The end of jetlag is finally in sight and I have to say I am so glad because my physical body couldn't have taken much more. Sunday evening we went to visit Pathway Church in
Whitesboro and at the end we were talking to different people and during one of my conversations I went completely blank...
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You know that embarrassed feeling when you feel your face burn? And that feeling of complete moronishness (?ok...just give me that word...my brain is just starting to wake up) just sticks with you for a few hours? Making you feel like you need to explain yourself and talk about it but you don't' because it reallly really wasn't that big of a deal!?? Does anyone know that feeling?
Ok...well, I forgot it existed. NOT that I don't do completely embarrassing things at times but it's something that God has taught me since my incredibly self conscious high school years...everyone messes up and it's not that big of a deal...so I am usually spared the red face as I laugh it off and move on...but last night I was not spared...OH NO!
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I was just trying to share how a good friend of ours explained what giving up Thailand for this season is like the best. I went on to say...(I have to say I was speaking coherently although my eyes were red and my mind was darting back and forth, along with my eyes trying to figure out where my children were) "A dear friend of ours gave us an example that really does explain what it's like leaving Thailand...In the old testament the story of.........." (insert blank stare here...)
....well, ummm....the story of....I'm trying to think of the story...(trying DESPERATELY to pull Abraham's name from my brain but it was like all the names of the men of God from the old testament were swirling together in one big crock pot and for the life of me I could not remember who almost sacrificed their son to GOD!!!! AHHH!!!)
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OK here is my honest flesh...as this point I know I'm in trouble so I try to start to think of the other story that is a good explanation of what we're going through and I can't think of any of that...I continued on in great pain....staring down and then up at her expectant face..."uhhh....well....I'm sorry....I'm trying to think of the other story...my brain just isn't working...when he sacrificed...(and then my flesh started kicking in...I was sinking and I didn't want to ask for help or let on that I was COMPLETELY STUMPED! I mean goodness...I'm a missionary...I KNOW THE STORY OF ABRAHAM....hehehehe...nope...to my demise I continued on stretching and grabbing for Isaac's father's name....oh what is it?!?!?! Someone put me out of my misery....PLEASE!)
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NOW...wasn't that painful!!!!??? OH where was I....oh yeah, and then she did it...she said "You mean Abraham?" and by that point I was trying so desperately to remember the other story I was just like....uh yeah...but what was the other one....oh man....
She gracefully let me give my excuses for sounding like such a completely incompetent missionary...lol...hehehehe...not that I know the bible inside or out or anything - I'm still working on that...but my goodness...you don't belong on the mission field if you don't know the word of God....much less the name of ABRAHAM and his many stories!
So yeah, I walked away feeling so idiotic...my eyes were burning from sleep deprivation and my head had a dull ache that just would not quit and my physical body had a involuntary slump that I could not correct no matter how I commanded myself to sit up. I should have been able to laugh that one off but I just felt so stupid...it's just pride.
I didn't want that woman, whom I had met once before...think that I was inept...LOL! And so I was embarrassed. God help me die! hehehee...until then...I will NEVER forget ABRAHAM...no matter how tired I am!!!!
Last night was our first night of real sleep and I am feelin good this morning!!!! WAHOO! This missions house is such a blessing...I still am just kind of in awe that we're here again. God is so good...I just keep saying it over and over again...I think some people are like...YES HE IS!!! STOP SAYING IT OVER AND OVER!!
Because I'm the kind of person that usually when I say something about the goodness of God I'm lookin for an AMEN or someone with eyes ready to meet mine in greatfulness....I just love when I'm giving glory to God and there is someone who is right there who is on the same page and they are just relishing in the goodness of God with me...
I got some pants yesterday and I am sooooooooooo RELIEVED to have them! Why am I relieved instead of glad? Glad that I'm not freezing in my capris anymore...?? Because I looked like a big goof ball running around in capris...men's socks and tennis shoes in cold weather. I'm not into fashion ladies...really I'm not...ask any one who knows me...but I have a few things in my head that are just no no's...and capris with socks and tennis shoes are one of them!!!
So since we touched down in America...I have been letting go of my pride as I go out in public like that. Apparently a lot of people were capris with socks and tennis shoes and it's not so weird as I think...because I would say something about it and people would be like "What's wrong with that?" So where did I get this fashion sense? No idea...but it still looks completely silly on me...to me.
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I am praying that my time with God each day will fill my cup up so much that I can't contain all that He is...and that it flows out of me effortlessly. HA! When I said that I thought of my sons...fighting...now...that will take some effort...handling them with gentleness and love...regardless of their attitudes...ugg...only through Him can I master that feat...So with that I'll leave you and be off for some time with Him while all are still asleep. Oppp...Joss is awake now...that's ok...Joss is a good prayer partner.
On another note...Jossalyn and Jude are both sick...please be praying for them. We are ready for them to be healed...they both have that lovely green snot and Joss has a really bad cough and when she breaths you can hear it in her little chest.