josiah and Jude sing and I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that within an hour or less we would have had the money we needed to get through the border. The Thai people love our children and can't resist them. It's just fact.

I know that might sound insane for some but what that tourist said is true. Imagine sitting at home with no way to get any food..the government won't help...and your children are willing...I was willing to allow my children to entertain for money or even take pictures with the Thai people for money...if it would get us through the border and back into thailand...SURE! Little would they have known that we let Thai people take pictures of our kids all the time...no big deal...for free.

So...keep these children in mind and take my advice...don't go on a border run without back up money...not that it could be helped in this instance. But God provided and we're home...no border runs for another 3 months.

When John asked Jude what he was doing he said: "Waitin for the ice cream man..."

Josiah and his invention of the day...

Cutie pie Joss...

HA! My oven mitt...

2008-10-16T08:50:00.000-07:00

It's like they're trying to tell me something...I know it...

Thai today...baby food...pics and videos...

2008-10-14T06:01:00.000-07:00

Thai was so awesome today. I felt like I was in a bible study rather than Thai. We read, in Thai, the account of when Peter denied Christ 3 times. Peter was present when Jesus was transfigured! He saw Moses and Elijah and heard the voice of God!!! He was the one who declared his love for Jesus at every opportunity and lopped off a guards ear...ready to defend Jesus.

It seems as though Peter was so sure of his love for Jesus and he had yet to receive the revelation that Jesus was the son of God...maybe he knew it in mind but not in spirit. If he had, would he have lopped off that guys ear? Would he have denied Christ had he listened to the many times that Jesus told them that he would die?

On the mountain when Jesus was transfigured...Peter was like...I can build us tents and we can stay here forever! (not thinking about Jesus would be neglecting everyone else if he had stayed upon the mountain...not to mention his mission) Also when they were leaving the mountain Jesus told them not to tell anyone what they had seen until the son of man had risen from the dead!

He just seemed to be missing the point. I don't know if I would have been the same way or not...but we can learn from Peters early mistakes as well as his life after Jesus died...we can learn so much! He didn't seem to take Jesus for his word though he loved him dearly. Now...Peter was an incredible disciple and after he denied Jesus 3 times he repented severely and became the epitomy of what Jesus spoke over him...You are Peter and upon this rock I will build my church.

But I feel like we can gleen so much from what we saw of Peter's life before that time. Do you love Jesus dearly...enough to bare his name...and fight for him but not enough to take him at his word...listen to what he teaches and take it in...mind, heart and soul. Because without the word of God hidden in your heart when times get rough...it will be as if a mountain has sat on your shoulders forbidding you to do anything other than deny Christ in different ways.

I want to encourage you to get into God's word...make the time...have the relationship...receive all he has for you and live life fully through Him.

On another note...I've been making baby food! 2 years ago when Jude was beginning to eat food I felt like there was no way I could make my own baby food. It just seemed too hard. So...now, money is tight and as long as a baby food jar costs over a dollar a piece...I will be making my own baby food. On top of the fact that they have a total of 3 flavors. Banana custard, Blueberry Muselini Dessert and Banana Pear.

I can't imagine eating Banana custard and Banana Pear over and over again...with dessert on occasion...can you? So...I went online...watched a few instructional videos and did some research borrowed a blender and I gave it a shot and it's EASY! Ahh...I could have saved us a lot of money back then. I spent about an hour in the kitchen and a total of about $1.24 to feed Jossalyn for almost 2 weeks!

2 ice trays of applesauce, carrots and pumpkin...

There would have been more pumpkin but...uhhh...John and I were
talking in the other room when we smelt this...

Finished applesauce, carrot and pumpkin servings...

A pic of our refrigerator...WHY am I showing you a picture of my refrigerator??? Because I am proud to show the world that I have more vegetables and fruits in my refrigerator RIGHT NOW than I have in the past 2 months! hehehe...change is a comin...

When I put Jude to sleep, I swear he was a completely normal 2 year old and
John found him as goggle man!

A new pic of little Jossie...

A very hot Josiah at the market with Daddy...

I love the way her eyes squint up when she smiles...

These are for you grandmaws and great grandmaws out there:
Jossalyn being totally cute:

Smiley Jossalyn and Jude:

Posts...Raw food...Pics...

2008-10-11T23:23:00.000-07:00

I hope you don't mind but I'm going to change the way I blog a bit for a bit. I want to get on here and just talk about whatever I've been thinking about...what God has been showing me and especially the little things...mostly around our home. There are times when I feel like I can't "bore" you with this stuff and then there are other times when I feel like people would stop reading because it's not all about Thailand and ministry.

But at this point in our life...until we moved down south at the end of November...thai class and our home is our life. We are learning how to be a family of 5 and how to be better parents...while Josiah and Jude learn how to love each other as brothers even though it is apparently extremely hard for 6 year olds and 2 year olds to play together...much less coexist in a house 24 hours a day with no ability to go anywhere as a family and get out of the house.

Don't get me wrong...I speak to Thai people everyday and when an opportunity arrises to tell about our God...I do. I have literallly stopped myself from posting about simple stuff...but I'm going to stop holding back and just post. :) Today I put my tennis shoes on because my feet have really been aching because of the lack of support offered by the sandles and pair of flip flops that I wear everyday. In Thailand it is custom to take your shoes off before entering any home...so we don't wear shoes in our house.

But I have been breaking the rules simply because my feet hurt so badly! So anyway, I was putting on my shoes and Jude automatically was like "Where we goin mom?" and I told him that we weren't going anywhere and he was like "Ohhh MAN!" with his cute pouty face.
We haven't been using the air conditioners during the day to save money and let me just say...it is hot! Especially today! So all three of my children are running around in underwear and diapers as usual...it's so normal(not wearing clothes ) that I laughed so hard when this happened this afternoon:

I decided to put some clothes on the boys and when I gave Josiah his clothes Jude got really excited and said "Where we goin? Where we goin mom?" I said "We're not going anywhere...we're just putting clothes on." He continued on..."(mumble...mumble...)and the clothes...(mumble...mumble...)and we go. Where we goin mom? and the clothes and we go..."
hahaha...my son has officially attached clothes to going somewhere...of course they can't just wear clothes in the house! hehehe...

So I've been thinking about a lot of things...one of which is wanting to prepare better meals for my family. I've been reading and hearing a lot about "going raw" for many years and I've always wanted to attempt to make our diet at least 50% raw...but I've never taken any steps because it seems so hard.

But...just recently I decided that I'm going to do a 10 or 30 day raw diet. Not for dieting purposes (although I'm sure to loose some weight) but for health purposes and it will force me to find foods and experiement. With that little bit of experience under my belt I will be able to think about creative ideas to start changing our eating habits.

Here are some of the things I'm working towards:

1. All raw food breakfast. There are sooo many choices for raw food
breakfast...apples, bananas, watermelon, pineapple, mangos, pomelo, oranges and
for the kids some real yogurt too...not the sugar packed kind.
2. Preparing a green smoothie every morning for my whole family. I can't really do this one until I can afford to buy a blender but you guys have got to look into this. Wouldn't it be great if you could make sure your family is getting 15 servings of fruits and vegetables a day? Not just the 5-10 the FDA recommends? Well, you can with this smoothie! (Sounding like an infomerial now)
This would be so easy for you guys to do...(people in America) because you have easy access to frozen fruits and veggies...and I don't think spinach costs too much? Anyway...check out this video and see how simple it really is: http://happyfoody.com/2008/03/15/how-to-make-a-green-smoothie/

3. Cut back on things like potatos, rice (ha! I live in Thailand - the country known for the worlds best tasting rice and every Thai dish is served with it!) and bread. Or at least switch to real whole wheat bread.
4. Use seasalt instead of regular salt. Ordinary table salt has been stripped of it's companion elements and contains additive. In studies table salts have been link to hypertension and other heart or blood illness. Table salt also gives many people the feeling of being bloating.
Natural sea salt is a healthy replacement for ordinary table salt on the market; it contains about 80 mineral elements that the body needs. Sea salt has nutrients and minerals that help your body preserve the blood cells. Overall, sea salts are better for you. If you haven't tried it, switch salts for a week and you will see a difference.
5. Exercise 3 times a week. Whether it be walking or popping in my beloved Kathy Smith Fat Burner DVD.

Are there any of you out there that would be interested in going raw with me for 10 or 30 days (haven't decided which)? Leave a comment and let me know...it'll be tough...especially for us Texan girls...but if you'd like to join me I'd love it!

Here are some awesome pictures from the last 3 days....

Ok...I LOVE this picture of my baby girl! AHH! Shiloh Pruett took this picture. Joss was strapped to my back and they were just laughing about something...so they asked for the camera and this is what they were laughing about...ha!

My handsome boys!

Jossie...oh how I love her...

Josiah had a death grip on my leg when it was time for me to head out to Thai class...I leaned down and snapped a shot...

This is Judah...he is staying with the Pruetts while his adoptive parents (the Garsees) are on furlough. He's such a ham! And soo cute!

This is little Joseph...the picture says it all...he's sooo cute! He is also staying with the Pruetts while the Garsees are in America for furlough.

Jude...looking a bit unsure about this ride...

LOOK! They're not FIGHTING!! WAHOO!!

Daddy and Jude being silly with our neck pillows...

Use #103 for using Bobby Pillows.
I love this picture of Jude...he thought this was sooo funny! hehehe...